Don't Do That.

[SupervisingChildren]

Don't add dme to a boiling batch of beer without expecting a volcano.
Don't put your wort chiller in and turn on the water prior to making sure your output hose is in the sink all the way.

 

[unionrdr]

Don't add Bavarian wheat DME too much at a time, or face pele's revenge!

 

[beernbourbon]

While working on the bathroom remodel, graze on the amazing buffalo chicken dip your wife made from scratch Thursday night.

On Friday
...............and Saturday
.................................and Sunday

oof. Don't do that

 

[PrayCop]

My dad did that for years until he did it in the dark and saw the static electricity coming from the bag when he fluffed it open.

one of my friends and his old rodeo partner made an O2/Acetylene bomb with a construction grade trash bag. don't do that.

 

[Temptd2]

Move your entire website to the Cloud and leave the entire congregation hanging.

DON'T DO THAT!

:cross:

 

[SupervisingChildren]

Move your entire website to the Cloud and leave the entire congretation hanging.

DON'T DO THAT!

:cross:

Hahaha. That was HBT'S birthday present to me yesterday. Thanks a bunch! Hahaha

 

[Firewalker11]

Bring a web site down without putting a banner on the main page a few days before it happens and leave a LOT of people wondering what the heeel is going on?

Yea, don't freaking do that!!

 

[Mexibilly]

Carbonate a bottle full using SWMBO's soda stream on bottle day, definitely not while she's home or will be home before the mess is cleaned up

 

[unionrdr]

Spamming so much that real post get pushed back to pages 10 & 11...STOP DOING THAT!!

 

[Brewenstein]

When newly married and your wife says "If I ever start acting like my mother, you better tell me!"

Flash forward 20 years and you finally say it ... DONT' DO THAT!

 

[unionrdr]

I guess it depends on the mil? My wife took after her mother, ...figuratively speaking....:cross:

 

[bbohanon]

When your second son just enters into the world and before the cord is even cut, (I think my wife was also still screaming obsenities in pain at this point) you loudly exclaim "Damn, that one looks like a 20lb butterball turkey fresh out of the plastic wrapper!" and as you are walking around the doctor who is holding the kid and he asks "What are you doing?" you reply "Looking for the pop-up timer on his ass to see if he is done Doc!".

Don't do that.
I almost was barred from the delivery room (by the same doctor who delivered all 3 of my kids believe it or not) when my third child was being born..

 

[Jwin]

This
https://www.homebrewtalk.com/showthread.php?t=532937

 

[unionrdr]

When the spammer gets even bolder...don't do that!

 

[Rockn_M]

Not noticing when your wife has her hair colored and done until 3 days later when the check clears and you notice you are lighter by $100 in the bank account and during your investigation on the missing funds, you finally realize that was for her hair appointment and attempt to acknowledge at that point that you like what she did with her hair.



Don't do that.

Only $100. You got off cheap. I envy you!

 

[Riot]

First test of a newly rebuilt RIMs setup. Recipe with >10% flaked oats. Dont do that

 

[Schol-R-LEA]

Don't do that. Or, if you do that, give me time to get away from you and start recording it with my phone.

 

[Michigan_Wolfman]

:smack:Saw this one on the news earlier....Guy in Maine decides after drinking most of the day on the 4th, that it would be a good idea to set a mortar tube on top his head and light it. The tube exploded, killing him instantly. Definitely DON'T DO THAT, unless you fancy being this year's Darwin Award winner.

 

[unionrdr]

I saw that on fox8 news this morning. Darwin of the year award...

 

[grrickar]

Leaving 21lbs of wet grain in a 10 gallon igloo for two days in a warm garage after you drained the wort. Don't do that...

 

[JonM]

Ewwwwww...

 

[Mismost]

Leaving 21lbs of wet grain in a 10 gallon igloo for two days in a warm garage after you drained the wort. Don't do that...

That my good man, is what we in the South call "catfish chum"...it is very good stuff and much sought after down here! One man's trash, is another man's deluxe fish attractant!

 

[Kiichi]

Thinking you can make a bourton-ish IPA by adding oak chips to some bottles....don´t do that.

Make a 8% coffee stout with added caffeine, bringing it up to the strength by volume of really bloody strong coffe, and serve it to people without warning...in pint bottles. Don´t do that.....if you are not present to enjoy the aftermath.

Give your 4 year old that always helps you bottle homebrew a taste of warmly fermented & uncarbed English bitter before priming sugar was added...actually, do that. It´ll keep him away from the thought of beer for another 12 years till he is legally able to buy it...but 17 years after sends him down an extremely enthusiastic homebrew & craft beer path supplying you with a constant stream of cool stuff. So do that.
This one was brought to you from what I imagine my father´s mind to be. =)

Rely on bottlecaps to mark your brews...then use the same colour for different brews cause you thought you were all out, ending up with mistery cellar bottles. Don´t do that.

And finally, on behalf of a Swedish gentleman I met during my first festival, Wacken 07: During a festival day decide to drink 0,7L of Absolute Vodka through a beer bong....Don´t. F*cking. Do. That. Ever.
(He was out cold for around 24h, but ok in the end in case you wonder.)

 

[Schol-R-LEA]

Expecting calm, deliberate and thoughtful discussion in the Debate forum of an alcohol related website. Don't do that.

(Actually, the debate forum here is surprisingly mild, even if some of the opinions are a bit off-beat. It's the supposedly sober forums elsewhere that will flambe your hide on a whim.)

 

[Chiefer]

Start up your pump full of hot wort without closing the bleed valve while standing directly in the line of fire, don't do that

 

[rlmiller10]

Close. When the round went through, the pressure ruptured the bottle and created a 'cloud' of gasoline droplets. Like a mist. When it ignited, I felt it suck air towards it before I felt the concussion. The fireball was HUGE!

My wife's fault. She left me unsupervised...

Did it sort of look like this

https://www.youtube.com/watch?t=10&v=UyF0T1ZeVUs

 

[unionrdr]

Reminds me of " backdrafts" firemen can face that I wrote a song about years ago I named " breath of the dragon". They open a door sometimes, the air sucks back & booowwooooosh! the breath of the dragon is felt!

 

[rijnswand]

Don't do that. Or, if you do that, give me time to get away from you and start recording it with my phone.

I'm using 100% isopropyl alcohol in a spray bottle to sanitize my equipment. ipe:

 

[Kiichi]

Siphoned my wort off the boil pot and to get the most of it, also allow a bit of trub to get in, cause you get so much more wort for it. Finish up and check on the bucket 10h later to see more than a fist high of trub in the fermenter. Panic. Siphon the "good" wort off the trub stuff and have them sit side by side. Check back another 10h later to find that the trub has fallen to the height of half a pinky. Realize you forgot the Irish moss, slowing the drop out.

Don´t. Do. Any. Of. This.

 

[Mexibilly]

Get into a trade with a virgin trader, receive the 30+ pound box of beer, never send any beer and stop communicating entirely with the first timer.

 

[Brew_G]

Only a dick would do that.

 

[Mexibilly]

Only a dick would do that.

Based on his communications, he's had some s**tty luck lately.
I'm giving him the benefit of the doubt. I shouldn't probably have posted that. It oversimplifies the situation. But 3 weeks with no message leaves me a bit anxious and wondering...

 

[Michigan_Wolfman]

Having to be on an ASV machine because of sleep apnea, and reaching over and accidentally shutting the machine off in the middle of the night thinking you're shutting off the alarm clock that was set way too early.....Don't Do That.

 

[flars]

Worry over trub in the primary.

Don't do that!

 

[Brew_G]

Based on his communications, he's had some s**tty luck lately.

I'm giving him the benefit of the doubt. I shouldn't probably have posted that. It oversimplifies the situation. But 3 weeks with no message leaves me a bit anxious and wondering...

Fair enough. Good luck!

 

[Jwin]

Worry over trub in the primary.

Don't do that!

Just dumped all 11 gallons worth in. I still operated without a pump and try as I may, whirlpool in with my mash paddle doesn't work.

Got another few:

Forget to make a starter for a 10g batch.

Wait until brew day to put your bulkhead in your new mash tun, only to find out it doesn't fit. Extend brew day 1.5 hours while you go grab hardware to make it work damn it.

Think about your up coming porter brew while u r heating strike water for your red ipa which causes you to grab your hard to find (locally) coffee malt and toss it into your new mash tun first. "Mmmm that smells so good, wait wtf am I doing!"
Dump and rinse tun and start over.
Extend brew day an hour.

Fail to reheat strike water enough after spending an hour and a half going to LHBS to grab hardware to make new mash tun work. Mash in to low. Heat more water. Add. Wasnt hot enough. Heat more water. Add. Ok. Mow lawn. Come back to 146* mash tun. 1.065. Should be 1.080. Damn. Drain wort. Add 8 more gallons and let it mash while other boils down on full blast. Drain. Boil. Boil another 30 minutes. Add the rest. Start timer after an hour of boilng.

Attempt to chill 11g with a 25ft IC in July in Tennessee. You know it won't work, and you have planned to build a bigger one, but brew on anyway. (I recirculated ice water with a pond pump at the end btw...)

All this and more happened today. But 9.5 hours later, it's done and cleaned up. I've done 2 brews in less time with less propane.

I love brewing, but not today. Don't do any of that.

 

[Jwin]

That was my first fully sober brew day. Well, cracked one at the end of the chill with dinner.

I think I don't drink enough on brew days...
^don't think that

 

[blinker]

Adding DL-tartaric acid. Don't do that

 

[firerat]

duplicate...sorry

 

[firerat]

Defrosting a kegerator that has what looks like the iceberg that sank the Titanic on the cold plate in the man-cave upstairs on a plastic 1" deep liner because you know, it should all stay on the plastic, it's not that much water.....don't do that.....

Oh, and then trying to hide the lovely water spot on the downstairs living room ceiling from the wife with Kilz and fresh paint...don't do that either...