She Walks in the Willows with Pandas

CornyKegs 728
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I've actually been considerng myself some sort of weird cross between Arlo Guthrie and George Castanza. Of course in my case it was explaining to the Trooper about the pictures and arrows and the paragraph on the back of my ticket. I think the George Castanza reference is self explainatory.

PTN
 
I want to grope. I want to grope. I want to GROPE!!


And the Trooper started jumping up and down on the bench next to me and shouting GROPE GROPE GROPE.

And then Teddy Kennedy came out and pinned a medal on me and we all went back to having fun with the deli tickets
 
Reminds me of the Celtic's offseason signing, Marquis Daniels. Apparently his tat, which was SUPPOSED to represent his initials (even though, uh... Chinese characters don't really work like that), instead reads "healthy, woman, roof"

Marquis+Daniels+tattoos.bmp


So Paul, yes you can bring your new g/f to the house, but she's not allowed on top of the garage.
 
Awesome story! Had me laughing so hard, I had to stop and finish after lunch!

Felt just like a Pat McManus story, except nothing to do with the outdoors.
 
Awesome! I about spewed my snap peas over this one. You just can't make that **** up. WHat a nice little tale about mundane life events...and the ass that ate Manhattan...
 
I'm still giggling inside after reading this last night. Thanks for taking one for the team and grabbing her ass. You gave us all a good story.
 
That was a pretty good story and the way you described it made it that much better. I think this would be pretty funny as one of those simple animated shorts, you know, the stick figure kind.
 
paulthenurse said:
Like the one where you were just about to jump off the stern of a boat a mile offshore wearing 40 lbs of lead wearing an empty scuba tank? You're right, I like that story better. Except it didn't have the happy ending I was yearning for.

PTN
Click to expand...



Did I say "yearning?"

Oh good, I did. Thought I might have said something lame like hoping.

PTN
 
CB: Grow up and realize we are all sick of your lame attempts to pick on poor PTN. Look how pathetic he has become. To "make himself happy" he has to grab at the largest a$$ in the world. You should not make fun of him, you should pity him....
 
Whoaaaaaaaaa look who is being allowed 15 minutes of computer time!!!!

Holy smokes!!!! What did you do? wash all of the windows and then clean and iron the curtains??
 
Nice story. Last time I was at the DMV here, I met a stripper, and learned lots of interesting things about that occupation. So, the wait went by rather quickly. And we ended up exchanging phone numbers before parting ways.
 
And I wasn't going in the water with an empty tank... every dive boat I've been on (and I READILY admit it is not many), when I've come out of the water on my first dive, the tanks have gotten switched out for me. And if memory serves me correctly, my "host" (Mr. PTN) said about 4,000 times "Oh these guys are the best guys EVER... they practically wipe you azz for you! They'll do everything for you, you don't have to lift a finger. They'll even put your gloves on you"

SO... STUPID ME... I just assumed it would be taken of.

And there is ZERO chance i would have jumped in the water without checking my air level.
 
weirdboy said:
Nice story. Last time I was at the DMV here, I met a stripper, and learned lots of interesting things about that occupation. So, the wait went by rather quickly. And we ended up exchanging phone numbers before parting ways.
Click to expand...

Exchange anything else? Body fluids? STDs?
 
Awesome story! You should have your own section for story telling. I felt like I was there! And yes that was a HUGE ass!
 
I'm just going to assume the worst at this point, namely, that you convinced yourself sticking your dick in a stripper was somehow a good idea.
 

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