Cheyco said:On thinking about it, I think the worst question SWMBO asked was "What the hell are you doing in our bed with her!!!"
Not to bad if she follows that with "I was supposed to go first!"
Cheyco said:On thinking about it, I think the worst question SWMBO asked was "What the hell are you doing in our bed with her!!!"
dancingbarefoot said:Pfffft! Sure...
RichBrewer said:"What do you think of her" as you are walking down the street and she points to another lady. I don't think there is an answer that will keep you out of trouble.
Possibly "what lady? I didn't notice her". But that won't even work because she knows you are lying.
How about "What are you thinking about?" An all-time classic.
I can do better than that,he's on his way over with a ups stamp on his ass,oh just one favour to ask.If he's still got my stilleto stick'in out of his head,tell him to send it back or he's gona get a bill!Cheyco said:Sounds like my kind of bloke. Gimme his email so we can compare notes!
My reply to this varies with what I want for the night . . .
If I want to be left alone
"I was just thinking about <insert any Quantum Theroy hypothisys here>
I prefer Schrodinger's Cat, but just about any one of them works
" I was wondering if <what ever you just ate here> has milk in it and if I took my lactaid . . .
100% NO FAIL
If I want to "get some"
"I was thinking about that Arbys comercial (the fishnet stockings one)"
/shrug I dunno but it works for now
If I want to just get some sleep
"I was wondering how long those shoes have been over there and when Dewd is gonna eat them"
pisses her off to the point she wont talk to me
If I want to go to the bar
"<insert random females name here>"
This one usually ends up with me sleeping at the firehouse . . . .
Normal Response . . . and usually the safest
"Huh?"
When SWMBO asks me what I'm thinking about I usually tell her that I'm thinking i want to insert my (pick your favorite appendage) into her (pick your favorite orifice)
This either gets me lucky, or makes her leave the room quickly. Either way, I win :rockin:
Ooh, I get this one a lot, only it's phrased, "Do you have plans for tomorrow?"How about the phrase, 'What do you want to do tomorrow?'
The translation is, 'I have something specific I want to do tomorrow and you have to guess. You have one shot. Go.'
Or, then there's the corollary: "Does this dress make me look fat?"
On the flip side, how many men would ever ask their SWMBO "Do these pants make my junk look bigger?"
You don't need a swmbo to use that line; just ask a guy friend after a few brews.
Make sure you have a camera ready so you can forever capture the horrified look on the poor guy's face.
Enter your email address to join: