To Maintain A Healthy Level Of Insanity

[Schlenkerla]

[FONT=Arial, sans-serif]To Maintain A Healthy Level Of Insanity[/FONT][FONT=Arial, sans-serif]

1. At Lunch Time, Sit In Your Parked Car With Sunglasses on and point a Hair Dryer At Passing Cars. See If They Slow Down.

[/FONT][FONT=Arial, sans-serif]2. Page Yourself Over The Intercom. Don't Disguise Your Voice! [/FONT][FONT=Arial, sans-serif]

3. Every Time Someone Asks You To Do Something, ask If They Want Fries with that. [/FONT]
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4. Put Decaf In The Coffee Maker For 3 Weeks . Once Everyone has Gotten Over Their Caffeine Addictions, Switch to Espresso.[/FONT][FONT=Arial, sans-serif]

5. In the Memo Field Of All Your Checks, Write ' For Marijuana.

[/FONT][FONT=Arial, sans-serif]6. Skip down the hall Rather Than Walk and see how many looks you get. [/FONT][FONT=Arial, sans-serif]

7. Order a Diet Water whenever you go out to eat, with a serious face..

[/FONT][FONT=Arial, sans-serif]8. Specify That Your Drive-through Order Is 'To Go'.

[/FONT][FONT=Arial, sans-serif]9. Sing Along At The Opera.[/FONT]
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10. Five Days In Advance, Tell Your Friends You Can't Attend Their Party Because You have a headache.

[/FONT][FONT=Arial, sans-serif]11. When The Money Comes Out The ATM, Scream 'I Won! I Won!' [/FONT][FONT=Arial, sans-serif]

12. When Leaving the Zoo, Start Running towards the Parking lot, Yelling 'Run For Your Lives! They're Loose!' [/FONT]
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13. Tell Your Children Over Dinner, 'Due To The Economy, We Are Going To Have To Let One Of You Go.' [/FONT]
[FONT=Arial, sans-serif][/FONT][FONT=Arial, sans-serif]14. Pick up a box of condoms at the pharmacy, go to the counter and ask where the fitting room is.

15. [/FONT]Walk up to someone at an airport with a serious face and simply say...Don't get on the plane.

 

[Papinquack]

I loved that! Brightened my morning.

 

[david_42]

13. Tell Your Children Over Dinner, 'Due To The Economy, We Are Going To Have To Let One Of You Go.'

"We're going to have to sell you for medical research." Intro to "Every Sperm is Sacred."

 

[Revvy]

I really needed this! Thanks!

 

[Ridge Runner]

That was hilarious!! Thanks for the gut-buster

 

[Schlenkerla]

You guys are welcome!

 

[RICLARK]

That is so bad ass! You forgot the Dane cook Line, "Walk up to someone at an airport with a serious face and simply say...Don't get on the plane" Then walk away.

 

[Schlenkerla]

That is so bad ass! You forgot the Dane cook Line, "Walk up to someone at an airport with a serious face and simply say...Don't get on the plane" Then walk away.

There you go...

 

[Anthony_Lopez]

I have seen a bunch of these in the past...

A few other good ones:

While riding in a crowded elevator, when someone bumps into you scream "BAD TOUCH"

Walk through a shopping mall with a small cooler that reads "Human Organ's"

Also, while no one is around at work, take a piece of paper out of the copy machine and staple it. Now make as many copies of it as your copy machine can hold...

My buddy did the staple trick at work... They took the entire machine apart looking for a staple on the optics of the copy machine... EFFIN CLASSIC!

 

[Flyin' Lion]

[FONT=Arial, sans-serif]To Maintain A Healthy Level Of Insanity[/FONT][FONT=Arial, sans-serif]

1. At Lunch Time, Sit In Your Parked Car With Sunglasses on and point a Hair Dryer At Passing Cars. See If They Slow Down.

[/FONT][FONT=Arial, sans-serif]2. Page Yourself Over The Intercom. Don't Disguise Your Voice! [/FONT][FONT=Arial, sans-serif]

3. Every Time Someone Asks You To Do Something, ask If They Want Fries with that. [/FONT]
[FONT=Arial, sans-serif]
4. Put Decaf In The Coffee Maker For 3 Weeks . Once Everyone has Gotten Over Their Caffeine Addictions, Switch to Espresso.[/FONT][FONT=Arial, sans-serif]

5. In the Memo Field Of All Your Checks, Write ' For Marijuana.

[/FONT][FONT=Arial, sans-serif]6. Skip down the hall Rather Than Walk and see how many looks you get. [/FONT][FONT=Arial, sans-serif]

7. Order a Diet Water whenever you go out to eat, with a serious face..

[/FONT][FONT=Arial, sans-serif]8. Specify That Your Drive-through Order Is 'To Go'.

[/FONT][FONT=Arial, sans-serif]9. Sing Along At The Opera.[/FONT]
[FONT=Arial, sans-serif]
10. Five Days In Advance, Tell Your Friends You Can't Attend Their Party Because You have a headache.

[/FONT][FONT=Arial, sans-serif]11. When The Money Comes Out The ATM, Scream 'I Won! I Won!' [/FONT][FONT=Arial, sans-serif]

12. When Leaving the Zoo, Start Running towards the Parking lot, Yelling 'Run For Your Lives! They're Loose!' [/FONT]
[FONT=Arial, sans-serif]
13. Tell Your Children Over Dinner, 'Due To The Economy, We Are Going To Have To Let One Of You Go.' [/FONT]
[FONT=Arial, sans-serif]14. Pick up a box of condoms at the pharmacy, go to the counter and ask where the fitting room is.

15. [/FONT]Walk up to someone at an airport with a serious face and simply say...Don't get on the plane.

I do some of these already, although instead of skipping, swing the same arm with the same leg while walking (instead of the opposite arm).

I love the zoo one too, last time I was at the zoo I walked up to the Llama cage saying "tastes like chicken."