Alcoholism and Avatars

Another thread reminded me of something that has occasionally bothered me. Many of us try to be funny with our avatars, signatures and taglines. Sometimes, I'll see one that specifically refers to being an alcoholic. I'm not talking about references to being drunk, but specifically to being an alcoholic.

My two cents is that folks need to think through whether that's funny or not. To me, it's like joking about cancer - generally, usually, not funny. Alcoholism is a horrible affliction with devastating impact on the alcoholic and often the children and loved ones. Again, not funny.

To be clear, brewing and alcoholism are not related - we brewers are not responsible for those who suffer with alcoholism. Just as cooks are not responsible for those who are dangerously obese.

But joking about alcoholism just isn't funny to me.

I'm not sure what avatar brought us to this discussion, I have to confess I usually don't pay alot of attention to them. (Now I'll have to be on the lookout..). I too agree that alcoholism, or any addiction, for that mater isn't funny. Many a life (besides the addicts) have been destroyed because of this behavior. It's sorta the same as the way the word 'retard' is thrown about. It's funny (to some people) until it's said it to someone with a mentally challenged child. That being said, some people may be trying to cover a problem or maybe hiding some pain behind humor. While it may seem 'dark humor'....it is humor none the less. Then again....it may be just a case of someone being ignorant...or just simply being an ass.....

My dad was an alcoholic and died in a car on the way home from a bar. My Mom is a recovering alcoholic and addict.

Personally, I am able to laugh about alcoholism in this setting. It's a deep personal thing in my life but when it comes to forums, I just take it all lightly.

Beyond that, my brothers and I are always aware that there was something in our parents that we may inherited. I tread lightly when it comes to consuming alcohol because to be honest, I love it, I love the taste, I love the flavors, I love the smell and I love how it makes me feel. But because of all of that I have always stayed away from the party scene and I drink lightly, only.

Brewing is a fun hobby that allows me to have some fun making something I and my family will consume.

In real life alcoholism is no joke.

Its a joke; and a bad joke at that....
but i really ive got way more offensive jokes than that

I agree that alcoholism isn't the least bit funny, nor is cancer.

But my coping mechanism is humor. As a child who lost a parent to breast cancer, and one parent to alcoholism, I considered myself an orphan even though one parent was actually still alive through my teen years. My friends thought I was a comedian, I was so funny. That was how I coped.

I still deal with difficult times in my life (serious illness, deaths, divorce) with humor. Maybe me being in a wheelchair for 18 months was the worst experience of my life- or maybe it was a very painful divorce. But the ability to joke about it and make fun of the experiences gave me what little control I had over the situations. I think that handling it with humor is the only way to not go crazy.

To each their own. Just because someone else has it out there, it doesn't mean that you have to look at it.

That's what the ignore list is for.

Thanks for the thoughtful responses.

Pappers said:

To be clear, brewing and alcoholism are not related - we brewers are not responsible for those who suffer with alcoholism. Just as cooks are not responsible for those who are dangerously obese.

But joking about alcoholism just isn't funny to me.

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Not arguing the subject, but I bet most everyone laughs at fat joke, but I bet there are a lot of people out there that find fat jokes offensive. A funny joke is a funny joke ... regardless of the topic. You know, everyone is going to find something offensive.

My first wife was an alcoholic. Please feel free to joke about her as much as you like.

Sure, but that doesn't mean we don't individually draw boundaries. I didn't suggest that there be rules here about references to alcoholism, just that individuals think about whether it's funny or not. Some people find misogony hilarious, but I wouldn't post a joke on a public forum about humiliating women.

Again, thanks for the thoughtful responses, that's all I was hoping to engender.

srm775 said:

Not arguing the subject, but I bet most everyone laughs at fat joke, but I bet there are a lot of people out there that find fat jokes offensive. A funny joke is a funny joke ... regardless of the topic. You know, everyone is going to find something offensive.

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Laughing_Gnome_Invisible said:

My first wife was an alcoholic. Please feel free to joke about her as much as you like.

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As always, you do make me LOL!

I agree it's not a funny disease but a joke is a joke. Especially when it's delivered in the last place an alcoholic should be hanging out. I'm not going to censor anything nor should anything be censored because "someone might get offended" or "get their feelings hurt".

Have to agree with FlashRedGLS18T, even though my father's father died from it. My father never touched alcohol, except communion wine, and died at 47.

While I was in the Navy, we had a rule in the wardroom: Fat guys could tell fat jokes, bald guys, bald jokes, and only the Commanding Officer could tell old jokes.

Pappers said:

Sure, but that doesn't mean we don't individually draw boundaries. I didn't suggest that there be rules here about references to alcoholism, just that individuals think about whether it's funny or not. Some people find misogony hilarious, but I wouldn't post a joke on a public forum about humiliating women.

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My rule of thumb is that if you can't laugh at those less fortunate that you, then who can you laugh at?

My dad died as a result of alcoholism, but I also don't get offended at alcoholic jokes. I have too much to do in this life to spend it being offended at something.

If you want to push it to the limit one can say that nothing in life is funny.

So, saying AA is for quitters...Suicide is for successful people...People with Alzheimers meeet new people everyday...Gravity sucks...is a lie?

Everyone of these jokes, while they may be in bad taste to one are funny as hell to another, but in the end they are nothing but pure REALITY...ergo, life is funny...???

Again, thanks for the thoughtful comments. And life *is* funny, thank goodness!

I think the difference between cancer jokes and alcoholic jokes is that, well, if you have cancer, you have cancer. Alcoholism is a lot more subjective and is often used as an unfair judgement of someon'e lifestyle. For that reason, many people will just hold their hands up and joke about being an alcoholic simply to pre-empt malicious jibes from the judgemental.

It is simply easier to make light of alcoholism.

Eg: "Hey Fred, I see you are drinking more than I do." Fred holds up his hand and says, "Ya got me. I'm an alcoholic. I come from a long line of alcoholics and horse theives, it's in my genes"

or: "Hey Fred, I see you cough a lot more than I do" Fred holds up his hand and says. "Ya got me. I got the ol' lung cancer. Both my parents and my brother died from it. It's in my genes....That and the horse stealing thing i do."

Now, one of those responses is slightly less unfunny than the other. The reason being is that cancer is an absolute, while alcoholism is open to debate and is a handy tool for the self righteous to use against others.


Edit: On reflection, I may have got that wrong. I think the cancer response is funnier. I didn't plan it that way, but then I have VERY bad taste.

I'm pretty sick of political correctness and worrying about offending people. I joke about being an alcoholic all the time and have no plans to quit simply because someone else can't get a handle on their problem. I also joke about being overweight and *slightly* balding. If that offends some overweight bald alcoholic, well then he/she isn't far enough into denial.

I'm an insensitive bastard.

Fingers said:

I'm pretty sick of political correctness and worrying about offending people. I joke about being an alcoholic all the time and have no plans to quit simply because someone else can't get a handle on their problem. I also joke about being overweight and *slightly* balding. If that offends some overweight bald alcoholic, well then he/she isn't far enough into denial.

I'm an insensitive bastard.

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A guy walked into a bar. He asked the barman for a whisky. The barman asked "How many fingers?"..... Fingers said "Give me ten shots, I'm a fat bald alcoholic."

Yeah, that needs work, I know.:cross:

I hate to sound too gauche here (which means I'm about to), but brewers and drinkers need to have thick skin. For one reason or another, we like to tell tall tales about drinking adventures and habits, we often brag and laugh about drinking to the point of stumbling, doing stupid things, or even blacking out. We also tend to test or even cross the line of good taste, whether due to alcohol or not, and many brewers are the sort that like to rock the boat just to see how the folks inside respond.

That said, there is a time and place for such things, and this is that time and place. I don't condone pure political correctness anymore than I condone intentionally or knowingly offending others. I imagine most of us around here understand why both extremes are bad ideas. I also imagine most of us have enough sense not to head over to an AA sort of board and start signing off posts with



Good topic to discuss, Pappers.


TL

We get complaints about risque avatars as well. We essentially stick to the standard that if it can appear in a Victoria Secret catalog or be on 9PM network TV, we'll let it go.

We sometimes get complaints about political avatars and signatures. We feel that those subjects are not permitted in the general forum, so they should not be permitted as avatars or signatures.

If your avatar or signature becomes more important than what you post around here, it might be wise to change that before it becomes a distraction.

Cancer is not funny, but you are you going to do? I think the best thing is to laugh about stuff. Yooper is right. Humour can be very therapeutic. not everyone has the same sense of humour, so you never really know when you might offend someone.

I personally know a few fat people and generally enjoy fat jokes. I also know a few retards, and enjoy retard jokes. The retards know they have a disability of a certain type and also know that I care about them. It probably took a long time for them to get over the stigma, but they know who they are, and that this is a part of who they are. Just like a guy I knew who had a twitchy arm. We called him Twitch.

Now I don't go around just cracking jokes about them in front of them, but at least I can enjoy the random fat joke now and again and not feel bad. We all have our little disabilities. Some you just have to look a bit deeper down for.

Laughing_Gnome_Invisible said:

Fingers said "Give me ten shots, I'm a fat bald alcoholic."

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Great. A little while ago it was a hypothetical situation and I could play big and tough. Now that the reality is here, I think I'm going to cry myself to sleep tonight.

You're a big meanie, LKI.

Fingers said:

Great. A little while ago it was a hypothetical situation and I could play big and tough. Now that the reality is here, I think I'm going to cry myself to sleep tonight.

You're a big meanie, LKI.

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And you're old, too.

*sniff* Thanks, Yooper. You give him hell, girl.

His mama still dresses him funny, too!!! Back on the special bus!!!

Fingers said:

Great. A little while ago it was a hypothetical situation and I could play big and tough. Now that the reality is here, I think I'm going to cry myself to sleep tonight.

You're a big meanie, LKI.

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LOL Fingers is such a fat balding alcoholic he can't even spell "LGI"

Or is that supposed to be Laughing Knome Invisible.

I have tried to be politically correct but the stick kept falling out.

dontman said:

LOL Fingers is such a fat balding alcoholic he can't even spell "LGI"

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Isn't the K silent in Gnome?

So silent it is invisible. Just like in Alc(k)oholic.

Fingers said:

. . . overweight bald alcoholic, well then he/she isn't far enough into denial.

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And in the immortal words of the late great Curly Howard: "hey, I resemble that remark. nyuk, nyuk, nyuk."

I believe I was the one that got people thinking about this, in all seriousness while I do have a dad that is an alcoholic that is in rehab I'm not offended by the occasional alcoholic joke. Sure it's a sore spot for me right now but that being said I'm a pretty humorous guy so bring on the jokes I can take it.

Is your Dad fat and *slightly* balding?

farmbrewernw said:

while I do have a dad that is an alcoholic

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Just the one? Boom boom!

Someone stop me please.