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"If God had intended us to drink beer, He would have given us stomachs." - David Daye

"You're not drunk if you can lie on the floor without holding on." - Dean Martin

"Have a beer. It don't cost nothin'." - Animal House

"Never trust a man who doesn't drink." - W.C. Fields (also John Wayne, Hemingway, James Crumley, etc.)

"Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder." - unk

"If you ever reach total enlightenment while drinking beer, I bet it makes beer shoot out your nose." - "Deep Thoughts," by Jack Handy

“Some men can swing from their heals on the trapeze, some men can become president of the Republic, I can drink cognac.” – Moulin Rouge (1954, Huston)

“An alcoholic is someone you don't like, who drinks as much as you do.” – Dylan Thomas
 
"Who needs a Born-on-Date when you’re in the delivery room?"- Above the bar at the River Rock Brewery in Little Rock, Arkansas.
 
"Can I pour you a beer, Mr. Peterson?"
"A little early isn't it, Woody?"
"For a beer?"
"No, for stupid questions."
 
[ame=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=v12F0bZkJ4E]Cry Walk - Home Movies - YouTube[/ame]

From a great cartoon comedy called "Home Movies"

"you said there'd be beer, and there was, but now there isn't, so I'm leaving..."
 
"Bart, a woman is like beer. They look good, they smell good, and you'd step over your own mother just to get one!" -Homer Simpson

"Would you like a beer, Mr. Peterson?"
"No, I'd like a dead cat in a glass." -Norm Peterson. Fits my sense of humor I guess.

"I'd rather have a bottle in front of me than a Frontal Lobotomy." -from a 70's t-shirt my uncle wore.
 
Hermit hoar, in solemn cell,
Wearing out life's evening gray,
Smite thy bosom, sage, and tell,
What is bliss? and which the way?
Thus I spoke; and speaking sighed;
Scarce repressed the starting tear;
When the smiling sage replied:
"Come, my lad, and drink some beer."

From Boswell's "Life of Johnson"
London, England - 1791
 
"you can't say you've been drinking all day if you don't start early!"
The founder of Hooters during an interview on Drinking Made Easy.
 
... < please stand by >

embedding suddenly not functioning on this thread?
Squirrely servers?
sheesh.
nevermind.
 
From one of my favorite places:

We don’t brew beer for the masses. Instead, our beers are crafted for a chosen few, a small cadre of renegades and rebels who enjoy a beer that pushes the limits of what is commonly accepted as taste. In short, we make beer for people like us. -Founders Brewing Co.
 
"Say for what were hop yards meant
And why was Burton built on Trent?"

....

"And malt does more than Milton can
To glorify god's ways to man"

A. E. Houseman; Shropshire Lad
 
“Bars in the daytime are like women without makeup.” - Lady Snowblood (1973)

Det. Lt. Nick Frescia: Generally I recommend my men stay away from vodka, and stick with scotch and bourbon [and beer].
Jo Ann: Why is that?
Nick Frescia: So the brass will know they're drunk and not stupid.
 
I used to have this as my signature:

&#8220;A glass of bitter or pale ale, taken with the principal meal of the day, does more good and less harm than any medicine the physician can prescibe.&#8221;
&#8212; Dr. S. Carpenter, England, 1750
---------

Incorporating two brands and two expletives (courtesy of David Lynch's "Blue Velvet"):

"F*** that Heineken s***! Pabst Blue Ribbon!"
 
Just came across this one about home brewing from Michael Pollan:

Along the way, a succession of &#8220;fermentos&#8221; tutored me in the techniques of
artfully managing rot, the folly of the modern war against bacteria,
the erotics of disgust, and the somewhat upside-down notion that,
while we were fermenting alcohol, alcohol has been fermenting us.
 
I've taken more out of alcohol than alcohol has taken out of me.
- Sir Winston Churchill

Sit, be still, and listen: because you're drunk, and we're at the edge of the roof.
-Rumi

My lips got lost on the way to the kiss - that's how drunk I was.
-Rumi

Always do sober what you said you'd do drunk. That will teach you to keep your mouth shut.
-Ernest Hemingway

Religions change; beer & wine remain.
-Henry Allen

We are here to drink beer.
We are here to kill war.
We are here to laugh at the odds an live our lives so well that Death will tremble to take us.
- Charles Bukowski

Sounds bad. With any luck I hope I will be drunk enough that I don't notice.
- Douglas Adams
 

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