Rat Bastards

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Awesome, i want that on a tshirt.

Just noticed the website name in the corner. Guess i can have it after all
 
Update on the garage western front. Sought to eradicate the varmits food supply by blowing spent grain out of garage. Spooked one of the rat bastards and it ran under some shelving. I shot that **** out from under there with gale force windage and sent that f'r right out the front of the garage. I was hoping a circling hawk would finish the job, but the rat bastard made it to the bushes. Leaf Gatling Gun Blower 1, Mice 0.
 
btw... to go back to reality... just put the grains in the freezer. Keeps the rodents away from them and kills the weevils.
 
I keep thinking of that movie "SNAKES on the GRAIN" with Samuel L Jackson saying it !!!
 
When I was a kid, my sister had horses. We used to get rats in the barn (going after the feed).

Solution:

Get a lawn chair, one of these, sit back and prepare to be amazed/entertained (I think her record was 6 in under a minute) Also easier to please and more loyal than a cat...

booboo.jpg
 
The mice have obviously partnered with the Romulans and developed some sort of cloaking device. They can also now reach warp speed.

I came outside into the garage last night, carefully turning the lights on while our scopes monitored for movement. Nothing. Went to put the iceberg back in the freezer (a gallon of water I freeze to keep the fermenters in the tub cool), and one of the rat bastards is on the lower level of my brew stand! It jumps off and scurries underneath. Scanning underneath, I locate said rat bastard in the back right corner under the brew stand. I launch my mash paddle torpedo and miss! Rat bastard is obviously stupid, and merely moves to the other side of the brew stand. Launch brew bucket lid torpedo and flush him out. It's a race across the open garage floor with rat bastard hitting warp 10, and I'm unable to reach him before he reaches the air compressor on the other side of the garage. I remove the air compressor, and poof!, gone. Obviously rat bastard has turned on his cloaking device.

Until next time RB...until next time.

Me 1, Rat Bastards 1

I wish I'd had a pellet gun...coulda picked him off easily under that brew stand :(
 
What are you gonna do, nice 30 year old charlotte boy, didn't wanna get mixed up in the brewing business. Now you want to gun down a bunch of mice. Why? Because they ate some of your grains? What do you think this is like paintball where you can shoot 'em from a mile away? No, you gotta get up like this and, badda bing, you blow their brains all over your nice brew stand.
 
I bought a bunch of steel office cabinets off of Craigslist for storing canned goods, etc and have yet to find an animal willing to chew through them. They go around here for less then $50 and are fairly heavy duty. Nothing that would stop a honeybadger but the rats would be deterred.
 
jdlev said:
The mice have obviously partnered with the Romulans and developed some sort of cloaking device. They can also now reach warp speed.

I came outside into the garage last night, carefully turning the lights on while our scopes monitored for movement. Nothing. Went to put the iceberg back in the freezer (a gallon of water I freeze to keep the fermenters in the tub cool), and one of the rat bastards is on the lower level of my brew stand! It jumps off and scurries underneath. Scanning underneath, I locate said rat bastard in the back right corner under the brew stand. I launch my mash paddle torpedo and miss! Rat bastard is obviously stupid, and merely moves to the other side of the brew stand. Launch brew bucket lid torpedo and flush him out. It's a race across the open garage floor with rat bastard hitting warp 10, and I'm unable to reach him before he reaches the air compressor on the other side of the garage. I remove the air compressor, and poof!, gone. Obviously rat bastard has turned on his cloaking device.

Until next time RB...until next time.

Me 1, Rat Bastards 1

I wish I'd had a pellet gun...coulda picked him off easily under that brew stand :(
Click to expand...

They are not stupid, they're merely taunting you. Get a bunch of glue traps, bait them with peanut butter cups, and put them along the walls where the rat bastards have been. In time, you will get them all. Remember, they breed fast, so it may take a little time. I've had the same experience as you in both my basement and my RV, they can be defeated. There is no such word as failure!!:)
 
PIGMAN said:
They are not stupid, they're merely taunting you. Get a bunch of glue traps, bait them with peanut butter cups, and put them along the walls where the rat bastards have been. In time, you will get them all. Remember, they breed fast, so it may take a little time. I've had the same experience as you in both my basement and my RV, they can be defeated. There is no such word as failure!!:)
Click to expand...

Well, I was going to use mustard gas, but that's prevented by the genieva convention. So, I resorted to putting out a bunch of tomcat poison traps. We'll see how long they last...
 
I'm losing the war. I need a nuclear option. I don't know what the f I saw this morning, but when I opened the garage door either a rat (real one), kitten, chipmunk, or the world's largest mouse bolted out the front. I'm trying to wire under the stairs in the garage, and one of the rat bastards bolts as soon as I open the storage area. I've fought back with 3 tomcat trays of poison..one has seen mild activities. I have a snap trap that hasn't seen crap that's baited with peanut butter. I have one of those fake 9mm pellet guns. I could go as big as my .32, but I don't want a mess, and the bullet holes would be a problem. I've considered a flame thrower in with a modified wd40 can just to enjoy seeing the rat bastards scurrying around on fire...which would be awesome until they jumped into the gas can.

The mice are winning this war, and appear to have partnered with the rat taliban. I need to go nuclear to take back my garage.
 
I had a rat problem a few years back...

I have a replica Rogers & Spencer mod 1859 44cal revolver, I loaded it with 25 grains fffg black powder, and as much #4 bird shot as I could fit with a felt wad on top, 5 of the six chambers...

I sat in the dark waiting........

I finally heard a soft scurrying sound, eased back the hammer on my hog-leg, aimed in the general direction of the sound and flipped on my light.

The bastard was sitting on his hind legs right beside my water pipes (plastic pvc of course), I swear the f***er gave me the finger.. I was seriously considering blowing away rat, wall, water pipes and all when he moseyed away following the line of my plumbing. At that point the air suddenly turned blue..

Yes, a pellet gun would have been a much better choice for rat hunting. (I didn't have one at the time)
 
I've thought about renting a predator suit so the rat bastards can't see me sneaking up on them. That laser guided thing on the shoulder is pretty sweet too. Anyone know where I can get one of those for cheap too?
 
We have a male black American short hair cat. biggest cahoons I've ever seen on a cat. We had a second mouse I spotted by the sofa the other day where the kids fell asleep eating crackers. They also had the front door open late as well,aaah,summer...
So,last night my middle son spots this long eared fool,grabs the cat,& sets him down where we usually see him,right by the back off the sofa,facing the dinette. Smokey (Nagata,he's quick!) sees the lil prick,& blam! like a lion with a Gazelle! Vicious,vicious,mmmmutha-huncha (Halford's Fight). Cool to watch,better than Mutual of Omaha's "wild kingdom"! Rat Bastard #2 bites the dust!:rockin:
 
jdlev said:
Well, I was going to use mustard gas, but that's prevented by the genieva convention. So, I resorted to putting out a bunch of tomcat poison traps. We'll see how long they last...
Click to expand...

The rats in the garage at my old house ate those things and asked me "What's for dessert?" Didn't do a damn thing to them.

They moved to my backyard to spawn... dug a hole under my little storage bench to raise their little terrorist babies and my Cavalier King Charles Spaniel shredded their rat fink bastard children. Played with them like they were chew toys. She got some steak that night.

They're still in the garage, though...
 
We have a schnauzer and get this a 'rat' terrier. Neither would even bother to move if a mouse runs across their snouts!
 
Rat terriers are excellent at finding truffles though. The Italians use'em for that. White & black truffles grow underground over here. They're worth some good bucks,too.
 
unionrdr said:
We have a male black American short hair cat. biggest cahoons I've ever seen on a cat. We had a second mouse I spotted by the sofa the other day where the kids fell asleep eating crackers. They also had the front door open late as well,aaah,summer...
So,last night my middle son spots this long eared fool,grabs the cat,& sets him down where we usually see him,right by the back off the sofa,facing the dinette. Smokey (Nagata,he's quick!) sees the lil prick,& blam! like a lion with a Gazelle! Vicious,vicious,mmmmutha-huncha (Halford's Fight). Cool to watch,better than Mutual of Omaha's "wild kingdom"! Rat Bastard #2 bites the dust!:rockin:
Click to expand...

Gotta love a good mouser cat!
 
unionrdr said:
Rat terriers are excellent at finding truffles though. The Italians use'em for that. White & black truffles grow underground over here. They're worth some good bucks,too.
Click to expand...

Pigs are good for that too,( truffles that is).
 
jdlev said:
I've thought about renting a predator suit so the rat bastards can't see me sneaking up on them. That laser guided thing on the shoulder is pretty sweet too. Anyone know where I can get one of those for cheap too?
Click to expand...

I'll say it again, I've always had luck with glue traps. Use Reeses as bait. If you're getting rats, that's a different story.:mug:
 
jdlev said:
Mice love grain. One of the factors I didn't think about when I went all grain:mad: The rat bastards are everywhere in my garage now. When I brew, I see at least one. One of the rat bastards decided to declare war today. I picked up some plants to move them outside, and one rat bastard tried to run up my arm:eek: I dropped it and shrieked like an 8 year old school girl.

This means war....:mad:
Click to expand...

Hmmm i keep mice as pets, they run around on my shoulders all the time. If you want to get rid of them just get some poison traps.
 
Yeah,I've seen them do that back home in WV. And that cat is one quick killer fer sher. To paraphrase Alice;"You're as stiff as my smokin claws,you're as dead as a summer night. You're a snack,& I'm a legend,You're digesting,& I must sleep". Natural born killer...:ban:
 
Just go to the next gun show. They sell old war pamphlets on making "chemical incendiaries". Their made out of common household chemicals. Ever watch the movie "shooter"? I like the scene with the old man in Tenn. "you're saying the guys that shot JFK are buried out in the desert?" "Still got the shovel!". That says it all. Bbq their cahoons!
 
DeCon pellets in the trays. One in each corner of the garage (out of the way so you don't accidentally kick it/pets can easily see it). You mouse problem will be solved within one week. Guaranteed.
 
bja said:
I have a recipe for Napalm.
Click to expand...

I used to make "napalm" when I was young messing around in the backyard. My recipe was Styrofoam mixed with gasoline pulled from my dads lawnmower. It would turn into a gooey flame ball. Throw that at the little bastards and see how they like it!
 

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