Apparently I have evil gnomes stealing the bear out of my primary...

[cheezydemon3]

how do you get bears into your primary, I haven't seen one that small?

Ummmm. See BELOW

:



Good Question HSB, you have to start with bear embryos and fertilize them in your primary.

These bears grow a little strangely in the wort, you have to make sure they don't drown.

These wort bears, or "Hydro-bears" as we brewers call them, tend to drink some of the beer and you can expect to lose a gallon or more that is "absorbed" by the bears.

HOPE THAT HELPS!

 

[brewingkitty]

what about Honey I Shrunk the Bears!! ??

 

[DeafSmith]

The OP should consider himself lucky to be a gallon short. Because a little while after the bear drinks the gallon, he pees it back into the carboy. Then you're no longer a gallon short, but you have a gallon of bear piss in your beer.

 

[david_42]

don't forget that in addition to the beer the bear drinks, you'll also lose some beer via absorption by bear hair.

Gross! I always shave the bear first. The hair makes great stuffing for dog beds and the exercise is good for me.

OP - Not many people get a awesome thread going in their first 100 posts.

 

[Revvy]

So do you think we scared or shamed the OP away?

Does a beer sh*t in the woods?

 

[cheezydemon3]

Gross! I always shave the bear first. The hair makes great stuffing for dog beds and the exercise is good for me.

OP - Not many people get a awesome thread going in their first 100 posts.

Lol!

I don't know revvy, but my sister was once bitten by a beer. It is no joking matter.

 

[JLem]

you can find just about anything if you google for it...

 

[cheezydemon3]

There is no gnome in that pic........

 

[Silby8919]

You guys sound like a buddy of mine.

Sittin around his camper (since he got kicked outta the house), eatin' cheetos, drinkin homebrew,watchin' porn..................& wonderin' why his pee pee's turnin' orange.

 

[BioBeing]

Good Question HSB, you have to start with bear embryos and fertilize them in your primary.

These bears grow a little strangely in the wort, you have to make sure they don't drown.

These wort bears, or "Hydro-bears" as we brewers call them, tend to drink some of the beer and you can expect to lose a gallon or more that is "absorbed" by the bears.

HOPE THAT HELPS!

Ummm - an embryo doesn't need fertilizing again.

Now, if you start with a bear egg, then you will need bear semen. I find the gnomes help in obtaining that.

 

[brewingkitty]

ewwwwwwy!

 

[JLem]

There is no gnome in that pic........

that's why the bear's still in the beer!

 

[Brewdouche-RuBrew]

Ummm - an embryo doesn't need fertilizing again.

Now, if you start with a bear egg, then you will need bear semen. I find the gnomes help in obtaining that.

In order to get bear in your beer carboy you need a good starter.

 

[earthboundagain]

Truly epic, if only I could get this gnome riding a bear pic to upload.

 

[brewingkitty]

are either of these the offenders??

\

 

[Ciliorozo]

You see what happens when you let the gnomes drink! They get a little feisty and think they own the yard!

Now I need to go and find some of Revvy's beer fairies to keep these gnomes in check!

 

[bsdx]

We've heard of hops, wood chips, watches, brushes, cheez-its, rubber grommets, insects and bees in the primary, but the bear fitting in the fermenter is obvious, it was a teddy bear. I've tried dry hopping with various stuffed animals, remember to sanitize them with high heat in the dryer first, but bears tend to soak up the most especially when dry. Try a 50/50 combination of Lucky rabbit foot and willamette for best results.

 

[Boerderij_Kabouter]

There is only one thing to do when your Gnomes get out of control... call the mole police.

 

[JetSmooth]

See what happens when the bear gets out of your carboy?

Tsk Tsk Tsk.

CNN: Bear attacks leave one dead, two injured at Montana campgrounds
http://www.cnn.com/2010/US/07/28/montana.bear.attack/
http://www.cnn.com/2010/US/07/28/mo...+(RSS:+Top+Stories)&utm_content=Google+Reader

 

[maxamuus]

Guess it could be worse...

 

[FromZwolle]

i've gotten bare in my primary once, but i'm not really proud of it. the neighbors invited the police over to help be back out and everything.

 

[JLem]

Guess it could be worse...

I had no idea gnomes left presents behind once they've gotten the bear out...

 

[BrewSpook]

Well this is 10 minutes of my life I will never get back. Thank you all for this awesome thread.


And they lived happily ever after...

 

[cheezydemon3]

That's not a bear, it's a Wookie.


I have not been able to fertilize one of thos in my primary, but maybe a good thing.

I thought they would be less tempting to gnomes, but evidently wookies steal gnomes......from their motorcycles.

 

[Revvy]

 

[maxamuus]

That's not a bear, it's a Wookie.

Did you say wookie or whoopi?

 

[cheezydemon3]

I swear I thought this guy had a gnome and a bear for a split second.
https://cdn.homebrewtalk.com/gallery/showphoto.php?photo=5836

 

[Mischief_Brewing]

Best thread ever.

And thanks Revvy, now I can't get that damn song out of my head!

 

[cheezydemon3]

EPIC PROST

(had to dig this nugget out)

 

[cheezydemon3]

Guess it could be worse...

I know!!! Like right??!? You may NEVER get your picture to upload!!!!!

Seriously though, Hydro bear ownership is serious business.

A drunk bear on the loose is a danger to himself and everyone.....especially to the gnomes who are collecting his semen.