Wife sabotaged beers

[MileHighBrewer]

have a home brew and some extra spicy wings. get intimate, don't wash your hands. quid pro quo.

 

[PackerfaninSanDiego]

seeing the OP brought his marriage problems to a beer forum, the floor is open?

 

[Gar]

The first rule of survival: "Never go to bed with anyone crazier than yourself."

A rule which men almost universally seem to break, by the way...

Amen my brother

 

[GuldTuborg]

There's a thread for you on here, OP. Believe it's called "Messin' with SWMBO."

 

[GuldTuborg]

seeing the OP brought his marriage problems to a beer forum, the floor is open?

I see no reason to have mercy.

 

[Gar]

I just gotta say it if she is a person who will sabotage your beer with flowers what else may she have put in there? as crazy as people get these days watch your azz.

 

[seabass07]

Divorce. Pee in her shoes.

 

[Schlenkerla]

My wife doesn't like my brewing but would not sabatoge it. I brew on my own budget.

If she did, the house budget would be be buying me a stainless rig and it would be drop shipped to my new home.

In the mean... I mean, mean time. I'd be tempted to mess up her stuff.
1) Every piece of her clothing would have a hole or cigarette burn in it.
2) I'd grab every pair of high heel shoes she owns and saw 1/2" off the heel on just one shoe.
3) I'd bust at least one hook on each of her bras after i put odorless bengay on the left D cup.
4) I'd put nair in her shampoo
5) I'd dip all of of the light bulbs in garlic juice then screw them back into the sockets.
6) I stuff fresh shrimp inside the curtain rods in the living room.
7) I'd put her work email address on every porn website that I could find.
8) I'd make sure I have mobile remote control of her xfinity cable box with it set to record WWF wresting on PPV only during prime time.
9) I'd use facesniff to post MILF & Sugar Daddy's links on her Facebook Wall.
10) I'd brew beer on my new rig and think of some other crap to do to her.

 

[FatDragon]

Seems to think I love beer more than her. I'll ride it out and see what happens.

I feel your pain. I started brewing in October, about a month and a half after the fiancee (now wife) moved into my apartment. She's tremendously proud of my beer, brags about it to her friends, shares it with friends' husbands and encourages me to keep enough of it in stock to drink and share around. But she hates brew day, bottling day, and bottle cleaning day (when I get a new load in from the bar where I get my bottles). I try to do those things when she's out of the house or sleeping in on the weekends, but she inevitably comes home/wakes up in the middle of the process and wants me to drop everything to spend time with her, which can't really be done as brewing and bottling are pretty time-sensitive once you begin the process.

The most obvious solution is to give her enough love and attention when you're not brewing that she doesn't feel betrayed or ignored when you're stuck in a process that can't wait. Unfortunately, if your wife is as needy as mine can get at times, sometimes it means you're just gonna have to absorb some pouty looks and verbal abuse once in a while . Whatever you do, know your wife, know your relationship, and keep both of them well; beer is great, but some things are even more important than the almighty pint.

 

[Schlenkerla]

I feel your pain. I started brewing in October, about a month and a half after the fiancee (now wife) moved into my apartment. She's tremendously proud of my beer, brags about it to her friends, shares it with friends' husbands and encourages me to keep enough of it in stock to drink and share around. But she hates brew day, bottling day, and bottle cleaning day (when I get a new load in from the bar where I get my bottles). I try to do those things when she's out of the house or sleeping in on the weekends, but she inevitably comes home/wakes up in the middle of the process and wants me to drop everything to spend time with her, which can't really be done as brewing and bottling are pretty time-sensitive once you begin the process.

The most obvious solution is to give her enough love and attention when you're not brewing that she doesn't feel betrayed or ignored when you're stuck in a process that can't wait. Unfortunately, if your wife is as needy as mine can get at times, sometimes it means you're just gonna have to absorb some pouty looks and verbal abuse once in a while . Whatever you do, know your wife, know your relationship, and keep both of them well; beer is great, but some things are even more important than the almighty pint.

Good Advice... some I could've taken myself years ago.... although it think its too late for me. She hates it and anything that involves the sharing of it.

 

[Aonghus]

So my wife decided to add a few flower pedals to 2 beers I have fermenting for Heritage Fest in St. Louis in June (not for experimenting reasons but instead, cause she was pissed at me). Ones been sitting for 1 wk and has since finished fermenting and the other is at 2 wks. I sanitized a utensil and scooped them out and resanitized the lids and air locks. Anyone else have their beers sabotaged? And should I be ok? They were in there for 30 mins to an hour.

You need to find out what kind of flowers she used. There are some commonly used garden flowers that are hella poisonous: Hellabore, Monkshood etc…
I would probably filter my beer through her best sweater for something like that.

 

[chocotaco]

You need to find out what kind of flowers she used. There are some commonly used garden flowers that are hella poisonous: Hellabore, Monkshood etc…
I would probably filter my beer through her best sweater for something like that.

Before I say something in SWMBO's defense, I have to agree with this... make sure she's not actively trying to kill you. It would surprise me, but those kind of people are out there.

Next, assuming it's a relatively benign flower like a rose petal or something... she is doing this in lieu of communicating because she doesn't feel like she can communicate with you. Marriage is like an international diplomatic relationship. There are things happening on both sides that the other side has no idea about. If there's no communication, it comes down to interpretation of actions. That eventually escalates and leads to either cold war or nuclear war. Neither of those things will make your life better.

There's a lot of bravado talk in this thread about how you need to wear the pants and show her who's in charge. Resist that. It's crap. Unless your wife is the submissive type, you are both in charge. You need to understand why she did what she did and work with her to correct her perceptions that led her to feel like it was appropriate or necessary. If something you did made her feel that way, you need to figure out what it was so that you can clear the air and make her understand why you did that - maybe it was something she did that made you do it, etc. There is a whole chain of actions and reactions that needs to be unraveled if you want to have a healthy marriage. (disclaimer: I am not a marriage counselor and my marriage has its share of bumps like any other)

That said, I don't see anything wrong with messing around a little bit. If the beer goes sour (likely the worst thing that will happen, unless she dropped foxglove or something in your beer) you could come back with "Honey, you're a genius! That flower you put in my beer had an amazing wild ale strain on it and now I'm winning awards all over the place! These monks in Belgium invited me to give a talk about it! We're gonna be famous!" (of course it's probably not true, but it might not be entirely false and it's funny)

But yeah, first step is to fish out the flower and post pics so we can all try to figure out what kind of flower it is. For example, these would be a bad sign:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Digitalis
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Conium
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Nerium
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Atropa_belladonna
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lily_of_the_valley

 

[insanim8er]

I always begin brewing at 6 am or earlier and finish before anyone is even awake so it's not that process that bothers her. Still trying to figure it out.

Maybe ask her?

Sometimes the problem is simply the effort they see being put into brewing and the lack of effort being put into them.

But regardless, I know mine would never be that vindictive to sabotage anything of mine... Instead she'll tell me whats up. I'll consider myself lucky.

 

[Remmy]

I think you may need to worry a little less about the beer and start looking at marriage counseling.

+1

Or, before she poisons your coffee in the morning.

 

[JonM]

Why was she pissed again? Or at least, why do you think she was pissed (which may be entirely different from why she was actually pissed.)

 

[Vetter]

The next time you brew, just tell her it's your own recipe and your naming it after her.
Something like, Betties Big Butt Brew, Debbies Flower Child Menagerie, Karens Krazy Pedal Pint. She would appreciate you bringing her into your hobby.

 

[Schlenkerla]

Before I say something in SWMBO's defense, I have to agree with this... make sure she's not actively trying to kill you. It would surprise me, but those kind of people are out there.

Yeah think of Showtimes Series of Dexter.

 

[rjbank]

How you put up with this and sleep at night is beyond me.


Sent from my iPhone using Home Brew

 

[BGBC]

No response from OP in 2 days now. I will assume flower-poisoning until I hear otherwise.

 

[satph]

The Op's profile says she's a single woman. So either he's lying there, or this thread is a hoax. Since crawfman posted about a rye lavender, coriander, rose hip saison here, wouldn't she know quite a bit about flowers pitched into the beer?

Also, anyone suggesting escalating a war with the spouse, probably never saw The War of The Roses. "When a couple starts keeping score, there is no winning, it's only degrees of losing."
[ame]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5ebv3i_9Ltc[/ame]

 

[zeptrey]

Before I say something in SWMBO's defense, I have to agree with this... make sure she's not actively trying to kill you. It would surprise me, but those kind of people are out there.

Next, assuming it's a relatively benign flower like a rose petal or something... she is doing this in lieu of communicating because she doesn't feel like she can communicate with you. Marriage is like an international diplomatic relationship. There are things happening on both sides that the other side has no idea about. If there's no communication, it comes down to interpretation of actions. That eventually escalates and leads to either cold war or nuclear war. Neither of those things will make your life better.

There's a lot of bravado talk in this thread about how you need to wear the pants and show her who's in charge. Resist that. It's crap. Unless your wife is the submissive type, you are both in charge. You need to understand why she did what she did and work with her to correct her perceptions that led her to feel like it was appropriate or necessary. If something you did made her feel that way, you need to figure out what it was so that you can clear the air and make her understand why you did that - maybe it was something she did that made you do it, etc. There is a whole chain of actions and reactions that needs to be unraveled if you want to have a healthy marriage. (disclaimer: I am not a marriage counselor and my marriage has its share of bumps like any other)

That said, I don't see anything wrong with messing around a little bit. If the beer goes sour (likely the worst thing that will happen, unless she dropped foxglove or something in your beer) you could come back with "Honey, you're a genius! That flower you put in my beer had an amazing wild ale strain on it and now I'm winning awards all over the place! These monks in Belgium invited me to give a talk about it! We're gonna be famous!" (of course it's probably not true, but it might not be entirely false and it's funny)

But yeah, first step is to fish out the flower and post pics so we can all try to figure out what kind of flower it is. For example, these would be a bad sign:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Digitalis
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Conium
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Nerium
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Atropa_belladonna
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lily_of_the_valley

Yeck...too much. The way I see it, you have 3 options. DIVORCE! Or bang her sister...that'll teach her for wasting precious beer. Or just talk it out, but that's too rational. Good luck whichever way you choose, and no matter what post some pics if her sister is hot...

 

[beernbourbon]

The Op's profile says she's a single woman. So either he's lying there, or this thread is a hoax.

Ok, so I'm not the only one that picked up on that......

 

[DaNewf]

The Op's profile says she's a single woman. So either he's lying there, or this thread is a hoax.

According to my profile I am also Female and single (I'm neither).

Default profile settings, how do they work?

 

[dobe12]

My wife is very supportive and never gives me a hard time about brewing, but one trick I use is to plan brew days almost every weekend. Then when a family obligation comes up, which they do/will all the time, calmly cancel the brew day and put if off until the following week. Knowing that I have no problem cancelling/rescheduling a brew day for family time goes a long way.... or at least I think it does.

But yeah, sabotaging your beer? There are deeper issues there and I'd be worried if I were you. It takes a twisted mind to purposefully sabotage a loved ones personal items, hobbies, food, drink, or what have you.

 

[troy2000]

My wife doesn't like my brewing but would not sabatoge it. I brew on my own budget.

If she did, the house budget would be be buying me a stainless rig and it would be drop shipped to my new home.

In the mean... I mean, mean time. I'd be tempted to mess up her stuff.
1) Every piece of her clothing would have a hole or cigarette burn in it.
2) I'd grab every pair of high heel shoes she owns and saw 1/2" off the heel on just one shoe.
3) I'd bust at least one hook on each of her bras after i put odorless bengay on the left D cup.
4) I'd put nair in her shampoo
5) I'd dip all of of the light bulbs in garlic juice then screw them back into the sockets.
6) I stuff fresh shrimp inside the curtain rods in the living room.
7) I'd put her work email address on every porn website that I could find.
8) I'd make sure I have mobile remote control of her xfinity cable box with it set to record WWF wresting on PPV only during prime time.
9) I'd use facesniff to post MILF & Sugar Daddy's links on her Facebook Wall.
10) I'd brew beer on my new rig and think of some other crap to do to her.

Okay... I think you can forget the first rule of survival. You'd play heck finding anyone crazier than yourself...

 

[j1n]

No response from OP in 2 days now. I will assume flower-poisoning until I hear otherwise.

It was probably Lilly of the valley.

RIP OP.

 

[mwilcox]

So this happened on Mother's Day?

curious if the OP has kids and didn't do something for their mother.
Not that that makes it right, but I've heard of worse reactions.

 

[Keith_O]

Wow... I guess I'm a lucky guy... My wife is just excited a have a hobby not involving poles and $1 bills...

jk,jk...

 

[dobe12]

Wow... I guess I'm a lucky guy... My wife is just excited a have a hobby not involving poles and $1 bills...

jk,jk...

That's hilarious! That's exactly what my wife tells people if they question how much money or time I spend on brewing. She says "He has a hobby he likes and it's in our house. It's not like he's out gambling or at strip clubs."

 

[JonM]

So this happened on Mother's Day?



curious if the OP has kids and didn't do something for their mother.

Not that that makes it right, but I've heard of worse reactions.

Good catch. I think you're on to something.


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