Things that come out of the SWMBO's mouth!

[dallasdb]

"something is wrong with your thing...only foam comes out."

Heard that!

 

[azscoob]

My wife mostly avoids my brewing, so no good words there. The drinking side however.... This past Halloween extravaganza she states: Why am I so bad at beerpong??? [falls over] I calmly state that she is playing with my 8.5% 'Reaper of souls' Hefe. and the other team is playing with my 2.9% English mild.

 

[Xcorpia]

You guys crack me up. My SWMBO doesn't say a word about my brewing. She just silently give me the dreaded evil-eyed look.

 

[milldoggy]

You have to learn.... there are real prices and "wife" prices.. if it cost you $30 tell the wife it was $10

She is keen to wife prices, need a new tactic.

 

[bullinachinashop]

After eyeing 5 or 6 cases on the shelf in the bar and knowing there are 3 taps running, she says " When do you have enough!"

Hmmmm.....I think I'll increase my batch size from 10 to 15 gallons on Sat!

 

[millsware]

My wife mostly avoids my brewing, so no good words there. The drinking side however.... This past Halloween extravaganza she states: Why am I so bad at beerpong??? [falls over] I calmly state that she is playing with my 8.5% 'Reaper of souls' Hefe. and the other team is playing with my 2.9% English mild.

That's hilarious.

 

[doctorRobert]

She is keen to wife prices, need a new tactic.

Husband prices are far worse than wife prices.

 

[FrewBrew]

She is keen to wife prices, need a new tactic.

When asked how much a given batch cost, I respond with a price relative to commercial beer:
Ie: my IPA cost $30 less than 2 cases of Dogfish head IPA... and when I can make it with my own hops $45 less

 

[ArcaneXor]

<any beer I give her> Mmm... that's good... but it's not really my style.

 

[Slowfro]

her - "how many beers have you had so far?"
me - "what makes you think I've been drinking beers already?"
her - "you're brewing...you always drink when you brew"

 

[beeber]

usually -

What's that smell, that horrible smell?
You're doing THAT again???

last time -

Hey, what's that? It smells good.

Go figure

 

[unionrdr]

My wife likes the smell of wort & hops. When we're sitting at the comp to watch videos,& she asks "are we gunna have some of your beers"? I say yes,& she beams a great smile,shakes her fists,& says "yes! yes! yes!". Can't beat that with a stick...

 

[diverpat]

My SWMBO is my all too honest beer tester. After my 4th batch she confessed to me this:

"All of your beers smell like urine, not fresh urine but urine from some back alley"

It was a huge confidence builder because that was the exact taste I've been going for! Now, how she can differentiate between fresh and alley urine is what concerns me.

 

[IrregularPulse]

My latest from last night. I told her her, since theirs nothing on tap, I think it'd be a good time to tear down the keezer and finish the bar. Then it could be done whn the four batches fermenting are ready. Wouldn't it e cool to have 4 on tap at once? Sh says, yeah it'd be cool to have 4 beers on tap at once... that I can't drink any of! (preggo)

 

[maffewl]

My SWMBO is my all too honest beer tester. After my 4th batch she confessed to me this:

"All of your beers smell like urine, not fresh urine but urine from some back alley"

It was a huge confidence builder because that was the exact taste I've been going for! Now, how she can differentiate between fresh and alley urine is what concerns me.

4 Bud clones seems excessive...

 

[jd3]

her: "I thought doing this was going to SAVE us money?"

me: "I thought you SAVED money at Macy's last week?"

Her: "I did. I saved almost $200"

me: "You didn't SAVE crap... You SPENT 300 bucks! If you saved money, so did I."

Her: "You're sleeping on the couch".

me: "I know."

 

[pwndabear]

my bitch don't say ****. she know better.

actually, she doesn't much care too much however i made a strawberry blonde for her to hopefully make her care. that way she'll say "make that strawberry thing again," and i'll tell her that i want to make it better for her and that i need--NEED--a kegging system to make it better for her.

 

[heferly]

"you already have a beer on tap, keg my beer next"

glad she's into it, i guess

me: "i need a propane burner"

her: "why? what's wrong with the stove"

me: "you don't want all that humidity from a 60 min boil in the house all summer..."

pause

her: "start looking for a good deal"

 

[Niemer]

"Can I drink it yet?"

 

[jd3]

my bitch don't say ****. she know better.

The eternal saying of single or approaching single men everywhere.

 

[l1ranger]

55 pound bag of Maris Otter sitting on the kitchen table, "Is this sack going to be dropped from an airplane to feed the hungry, or are you going to move it."

you swmbo is hilarious:rockin:


me - taste this
her - thats great, what is it
me - raspberry wheat
her - oh, i dont like wheat beers

she then proceeds to reach in the fridge and grab her own for consumptions

its made more hilarious by the fact that her favorite commercial brew is bells oberon

 

[DirtBagRob]

She hates the smell of brewing. When I brewed last Monday she said, "At least the smell of burning sweet potatos in the kitchen is covering up the smell of egg farts coming from the guest bedroom." Her best friend is staying at our house for a few nights next week. I hope she agrees.

 

[GilaMinumBeer]

Your wives have amazingly tame mouths.

 

[Jenks829]

I had two five gallon buckets from a feisty fermenting batch going in the spare bathroom tub. She said "if they blow up, this whole thing is over." I watched them like a hawk, did the clean up and everything is cool.

Ha ha!!! This is how my homebrew experience began. A little over two years into in now and she had built some confidence that things will be ok in the fermentation room but still peaks in there to make sure nothing blew up every now and again.

 

[ChshreCat]

"something is wrong with your thing...only foam comes out." <--shortly after :fro:

ow!

 

[ChshreCat]

This one wasn't from my SWMBO, but from a friend's. She was going crazy living in the little town they were in and had been wanting to move for a while. It finally got to the point where something needed to happen so she sat him down and said, "Jack... Either I'm moving away, or I'm going to kill myself. Either way, I'm taking you with me. Your choice."

 

[BendBrewer]

My SWMBO is great. All she says about my beer is

"Thanks for all the work you do to keep beer on tap baby."

 

[DakotaRules]

Mine never liked beer until a few years ago, she only drank good craft beer before we met. When I started my first batches were all right and she said "if these don't get better your going to have to find a new hobby." The next 10 batches were so tasty she let me continue. I made her an apricot ale at 14% abv and she loved it until she found out that she was drinking 700 calories a glass and passing out 7 pm after 1 or 2 beers. Now she says "make that apricot thing again but half the alcohol. I know you smoke cigars after I pass out!"

 

[Pick]

Mine doesn't really like to drink beer, but she is supportive of my brewing. I guess I can't ask for much more than that.

 

[Whippy]

After I brewed my very first batch of beer (which happened to be an infected disgusting mess,) SWMBO tells me, "It smells just like my father's homebrew...I never liked homebrew at all."

A few batches later when I started brewing tasty beer, she says, "Wow, this smells excellent, like something you could buy in the store! I never knew you could make it like this at home." (she only smells it because she went on the wagon years before we met.)

On one hand, I am glad my father-in-law lives on the other side of the world so I don't have to critique his homebrew, but on the other hand it would be nice to improve beers together with him.