You know you're a home brewer when?

[Mihkelj]

When you use Bar Keeper's Friend for the first time on an old SS kettle previously used for distilling 10+ years ago and find yourself talking to it using words like "so shiny" and "my precious"...

 

[bbohanon]

When Black Friday rolls around and all you are interested in are the deals on chest freezers.

just catching up on this thread and I was actually looking through these right before arriving here.
:fro:

 

[bbohanon]

I have a 12x16 foot shed that is going to be the brewery next year! Have to clean and insulate, wire it, finish the interior and put something waterproof on the floor...

Been there done that..well worth the investment! My build is linked in sig.

 

[Bosh]

Where is the hate button?

Luckily that will never happen, this is Koreans we're talking about.

 

[TrustyOlJohnson]

Gah! Don't remind me... that was the most nerve racking part of my build... putting holes in 3 shiny new Blichmann kettles! I dreaded the day I had to do it and kept putting it off as long as I could. Fortunately it worked perfectly.

Kal

WHAT is that tool and where can I buy one?

 

[MaryB]

Greenlee punch, I have the conduit sized set but they make them in all sizes. NOT cheap!

 

[eSePeludo]

When you have a nightmare about your wife opening two liter bottles of your beer to share with friends and then leaving them open on the table all night 90% full.

swmbo one time bugged me to break out 2 bottles of a very tasty ris for her and her friend, only to find out that they drank less than half each!!!!! I was pissed.

 

[olephart]

Your printer breaks down and you scramble to find another one so you can print labels.

 

[sfish]

Greenlee punch, I have the conduit sized set but they make them in all sizes. NOT cheap!

Just saying~ do you rent your tool kal? TrustyOlJohnson may wish to rent yours instead of buying a new one for a one time use.

 

[Krown]

When you spend every spare moment, including post coffee poops at work to read on beer. (Now try to guess what I am doing atm!)

 

[eSePeludo]

When you spend every spare moment, including post coffee poops at work to read on beer. (Now try to guess what I am doing atm!)

Are you krowning?

 

[Murphys_Law]

When you post TMI on a home brew site!

 

[GHBWNY]

When your wife --- who used to ask you for a list of Christmas gift suggestions that required her to make long trips to the mall and other places --- now simply hands you the latest NB catalog and says, "circle a few things". And while you insist you don't need anything, you oblige her anyways because you know it will make her happy. Or someone.

 

[pshankstar]

When you keep receiving packages in the mail from online Christmas shopping and when they arrive the kids ask "What's in the box"? Your wife responds "Dad keeps ordering more brewing stuff". Kids "Oh ok" (to mom) then find dad later in the day and say "Dad, what kind of cool things did you get this time?". Or they just shrug it off like it normal in our house.

 

[Know]

When you HAVE to look up a clone recipe for every beer you drink, while you're drinking it. For mental notes

 

[Vandulus]

You keep an Access Database of your favorite beers including ABV, IBU and ingredients (when given)!

 

[badgerfan79]

The dog sits by the door and whines because squirrels are having a feast with the grains you spread out in the backyard.

 

[woo_pig]

Just saying~ do you rent your tool kal? TrustyOlJohnson may wish to rent yours instead of buying a new one for a one time use.

You can rent them from sunbelt .

 

[Biscuits]

...When you sample your homebrew at 5AM before work.

 

[GHBWNY]

The dog sits by the door and whines because squirrels are having a feast with the grains you spread out in the backyard.

When I sit by the front door and whine until someone lets me out to go to the LHBS.

 

[Onkel_Udo]

When I sit by the front door and whine until someone lets me out to go to the LHBS.

Did you forget you have thumbs or did they take away your door keys...

 

[brewcat]

You've contacted multiple breweries about flawed product (e.g. infected).

 

[BigMack]

When you HAVE to look up a clone recipe for every beer you drink, while you're drinking it. For mental notes

I get mocked mercilessly by the SWMBO for doing this. Thankfully some breweries make it easy and just put the malts and hops they use on the bottle or on their website.

 

[stella_tigre]

I get mocked mercilessly by the SWMBO for doing this. Thankfully some breweries make it easy and just put the malts and hops they use on the bottle or on their website.

HWMO does not ever mock me for this....We are usually trying to figure out the hops, as part of my hobby (gardener as well as brewer) is the idea of growing 3 or 4 hops varieties, you know, just in case the zombie apocalypse thing. Only shortcoming there is we ain't got a way to grow a lot of barley and malt it. But that's what the whole barter system is for!

 

[BigMack]

HWMO does not ever mock me for this....We are usually trying to figure out the hops, as part of my hobby (gardener as well as brewer) is the idea of growing 3 or 4 hops varieties, you know, just in case the zombie apocalypse thing. Only shortcoming there is we ain't got a way to grow a lot of barley and malt it. But that's what the whole barter system is for!

Well the mocking is mostly teasing thankfully. I would love to one day be able to truly make a beer I made from growing the grain and hops, to malting the barley, to capturing wild yeast. That would be pretty awesome.

 

[MaryB]

I do not rent tools, have gotten things back badly broken. Punch sets like these need to be well oiled during use...

Just saying~ do you rent your tool kal? TrustyOlJohnson may wish to rent yours instead of buying a new one for a one time use.

 

[MaryB]

When you debate methods to keep your garden hose from freezing solid at -8f temps... I need to invest in a pump and a couple water barrels! Garage is heated to 40 or so so nothing freezes solid in there!

 

[TheMadKing]

When you debate methods to keep your garden hose from freezing solid at -8f temps... I need to invest in a pump and a couple water barrels! Garage is heated to 40 or so so nothing freezes solid in there!

Either drain it, or keep it trickling.. If it does freeze, throw it in the bath tub and run the shower for a bit. Been there done that haha

 

[Onkel_Udo]

When you debate methods to keep your garden hose from freezing solid at -8f temps... I need to invest in a pump and a couple water barrels! Garage is heated to 40 or so so nothing freezes solid in there!

All you need is the pump and a 5 gallon bucket...or switch to no-chill.

 

[csurowiec]

When you pull a bottle of a winter warmer you brewed that is "cellared" in a cold unfinished part of the basement with the case box sitting directly on the concrete floor. Upon opening you stick an instant read thermometer in it to see what temp it is being stored at before pouring and are quite pleased it is 56 F. Mmm tastes good at that temp too.

 

[Murphys_Law]

When you go to a job interview and they ask about your hobbies...spend the next 20 mins talking about beer (he did most of the talking).

 

[treacheroustexan]

When you go to a job interview and they ask about your hobbies...spend the next 20 mins talking about beer (he did most of the talking).

Gotta love when that happens!

 

[JunkCatsOnThePorch]

This has worked for me. Add it to your resume somewhere.

"Scaling, manipulating and perfecting sensitive recipes"

"Cleaning, sanitizing and proper storage of specialized equipment"

Landed me a comfy lab tech job. That was about half of the interview.

 

[Ed-Wort]

When you hug your fermentor before going to bed so that your yeast know they are loved.

 

[mikeasu]

When you go to a job interview and they ask about your hobbies...spend the next 20 mins talking about beer (he did most of the talking).

Likewise...
1) mentioning all-grain showed I took the hobby seriously (well, more serious than the section supervisor and program manager interviewing me at the time - both homebrewers themselves)

2) Didn't hurt that I mentioned brewing a passable Sweet Baby Jesus clone (local to my workplace)

Got the job, been a great almost two years here. Passed out a case of braggot yesterday for the holidays.

 

[olephart]

... when you can't decide which beer goes with the picked eggs you're setting out for Santa Claus.

 

[bbohanon]

swmbo one time bugged me to break out 2 bottles of a very tasty ris for her and her friend, only to find out that they drank less than half each!!!!! I was pissed.

I had a friend pull this crap with me..was hounding me for a kick ass bier de garde I had made and only drank half of the 2nd to the last bottle I had left and was like.."I ate before I came over and I am just full...the beer is awesome though!"

He comes over on an empty stomach now or he does not get served at all.

 

[eSePeludo]

I had a friend pull this crap with me..was hounding me for a kick ass bier de garde I had made and only drank half of the 2nd to the last bottle I had left and was like.."I ate before I came over and I am just full...the beer is awesome though!"

He comes over on an empty stomach now or he does not get served at all.

Man thats rough i at least had a sixer left. I would have been pissed. Im glad he learned though lol.

 

[MaryB]

I am doing 11 gallon batches. 5 gallons of water won't cool it! And I prefer a rapid chill to fermenting temps!

All you need is the pump and a 5 gallon bucket...or switch to no-chill.

 

[Onkel_Udo]

I am doing 11 gallon batches. 5 gallons of water won't cool it!

Sorry...though "and ice" was a given. If you have snow lying around, works too.