I had to cut my pee tree down

And now the grape bush is going to take a beating I fear. My wife cannot understand why I will walk past the bathroom and go outside to pee. I think it is a territory thing my self but she claims I just try writing my name in the snow

Most girls don't understand. There is a certain feeling of freedom and 'back to nature' sense about peeing outside. Me? I don't have a particular plant, but I have been known to walk behind the house or garage and water the various growth in the 'ditch' that separates my property from the neighbor's.

It's like that song by Lee Greenwood... sort of...

I'm proud to be an American!
Where at least I know I'm free,
To step right out the back door
whip it out and take a pee.

There should be some more, but I haven't tried to think of more lyrics for years.

I cut down my pee oak, now I use the stump. I imagine I'm quickening the reduction of the stump to nature, but not sure.

Varmintman said:

And now the grape bush is going to take a beating I fear. My wife cannot understand why I will walk past the bathroom and go outside to pee. I think it is a territory thing my self but she claims I just try writing my name in the snow

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well tell you wife she only needs to be concerned if you star smelling random stranger butts.

God made trees so we can pee on them

I think they are just jealous that we can write in the snow and all they can do is make a puddle.

Winter is a great thing. Every time it snows I get a nice new clean canvas to practice on

My pee tree blew down in a storm last summer. I hauled away all of the brush, but part of it remains sticking up out of the ground. I haven't decided if I'll keep it.... you might say "I'm stumped!"

There's nothing like a proper pee tree 10 steps away from the beer patio!

Here I thought I was the only one who preferred peeing outside. I guess its a beer drinking thing but I've lived in the country my entire life and it comes natural. I usually pee off the back deck, just whip it out between the rails and let er rip!

Now that I am married I have to walk over to the grape bush. Weird being married.

I think it is a country boy thing more or less. Always outside working so you just let fly

Varmintman said:

Now that I am married I have to walk over to the grape bush. Weird being married.

I think it is a country boy thing more or less. Always outside working so you just let fly

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I used to pee on the tree in front of my apartment in Vegas. during the day.

If she planted said grape bush you are playing with fire.

My wife has seen me pee in the yard in broad daylight and she was perfectly fine with it as long as I stayed away from her flowers!

Just tell her it will keep the deer away, or whatever nuisance animal gets her plants

My back yard borders a fairly busy county road, and the front yard is a cul-de-sac with an elderly lady that likes to keep an eye on me, so my backyard whizzing is limited to late night when I can see headlights a ways off. But every now and then, I piss on one side of the tree while the dog waters the other side.

Back in HS I took a wilderness canoe trip in southern Minnesota. Even the girls were practicing writing their names in the sand. (That HAD to take some acrobatics...) Couple of us almost got into trouble the one day we went in to town...the urge hit, walk up to a plant in the middle of main street and reach for the zipper when you think "Wait... I probably shouldn't do this here...."

Had a small palm(knee high) right outside the back door that took many a yellow shower...it died.

And I am trying to kill the grape bush. Going to have to wait though for spring to see if it worked.

I bet there are many more tree killers here on the forum

Varmintman said:

Now that I am married I have to walk over to the grape bush. Weird being married.

I think it is a country boy thing more or less. Always outside working so you just let fly

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Here in Jersey we use fire hydrants

Had a raccoon problem with my pond and somebody mentioned urine keeps them away. Started peeing wth purpose then, to save my fish. Funny thing is, haven't had a raccoon visit since. Although now I am dealing with a blue heron that evidently isn't put off by my pee. Thing has an 8 foot wing span and bolts before I can toss a rock at it. Ugly bird up close.

tell your wife to "pop a squat" herself outside and see how liberating it is

In college my we usually drank at my friends place, for some reason the only bathroom in his apt was on the 2nd floor. Bad idea in a college town. So we designated a outdoor urinal, by the time 2 years was past there was a 10 foot circle with no grass growing in it.

Maybe I should work on the ivy growing around the fir tree in the front.

It's a big patch of ivy, but piss is free, most of it goes to waste and roundup costs money.

Hmmm..... maybe not.
I've got a couple good dogs buried under that tree and it's just not right to pee on a friends grave.
Not that they never crapped in my house, but still.

Urine will absolutely KILL vegetation if done in the same spot frequently. This is why I alternate my pee spots in the yard, mark the fence...at night, perhaps even wonder over to the neighbor's property and help him with his dry grass problem.

Jayhem said:

Urine will absolutely KILL vegetation if done in the same spot frequently. This is why I alternate my pee spots in the yard, mark the fence...at night, perhaps even wonder over to the neighbor's property and help him with his dry grass problem.

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you are a pro!

And here I thought I was strange

I thought this was going to be about self mutilation.

Zuljin said:

I thought this was going to be about self mutilation.

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I "liked", then laughed some more. Gawd that's funny. I'm still laughing to myself.

Zuljin said:

I thought this was going to be about self mutilation.

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Ha! Dog came over to see what I'm laughing at.

Grandsons would come over and first words out of their mouths were" Grandpa can we pea in the yard". "Yeah" says I. Their mom would freak.