Caught in the Act

After drinking one too many Arrogant Bastards, I decided that instead of heading for the bathroom, I'd just stumble into the garage and pee into one of my keggles. SWMBO caught me mid pee, and told me she'd never never drink my beer again.

More for me, I guess...

Anyone else pee into their HLT?

haha. thats funny as ****. why the **** did you pee in your keggle? this made me lol

Er, in short: no.

oh yeah. also no.

No, that's why I have a sink in the garage...duh!

rycov said:

haha. thats funny as ****. why the **** did you pee in your keggle? this made me lol

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It seemed like an alright idea at the time I thought about telling SWMBO that she had finally discovered the secret to my light lagers, but realized all too soon after the bathroom lecture she gave me, that that probably wasn't a good idea.

you should pee in your kegerator now. you know, to even out your system

I pee in my basement sink, but I don't make beer in there...

rycov said:

you should pee in your kegerator now. you know, to even out your system

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I should work on counter pressure filling an entire keg with pee, for unwanted guests and whatnot!

What is wrong with the damn grass? Fercrissakes, people. Why do you want to collect and store your own urine?

you were making BMC in you HLT and got caught?

Batinse said:

What is wrong with the damn grass? Fercrissakes, people. Why do you want to collect and store your own urine?

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...

Patches O'Houlihan said:

Because it's sterile, and I like the taste!

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Hello Brew Force, I am a therapist and I think I can help you with your fear of bathrooms. Here is my number, call me.

867-5309

Oh my God this is the best drunken post ever. This is something I can see me doing. lol

That said, I would go outside to pee... but my next garage will have a built in urinal.

Note to self: NO beer swaps with Brew Force!

The Admin needs to put a note in this guys signature which cannot be removed to ensure that no one swaps with him.

gratus fermentatio said:

Note to self: NO beer swaps with Brew Force!

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Ditto!

BrewForce is now on the NON-APPROVED list.

When i lived in the barracks i woke up and peed into my roomates lettice drawer in the fridge... drunken pee stories are always funny

Buddy of mine was so drunk one night that he had passed out in his lazy boy. I was sleeping on his couch and in the middle of the night woke up to him peeing in the middle of the living room. Once he was done he went back to bed in the lazy boy. The next morning I told him what I had witnessed, and he said that he thought that he was outside peeing.

kosmokramer said:

When i lived in the barracks i woke up and peed into my roomates lettice drawer in the fridge... drunken pee stories are always funny

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You weren't by chance stationed at camp Pendleton were you? My room mate did the same damn thing.

kosmokramer said:

When i lived in the barracks i woke up and peed into my roomates lettice drawer in the fridge... drunken pee stories are always funny

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When I went to Kosovo the first time, the SGM took one of our guys as his driver to go to a "party" at one of the SF team houses we were supporting. My boy got so drunk, he peed on the SGM's uniform which was on the floor next to his bunk.

The next day, my friend dug the best fighting position I've ever seen, 5.5 feet deep and almost 10 feet wide. For the rest of the deployment, we used it as a burn pit. Anyone who's ever dug a fighting position should know how much fun my friend had that day

Don't think I'll be trying any of your Bud clones...

There is a reason God put shrubs and small trees on the ground.

As for me, I have a second bathroom. lol

Speaking of drunken pee stories, my brother while in the military on leave in Germany got REAL drunk and pissed all over his white macbook laptop! He tried to pass it off as water damage. They didn't believe him. haha

My friends aren't allowed to sleepover my house.

One of them pissed on my girlfriend's best friend, the other pissed all over the couch ... my friends are not housebroken, apparently.

I was in a friend's diner and we were trashed (right?). I woke up in the middle of the night and lost my way to the restroom. I did find some sort of produce tote in the basement (where i was walking in eight foot circles trying to find the door) and i pissed for what seemed like hours right there in that tote.

I did return before anyone had a chance to have lettice that was sprinkled with Swifty Essince and threw the contents away. I didnt understand drunken piss stories till then. How that i'm in the club i'm prosting the **** outta this thread!

Posted from a phone 4 beers in.

Swifty said:

Posted from a phone 4 beers in.

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4 beers deep by 9:30 am! I would say your well on your way to another drunken piss story!

I took a cab home from the city one night totally wasted, and broke. Had the cabbie stop by an ATM, but was so hammered I couldn't remember my pin. After trying for a couple minutes, the urge hit, so I peed in a waste paper basket in the bank. The cabbie called the cops and they were so nice to put me up for the night.

maffewl said:

Don't think I'll be trying any of your Bud clones...

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At least it will have the authentic taste...

8 years ago at a fraternity retreat in a huge cabin out in the middle of nowhere complete with 40 bunk beds we were all hammered. Before I passed out I drew a map in my head as to how to get to the bathroom. Well when it got dark, I couldn't see a damn thing. First trip, I pissed all over the wall. The urinals were on the other side of said wall. Then couldn't find my bed so I got in the nearest unoccupied one. 2nd trip I didn't know where the hell I was to begin with, and decided instead of walkin around I just got up and pissed all over the bed and then moved to another bed.

Woke up the next morning on the opposite side of the room to people complaining about piss all over the place. No one (unless any are reading this thread) knows who it was.

Barnzy02 said:

One of them pissed on my girlfriend's best friend...

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First, how in the world did that unfold? "hold still a minute while I whip it out and relieve myself on your shoe..."

Second, time for new friends perhaps???

In high school my brother and I shared a room. He stumbled home drunk one night and passed out. While I was still up watching TV, he awoke, walked up to his own dresser, with the top drawer open, and took a piss all over his own clothes. I couldn't wake him with yells for a good 45 seconds while he just soaked his own stuff. He had no idea what he was doing and seemed to be basically sleepwalking. Pretty funny for me but he had a pretty bad morning.

cimirie said:

First, how in the world did that unfold? "hold still a minute while I whip it out and relieve myself on your shoe..."

Second, time for new friends perhaps???

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HA, Yeah it probably is time for new friends.

They were asleep on a futon together, and at some point in the night he just let it flow. He woke up in the middle of the night, realized he pissed all over himself, her, and my futon and then ran out of the house before anyone woke up. He was scared to come back the next day, still hasn't lived it down ... and probably never will.

Brew_Force said:

After drinking one too many Arrogant Bastards, I decided that instead of heading for the bathroom, I'd just stumble into the garage and pee into one of my keggles. SWMBO caught me mid pee, and told me she'd never never drink my beer again.

More for me, I guess...

Anyone else pee into their HLT?

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No. I just go outside if I want a new care free pee environment.

Wolfhound180 said:

You weren't by chance stationed at camp Pendleton were you? My room mate did the same damn thing.

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Goodfellow afb, san angelo tx. Makes ne feel better im not the only one who gas done this...lol

In my garage I have a milk jug labelled: URNL

Maybe next year I'll rig a real one that flows out the back wall.

This is a very good actual drunken rambling!

One time I passed out in a friend's bathroom. I broke his kid's foot stool. Luckily I had just tucked it away when it happened.

Homercidal said:

In my garage I have a milk jug labelled: URNL

Maybe next year I'll rig a real one that flows out the back wall.

This is a very good actual drunken rambling!

One time I passed out in a friend's bathroom. I broke his kid's foot stool. Luckily I had just tucked it away when it happened.

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Just some ideas for you.

I can control my piss, but when I get super drunk. I sometimes vomit, and usually do not make it to the bathroom. :cross:

Its been years since, but man there is nothing worse than waking up hung over to the stench of vomit in the house.

Unfortunately, that was me a few years back also. I've never pissed anywhere I didn't choose to though, and never anyplace worse than behind a building or dumpster.