Best News Headlines

[McMullan]

Eeeew!

https://www.huffpost.com/entry/woman-falls-in-toilet_n_62633b05e4b0ea625c073d1e

A case of really being 'in the sh*t'.

 

[bruce_the_loon]

A case of really being 'in the sh*t'.

At least she tried herself, we had a school principal force one of his students to climb into a pit toilet to retrieve his phone, and then paid the child the equivalent of a couple of dollars.

 

[Broothru]

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/science-environment-61155725

9th

Eeeew!

https://www.huffpost.com/entry/woman-falls-in-toilet_n_62633b05e4b0ea625c073d1e

I remember a class in journalism studying how to write compact, succinct headlines. And how not to. One that always stuck out in my memory was a story in a British journal about a man who had fallen into and was entombed in an outdoor pit toilet (we called them outhouses, growing up in the U.S. midwest) for quite some time before being rescued. The single column, three line headline read:

"Man
Interred
Lives"

Read it slowly out loud to appreciate the full irony.

 

[soccerdad]

There once was a fellow named Clyde
Who fell in an outhouse and died
And likewise his brother
Who fell in another
And now they're interred side by side

 

[soccerdad]

Charles Barkley admits to men banging him ...
https://thelibertyline.com/2022/04/22/charles-barkley-banging-you/

 

[homebeerbrewer]

So, hungry Florida kid grows up with a mom like this. This is how Florida Man is made.
https://apnews.com/article/3f5ebdfa4b1efa817062a9a25126b7bf

 

[balrog]

SM-nonFlorida-H. It's becoming a weird world of "Universe of One"-ness everywhere, for everything.

Esp on the roads.

Or God forbid you venture into a Trader Joes.

I stay away from Whole Foods.

Rant over.

Stay off my lawn. Now rant over.

 

[soccerdad]

Not to argue with you Balrog but I find esp on the roads to be extremely helpful.

 

[balrog]

Not to argue with you Balrog but I find esp on the roads to be extremely helpful.

You have to use ESP because nobody uses turn signals

 

[homebeerbrewer]

What are turn signals?

 

[doug293cz]

What are turn signals?

You're not part of the solution, are you.

Brew on

 

[Northern_Brewer]

Sabrina Imbler of the NYT is obviously a fan of Mr Brightside :
https://www.nytimes.com/2022/04/29/science/tiktaalik-fish-fossil-meme.html

 

[day_trippr]

Glad that's settled!

https://nationalpost.com/news/canada/canadian-astronauts-2022-federal-budget

 

[GrogNerd]

doesn't make sense.

seems to me it should follow maritime/admiralty law; in non-territorial/international waters, you are subject to the laws governing the country of the flag your vessel is flying.

don't see how space could be any different

 

[Northern_Brewer]

seems to me it should follow maritime/admiralty law...

don't see how space could be any different

I imagine that the difference is that "maritime/admiralty law" has had centuries to build up and establish institutions like the IMO, whereas if you don't have that international framework (that everyone takes for granted now that it exists), then it has to be explicitly spelt out at a national level.

Compare with 200 years ago, when it was not universally agreed that slavery was A Bad Thing, and there was no ban on transporting slaves on the high seas but some countries had abolished it at a national level and over time started actively stopping slave ships.

And to get on topic :
https://www.newsandstar.co.uk/news/16697718.farmer-impaled-tractor-spike-freak-accident/A farmer has revealed how a metal tractor spike punctured his lung - narrowly missing his heart....Dennis was able to pull the spike out of his chest and walk to his nearby farmhouse....The tractor's heavy metal arm, tipped with three two-feet long metal bale spikes, had suddenly collapsed onto him, piercing his chest, breaking ribs and puncturing one of his lungs...."There was blood coming out of the hole so I knew it was worse than a sticking plaster job."...Their footage shows Dr Weston treating Dennis, and quizzing him about the pain in his chest. Asked how bad it was on a scale of one to 10, the farmer replied: "About 4."...Within a week of coming out of hospital, Dennis was back doing light work around the farm.

They mekk'em tough up North...

 

[balrog]

They mekk'em tough up North...

Does that make him a Geordie Lad, fabled in song and story?

 

[Northern_Brewer]

The Land of the Free is just weird. Mind you, who knows what might have happened if that's what had been used "for law enforcement purposes" on George Floyd...

https://www.chron.com/politics/texas/article/In-Texas-even-possession-of-a-sex-toy-is-11161211.php
Texas ... labels the sex toy as an "obscene device" and declares it a crime if someone "possesses six or more obscene devices"...It does make exceptions for people who have the multiples of the device for medical and law enforcement purposes...Which means you can legally own more guns than sex toys in the Lone Star State.

 

[soccerdad]

But cops can own as many dildos as they want? Good plan.

 

[Northern_Brewer]

Talking of which, a man working at the British Bung Company went to court this week :
https://news.sky.com/story/calling-...harassment-employment-tribunal-rules-12611690

 

[Homebrew Harry]

The Land of the Free is just weird. Mind you, who knows what might have happened if that's what had been used "for law enforcement purposes" on George Floyd...

https://www.chron.com/politics/texas/article/In-Texas-even-possession-of-a-sex-toy-is-11161211.php
Texas ... labels the sex toy as an "obscene device" and declares it a crime if someone "possesses six or more obscene devices"...It does make exceptions for people who have the multiples of the device for medical and law enforcement purposes...Which means you can legally own more guns than sex toys in the Lone Star State.

Yeah. I bet there would be less cases of resisting arrest if there was a threat of a dildo being used on you !

 

[homebeerbrewer]

Talking of which, a man working at the British Bung Company went to court this week :
https://news.sky.com/story/calling-...harassment-employment-tribunal-rules-12611690

Damn, I've been sexually harassed for years...

 

[McMullan]

Talking of which, a man working at the British Bung Company went to court this week :
https://news.sky.com/story/calling-...harassment-employment-tribunal-rules-12611690

The three employment judges:

 

[bruce_the_loon]

The three employment judges:
View attachment 768915

You jest, but the tribunal was in fact bald. Meet Employment Judge Jonathan Brain, lead member of the tribunal

 

[McMullan]

You jest, but the tribunal was in fact bald. Meet Employment Judge Jonathan Brain, lead member of the tribunal

Clearly a conflict of interest influenced the panel's decision making. It needs to be challenged.

 

[day_trippr]

https://www.cnn.com/2022/05/17/india/indian-couple-sue-grandchild-intl-hnk-scli/index.html

 

[soccerdad]

So she was just acting, right?
https://www.foxla.com/news/woman-accused-of-performing-sex-act-in-florida-courthouse-arrested

 

[balrog]

She was "performing", not the same as acting. Maybe doing it for Florida Man. The solar radiation beats hot on the Sunshine State, indeed.

 

[soccerdad]

Oh - so "performance art" ?

 

[betarhoalphadelta]

 

[MaxStout]

Carnivorous Penis Plants is the name of my Ted Nugent/2 Live Crew tribute band.