Anyone have one of those neighbors?

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Love David Thorne actually. I read this quite a few years ago now. Click some of his other stuff on the left bar.
 
Thorne is a damn evil genius. The man is a treasure. His Twitter is the reason I still have Twitter.
 
My neighbors latest assholeness.

We have a monthly street sweeper come by in our city. He always has a car or 2 of his parked on my curb so the curb doesn't get cleaned. Yesterday when he heard the sweeper coming he raced out and moved his 3rd car that he parks on the curb in front of his house over to my curb. His curb got nicely scrubbed, mine is a dirty mess now with 3 of his cars on it.

When he got out of his car after moving it I was yelling out my window at him. The sweeper was pretty loud so I don't think he caught most of what I was saying.
 
I have a hoarder lady next door. 1700 sq/ft house and 3 car garage packed to bursting with stuff. Front and backyard covered in carpet. Scrounges cardboard and stacks it in her carport and back patio. Catches and saves rainwater everywhere around her house for her mosquito breeding project. The carpet and cardboard have become her pack rat and termite breeding project.
This last year, myself and some of the other neighbors have begun a campaign of complaints to the city. This year we'll be adding some county health department complaints also due to the mosquito boom lately.
 
I was "that neighbor" last night. Had about 40 people over and we was loud and drunk. Invited the neighbors and only one came over. Finally shut it down at 1:00am.
 
MaddBaggins said:
I have a hoarder lady next door. 1700 sq/ft house and 3 car garage packed to bursting with stuff. Front and backyard covered in carpet. Scrounges cardboard and stacks it in her carport and back patio. Catches and saves rainwater everywhere around her house for her mosquito breeding project. The carpet and cardboard have become her pack rat and termite breeding project.

This last year, myself and some of the other neighbors have begun a campaign of complaints to the city. This year we'll be adding some county health department complaints also due to the mosquito boom lately.
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If, for some reason, a very bad smell comes from her yard/possibly house...

They'll likely go inside and find conditions that need fixing asap. Watching the news and TV shows, it seems like odors get the attention of authorities like nothing else.
 
Heavenly said:
You know the one that has absolutely no clue how annoying they are...even when you politely tell them? Note: It's summer, it's hot, I have no A/C. So we have to keep the windows open to keep cool.



So my next door neighbors dog will usually bark for about 30 seconds somewhere between 10pm and 6am. So every night while I'm enjoying my slumber my wife and I are rudely awakened by this beast with the loud bark. I usually have a hard time getting back to sleep, especially after I'm forcefully awakened. My nerves are heightened and the adrenaline is pumping. etc.



We're in city limits and this guy also has chickens. These buggers start going off every morning at about 6am. He's been saying for a year now that he's getting rid of them in a few weeks. :cross:



I'll continue. This guy owns 5 cars, a long pop up trailer, and "stuff". The "stuff" is in his garage and I would guess about half of his driveway. The pop up is also on his driveway. The cars are mostly on "my" curb. I never park on this curb because a car makes the view from my backyard look bad. It's a long story. But, he never parks his cars on his curb. :confused:



The last thing. He is building himself a nice little collection of junk and clutter in his backyard. Our view of the beautiful city is tainted by what looks like a full time day care with all of these toys scattered about, a redneck stilt setup for stinging lights, rotting trellis work, things thrown up on his trellis and roof, raw wood exposed, :mad: It's absolutely terrible.



I kindly spoke to him about these matters a few weeks ago. He seems to have forgotten our conversation. Anyone have a bag of dog**** I can light on fire?
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So in other words you like HOAs and telling someone else what they can do with their piece of America? FAWK that. This entire thread was stated by someone too cheap to buy a cooling system for their house being pissed their neighbor's has a dog and chickens that provide them eggs for breakfast. Are you pissed their garden also brings bugs? Do their lights at Christmas irritate you? We're you pissed when they had friends and family come over and you had cars in front of your house you didn't recognize? The OP is a whiny ***** and should consider moving away from neighborhoods allowing pets, children, and trash cans. Honestly. Imagine if there is a forum of whiny ****s complaining of the stink of hot water and grains.
 
Rhumbline said:
Every time I hear someone go off about Home Owners Associations I think of stories like these. I'll gladly put up with restrictions if it means I don't have to live next to Jethro Bodine and the traveling circus.

As for the barking dogs, look into the local statutes. Unless you are in an unincorporated area there are usually codes that govern that. After I got on one of my neighbors about his dogs he trained them with one of those shock collars, it only took a couple weeks and they got the message.
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What if Jethro made his own beer and had his dog hang out while he brewed? Would he get an automatic pass because he brews? Would it make things different if he could brew 15 gallon batches and said you could use his system anytime as long as you provide yeast, grain, hops and beverages?
 
Heavenly said:
My neighbors latest assholeness.



We have a monthly street sweeper come by in our city. He always has a car or 2 of his parked on my curb so the curb doesn't get cleaned. Yesterday when he heard the sweeper coming he raced out and moved his 3rd car that he parks on the curb in front of his house over to my curb. His curb got nicely scrubbed, mine is a dirty mess now with 3 of his cars on it.



When he got out of his car after moving it I was yelling out my window at him. The sweeper was pretty loud so I don't think he caught most of what I was saying.
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Since when the **** do you own the street or sidewalk? It's public access. Yeah it's a dick move and yeah I'd consider loosening valve stems for this type of behavior however you don't own the road, the sidewalk, or even the access point in front of your driveway. I will mail you a shovel if you'll be less of a little whiny ***** over some snow. How long have you lived around this person? How long have you lived in snow? If you want to play games park your vehicle in front of his house and deal with warming up your car before work or STFU.
 
I don't think Santa Rosa gets much snow, just dirt & debris to sweep up. The last thing I want is somebody telling me I can't live how I want when I'm not hurting anybody else so I choose not to live in town. If I had other priorities I might live in town so that what goes on next door is to my liking. But, not everybody is in a position that they can freely choose to live where they best fit. Jethro is welcome to bring his hounds, cars and other stuff to my neck of the woods but I doubt he could find a decent job within an hour drive.
 
DurtyChemist said:
What if Jethro made his own beer and had his dog hang out while he brewed? Would he get an automatic pass because he brews? Would it make things different if he could brew 15 gallon batches and said you could use his system anytime as long as you provide yeast, grain, hops and beverages?
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no, it wouldn't. You don't **** in your own nest.
 
Hamaki said:
I don't think Santa Rosa gets much snow, just dirt & debris to sweep up. The last thing I want is somebody telling me I can't live how I want when I'm not hurting anybody else so I choose not to live in town. If I had other priorities I might live in town so that what goes on next door is to my liking. But, not everybody is in a position that they can freely choose to live where they best fit. Jethro is welcome to bring his hounds, cars and other stuff to my neck of the woods but I doubt he could find a decent job within an hour drive.
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Jethro might have grown up in the mirrors towns outside of Santa Rosa where you'd expect a Jethro to live but earned a scholarship to Stanford/Berkley/SF State/Davis/UCLA/etc and earned himself a degree where someone will pay him enough to commute around the North Bay. Even Tiburon has some people that don't drive a Mercedes or bike to work. What in the OP's post do that hurts anyone? Nothing. Yeast if the neighbor has lived there for 3 generations and the OP wanted to escape the city and bought a house in the new development built in the country where his neighbor who irritates him lived?
 
DurtyChemist said:
Jethro might have grown up in the mirrors towns outside of Santa Rosa where you'd expect a Jethro to live but earned a scholarship to Stanford/Berkley/SF State/Davis/UCLA/etc and earned himself a degree where someone will pay him enough to commute around the North Bay. Even Tiburon has some people that don't drive a Mercedes or bike to work. What in the OP's post do that hurts anyone? Nothing. Yeast if the neighbor has lived there for 3 generations and the OP wanted to escape the city and bought a house in the new development built in the country where his neighbor who irritates him lived?
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I squeezed real hard, but I couldn't get any English out of that...
 
Grannyknot said:
Maybe when the dog barks it is dog language for "will somebody please come over here and feed me some of that sweet nectar that is used to keep engines from freezing in the winter!!".
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That you would even suggest killing your neighbors dog removes any doubt in my mind who the bad neighbor actually is. You might find that killing a man's dog could put your own existence in danger.
 
Rhumbline said:
I squeezed real hard, but I couldn't get any English out of that...
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Maybe Jethro grew up outside of Santa Rosa, went to Stanford, earned an MBA, and now has a job in the North Bay and likes living in Santa Rosa with his dog. You said Jethro couldn't get a job within an hour of you but I can't imagine why what I said couldn't be possible.
 
DurtyChemist said:
Maybe Jethro grew up outside of Santa Rosa, went to Stanford, earned an MBA, and now has a job in the North Bay and likes living in Santa Rosa with his dog. You said Jethro couldn't get a job within an hour of you but I can't imagine why what I said couldn't be possible.
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Better.

I understood each of the individual words, and the sentence structure is recognizable as English, but I'll be damned if I know what you're talking about.

I thought maybe I drunk posted something about this mythical Jethro's employment opportunities but I went back and read each of my posts here and I can't find any reference to him finding work within an hour of me. I'm completely buggered as to why this would have any relevance to the topic even if it were true.
 
I'm the one not within an easy commute to good employment opportunities. It appears Jethro does not fit well in his current locale but may be a better fit near me. Expectations are different in my rural area vs OP's hood. My point is that even if Jethro's habits wouldn't be a problem in my area, I think that OP should be able to vent in his own thread about stuff in his own neighborhood without being called a whiny *****.
 
This thread only serves to confuse me more and more. I'm becoming more curious about this Jethro person...

Pilate: "He has a dog, you know?"
Pilate: "Would you like to know her name?"
(guard shakes his head)
Pilate: "She is called 'Incontinentia'... Incontinentia Buttocks"
 
I laughed attempting to read this 'chemist' guys posts. Absolutely fits the mold of an ******* neighbor. Probably 3rd grade education at most? Eh, just a guess but probably close.
 
My neighbor across the street parks his car on the street instead of in his driveway. He said it's so that nobody parks in front of his house. He also told me not to put our recyclable bottles and cans out at the curb on trash day because it attracts those "dirty Mexicans that will take over the neighborhood". Needless to say I still put them at the curb.
 
Rhumbline said:
This thread only serves to confuse me more and more. I'm becoming more curious about this Jethro person...

Pilate: "He has a dog, you know?"
Pilate: "Would you like to know her name?"
(guard shakes his head)
Pilate: "She is called 'Incontinentia'... Incontinentia Buttocks"
Click to expand...

I thought Incontinentia was his wife? Then again maybe she IS a b!tch.

Jethro, btw, is Moses' father-in-law, Elly May's cousin and inventor of the Bodine-O-Phone.
 
I'm convinced my neighbor absolutely hates his family or something. Wife and two kids, nice house, and the guy practically lives in his shed in his back yard. He has a little sofa, space heater, and TV hooked up in there and he's in there pretty much every single time I leave the house or come home. Morning, Afternoon, Night.

And it's not like it's a nice big garage, or bad ass little guest house...its really a shed normal people store their lawnmower and yard equipment in.

Oh, and he lets his dog bark all the time too...
 
I have a siren for a car alarm. Works on a 12 volt battery and is loud as eff. Thinking about wiring it up near my fence and his bedroom. Aim it right at his room. Maybe a little juice at 2am for about 5 seconds. Try to find a way to remote it to my phone so I can activate from there.

With dumb people, you have to fight fire with fire or let them shyt on you.
 
That will just make it worse. Eventually someone will end up shooting someone else. I've seen it on 20/20 a million times.

Why don't you just fill out a bunch of magazine subscriptions in his name? You could have 20 pizzas delivered to his house at 10PM? That's old school harassment - and nobody gets hurt (except for the pizza guy who doesn't get paid for 20 pizzas.). :D
 
b-boy said:
That will just make it worse. Eventually someone will end up shooting someone else. I've seen it on 20/20 a million times.

Why don't you just fill out a bunch of magazine subscriptions in his name? You could have 20 pizzas delivered to his house at 10PM? That's old school harassment - and nobody gets hurt (except for the pizza guy who doesn't get paid for 20 pizzas.). :D
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How does a siren hurt anyone? Ordering pizzas is worse than that.
 
I had those neighbors until I moved this summer. Guy had 4 cars of his own and constantly had people over. Street was always packed with cars and their low rider trucks. They went as far as to park in front of our house and block my driveway on a weekday! Up all hours of the night 7 days a week. Music blaring, yelling...screaming...revving their two stroke dirtbike up...you name it, they did it. They were always home too...I dont think either of them worked. Maybe they had a trust or worked from home...I don't know...but they sucked.


I was born and raised in Healdsburg btw! Sonoma County brethren!
 

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