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What would you tell yourself?

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1) Spend the money on a fermentation chest freezer and temp controller.

2) Where to store my bottles that are conditioning. I have ~100 at any given time.
 
I store boxed bottles of beer under my bottling table. It'll fit 4-5 gallon batches under there. Otherwise, don't go cheap on the amount of yeast!
 
I just wondered - If you could talk to yourself at the start of your home brew hobby / life what advice would you give yourself? What the one thing you wished you knew when you first started?

That all grain biab is easy, and I shouldn't waste the money on three extract batches before going all grain. Also, get the propane burner right away. Pregnant women don't like the smell, no matter how delicious it smells to you.
 
If I could go back to 1994 and speak to my 26 year-old self brewing his first extract kit, here is what I would say:

1 - Welcome to the hobby! To satisfy your inner engineer, you will likely spend thousands of man-hours researching, analyzing, experimenting, building and welding in addition to your brewing. Indulge yourself, it will be time well spent and be as enjoyable as the brewing itself!
2 - Move to all-grain as soon as you are comfortable and can afford decent equipment.
3 - Do not listen to anyone who tells you to relax, it is only homebrew. :)
4 - Do not listen to anyone who says "buy the plastic one", it is just as good for homebrewing. You will end up giving that stuff away and buying/building twice.
5 - Don't be afraid do dump a batch and start over. You can always buy "good beer" at the store.
6 - Invest time, money and energy into temperature control, especially for the mash and fermentation. You cannot brew great beer without temperature control.
7 - For every hour you spend learning about grain/malt, spend 4 on yeast, 2 on hops, 4 on water and 2 on recipe design.
8 - Never commit yourself to using one house yeast strain unless you have gone pro and even then I would encourage myself to forego it if at all possible.
9 - Forget bottling only, it sucks and will make you dread parts of your brewing process.
10 - I'm glad you built your own brewing/log software. The knowledge gained was immeasurable.
11 - Teach your sons to brew from a young age. Oh, never mind....good job!
12 - As soon as you can, brew four beers with the same grain bill, same hop schedule, but different yeast strains/fermentation temp schedule. You will be shocked at what you learn.
13 - Buy base malts in 50 lb sacks and store in 5g buckets in a cool dry place. You will be happy you did this.
14 - Learn how to prepare adequate starters right away.
15 - Learn how to can wort and prepare yeast slants, and then forget both until you retire and are bored for something to do.
16 - Buy Bru'n and be nice to Martin. He will help you with tons of knowledge on building water.
17 - Speaking of which, buy a decent RO system and learn to build your own water to style appropriate profiles NOT to city/region profiles. Every brewery treats its water, so matching city/region profiles is probably inaccurate, a waste of time and will inevitably lead to some bad batches.
18 - Create a log and record ALL temps, times, quantities, conditions throughout your brewhouse. It is one of the best ways to learn and the foundation for ALL troubleshooting.
19 - Never lift a full glass carboy without it being in a milk crate.
20 - Vaccuum seal and freeze your hops for storage. They will last a lot longer, taste and smell better and save you money in the long run.
21 - You won't listen, but buy a 15g boil kettle from the get-go.
22 - Three-piece valves are much better than two-piece and butterfly's are the bees-knees.
23 - Did I mention to never lift a full carboy unless it is in a milk crate?
24 - Racking and pouring both suck. Design your system/process to use gravity and pumps. Your back will thank you and your forearms will have less burn scars.
 
Keep it simple. You can brew excellent beers without cramming them full of adjunct. And if you do deviate from a recipe, pick one thing to change it up, not 4 or 5. That maple bourbon coffee vanilla porter might just taste better without the garbage pail of ingredients added to the grain bill.

Invest in temperature control, through fermentation, lagering, and long term storage. You will be at less risk for off flavors.

Yeast management makes the difference between a good beer and a lousy one. Buy a 5L Erlenmeyer flask and a stir plate capable of handling it. Harvest yeast from starters and keep your yeast bank as full as practical.
 

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