Fake troll thread titles - give us your best!!

Don't fear the foam, does that mean don't fear the Oxyclean foam?

I wanna make a good American pilsner just like Guinness; recipe please?

Sorry for the bump, but a possible troller the other day got me to thinking. With one easy post you can troll people in a geographic location (call them idiots) AND piss off brewers in one fell swoop.

"Greetings from Boston! Like I was told, I jammed my bunghole reemer into my bunghole. I had to do an extended stay in the hospital, and I still have no wine! Help pls! Serious responses only."

I know, I know; https://www.homebrewtalk.com/f29/mission-help-more-people-homebrew-361965/

NordeastBrewer77 said:

I know, I know; https://www.homebrewtalk.com/f29/mission-help-more-people-homebrew-361965/

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Do you think that one was a troll? I left that thread feeling bad for the kid honestly. "Ass juice?" pretty mean. You, Revvy, and Homer gave honest constructive crit, but I just saw a young man with all the wind taken out of his sails (and sales) looking deflated on the other end...

CreamyGoodness said:

Do you think that one was a troll? I left that thread feeling bad for the kid honestly. "Ass juice?" pretty mean. You, Revvy, and Homer gave honest constructive crit, but I just saw a young man with all the wind taken out of his sails (and sales) looking deflated on the other end...

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C'mon Creamy......that's like taking whiffle ball bats to spring training and expecting to revolutionize baseball. Dissapointment is inevitable. If I was that dissolusioned, I would want someone to tell me the truth.

BBL_Brewer said:

C'mon Creamy......that's like taking whiffle ball bats to spring training and expecting to revolutionize baseball. Dissapointment is inevitable. If I was that dissolusioned, I would want someone to tell me the truth.

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Oh I agree. It was the ass-juice comment that made me feel sympathy. Enthusiasm is a good thing, even when its misplaced. No need to pee on the boxer when you knock him out.

CreamyGoodness said:

Oh I agree. It was the ass-juice comment that made me feel sympathy. Enthusiasm is a good thing, even when its misplaced. No need to pee on the boxer when you knock him out.

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Point taken.

Due to the hijack, I guess we better get back on topic.

My beer unfermented, should I use yeast next time instead of malt?

CreamyGoodness said:

Do you think that one was a troll? I left that thread feeling bad for the kid honestly. "Ass juice?" pretty mean. You, Revvy, and Homer gave honest constructive crit, but I just saw a young man with all the wind taken out of his sails (and sales) looking deflated on the other end...

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I did, at first, kinda wonder if the guy was for real. But, yeah, probably not. I saw his last post, and am trying to think of something that that contraption could be useful for. Starters? Small fermenter? Anything with instructions that don't involve juice, and involve a recipe for beer wort.


Cr@p, I went back to that thread to give the guy some advice about things like I mentioned, had a 3 paragraph post and Muncher closed it for unlicensed promo before I could post.

CONFUSED: "all grain" recipe calls for hops, yeast

NordeastBrewer77 said:

Cr@p, I went back to that thread to give the guy some advice about things like I mentioned, had a 3 paragraph post and Muncher closed it for unlicensed promo before I could post.

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yeah i had a few thoughts for him/her too, but the thread was closed while i was composing my reply. i PM'ed him my post instead.

I'm from Borneo, there is no drinking age here. Help me celebrate my 13th birthday by showing me how to make Goldschlagger!

sweetcell said:

yeah i had a few thoughts for him/her too, but the thread was closed while i was composing my reply. i PM'ed him my post instead.

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Same. Though I didnt PM. Think the kid could use that thing for SOMETHING?

sweetcell said:

yeah i had a few thoughts for him/her too, but the thread was closed while i was composing my reply. i PM'ed him my post instead.

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Exactly what I did, and I figured I wasn't the only one.

CreamyGoodness said:

Same. Though I didnt PM. Think the kid could use that thing for SOMETHING?

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Agreed. There's gotta be some sort of use for that, just not hooch.

What is the best beer style to get a 12 year old girl drunk?

LMAO! I never expected that fake title to get a "Like"

That's ok, I never expected Txbrew to yearn for one of your paintings.

Something just flew past my head and made a zing sound.

First time cooking meth, am I using the right decongestant?

edds5p0 said:

First time cooking meth, am I using the right decongestant?

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More hops and decongestant, call it an imperial meth?

TyTanium said:

Here's the thread for those that missed it:
https://www.homebrewtalk.com/f45/forgot-key-ingredient-does-matter-much-280208/

Instant classic.

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missed that 1. couldn't stop laughing reading it just now

laughing_gnome_invisible said:

something just flew past my head and made a zing sound.

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My bad....next time I'll lobb it to ya

Some dude told us he used urine as a sanitizer.

EDIT: Here it is: https://www.homebrewtalk.com/f13/first-time-no-sanitizer-peed-14423/

Laughing_Gnome_Invisible said:

What is the best beer style to get a 12 year old girl drunk?

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Smirnoff Ice® Cherry Lime

Laughing_Gnome_Invisible said:

LMAO! I never expected that fake title to get a "Like"

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kinda disturbing, actually...

sweetcell said:

kinda disturbing, actually...

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I thought it was disturbing when I typed it, but I typed it anyway. I would be untrue to myself if I suddenly started displaying good taste and judgement.

"The Last Word: Do YOU Secondary??"

My fermenter has little bubbles coming from it. Is this an infection?

A drunken necromancer resurrects...

Is it ok to primary in the secondary?

I see this is an old thread, but I missed it first time around.

"I drank thirteen homebrews and have a splitting headache!"

"How do I add the hops?"

There were also real threads on here about brewing with a placenta and cremated remains...

Which one is best for a lager, Active or Rapid Rise?

Well, it's not rapid. Lager takes a long time.

You need inactive yeast for a lager.

What is the best type of toilet bowl to make Ed Wort's Apfelwein in?

I think my DME is crushed too finely. Half of it went right through the grain bag.

Planning to boost my abv, how many ounces of hops should I add to get an extra 3%?

As I was weighing out my grain last night, I thought of a good one.

"Making first all grain brew. Crushed each grain with my hand. There's got to be a better way!"

Oh and also, this was a real thread....pretty sure it was a joke though. I got a good laugh.

https://www.homebrewtalk.com/f14/out-co2-primed-keg-propane-331181/

gcdowd said:

Oh and also, this was a real thread....pretty sure it was a joke though. I got a good laugh.

https://www.homebrewtalk.com/f14/out-co2-primed-keg-propane-331181/

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Classic!!