Cheesy Joke Thread...

[dibby33]

Sick one:

what is black, white, black, white, black, white, black, white, red, black,white, red, black, white


....a nun falling down the stairs

 

[brauhaus]

What's green and smells like pork?





Kermit's Finger.

 

[Parker36]

-What do you tell a woman with two black eyes?
-Nothing you haven't already told her twice.

Hooray domestic violence!

 

[FatMonsters]

What do you call a masturbating cow?

Beef Stroganoff

 

[Parker36]

-What do you call a Mexican with a rubber toe?
-Roberto

 

[Homercidal]

What's invisible and smells like carrots?












Bunny farts!

 

[arturo7]

A sandwich walks into a bar.

"Hey," says the bartender, "we don't serve food here!"

 

[dirtymike1]

A pirate walks into a bar

Barkeep asks him why theres a steering wheel coming out of his pants

The pirate replies "yar, it be driving me nutz"

 

[Bedlam]

Why don't Baptist have sex standing up?
They are afraid people will think they are dancing.

Why do you have to take TWO Baptists with you when you go fishing?



'Cause if you take just one, he'll drink all your beer!

 

[DeadYetiBrew]

A priest, child molester, and homosexual walk into a bar....

he orders a drink.
-
A priest and a rabbi were bored one day, the priest turns to the rabbi and says "I know let's go screw an altar boy!" The rabbi says, "Outta what?".

 

[Air Pirate]

two baby seals walk into a club....


ba DUM *tsh*

 

[User_05_28_08]

A duck walks into a bar, and asks, "Hey mister, do you have any duck food?"

The bartender says, "No, this is a bar. We don't have any duck food."

The duck leaves.

The next day, the duck comes back, and asks, "Hey mister, do you have any duck food?"

The bartender says, "NO! I told you, this is a bar, we don't have any duck food!"

The duck leaves.

The third day, the duck returns, "Hey mister, do you have any duck food?"

The bartender replies, "Look, I've told you twice, this is a bar, we have no duck food! If you come in here again asking for duck food, I'm going to nail your little webbed feet to the floor!"

The duck leaves.

On the fourth day, the duck returns, "Hey mister, do you have any nails?"

The bartender, obviously annoyed, yells in reply, "THIS IS A BAR!!! WHY WOULD WE HAVE NAILS?!?!?"

The duck asks, "Do you have any duck food?"

 

[VatorMan]

Q. Why couldn't Helen Keller drive?

A. Because she was a woman.

:rockin:

 

[dirtymike1]

A guy went to a psychiatrist. "Doc," he said, "I keep having these alternating recurring dreams. First I'm a teepee, then I'm a wigwam, then I'm a teepee, and then I'm a wigwam. It's driving me crazy. What's wrong with me?"

The doctor replied, "It's very simple. You're too tense (two tents)."

 

[menschmaschine]

From Family Guy:

How many dirty stinking apes does it take to change a light bulb?

Three...

One dirty stinking ape to change the light bulb and two dirty stinking apes to throw feces at each other!

I guess it was funnier when Peter Griffin was telling this joke to a group of Planet of the Apes apes as they were getting ready to attack him.

 

[DeadYetiBrew]

Also from family guy.

Peter: Why do women have ****s? So you have something to look at while you're talkin' to 'em.