Things about your co-workers that annoy you

[brew_ny]

Yeah. She took a leave of absence and when she returned she was using one of those mobility scooters. Something is up.


Oh, I have another gripe. I work on a computer help desk. As a result someone always answers the phone. This makes my coworkers/'customers'/etc all realize that since we answer the phone, and are behind computers, that we are receptionists or operators too.

"Thanks for calling... this is DrunkleJon how can I help you?"
Transfer me to my boss Billy Bob
...

That why I have no voice mail or ever answer the phone

make all my users do everything by email unless I call them

also if the time ever comes we can print said emails and it is not he said she said

it is what is in black and white

had an instructor one tell me to remember "user rhythms with loser"


all the best

S_M

 

[GrogNerd]

customer (the office boss) calls, says they have a guy whose payment check bounced, so they need to reverse his payment. easy. go to his payment screen, highlight the payment and hit the REVERSE button. done.

I explain: when he comes back in to make good on the bounced check, whether you charge him for that or not, you just take the payment like you do 100 times a day every day

they say: oh, no, we want to undo all that you just did. we want to undo the reversal. unreverse that

me: like I said, when the guy comes in to pay you back for the bounced payment, post that payment like any other payment. that's how you unreverse it

customer: no, you don't understand. we need to undo the reversal

me: trust me, trust the computer, trust our program. it will all work out if you just wait until he comes to pay you back, then you repost the payment like this all never happened

customer: no, you don't understand. we need to undo the reversal

5 full minutes of this going back and forth.

 

[Taiin]

How is it, working at a strip club?

It would be fantastic....if you know, sexy people were the ones stripping. 99% of the time, 'tis confused elderly folks. The other 1% of the time, well, let me just say some people are amateur exhibitionists.

 

[DrunkleJon]

I have decided that when my coworkers next ask me a stupid question I am going to reply with one of the answers from a Magic 8 Ball and see how long it takes for them to figure it out.

 

[Grannyknot]

Right outside my office is a central thermostat for about 15 offices & rooms.
Due to my close proximity to the thermostat, I am by default, the keeper of the thermostat.

People stick their head into my office about every 15 minutes.....
"Are you hot/cold?"
"Can I change the thermostat setting?"
"Has someone been messing with the thermostat?"
"Don't let anyone touch the thermostat"
"Is someone coming today to repair the heat/ac?"
"Do you know how to program the thermostat?"

I've never touched the thermostat. I've never even complained about the temp in the office. I don't even look at it.

There is an office near the parking lot. I'm thinking about sticking my head in there once or twice a day to inquire about parking policies or when a pot hole will be filled. Might do a similar thing to the guy next to the men's bathroom.

 

[Grannyknot]

I have decided that when my coworkers next ask me a stupid question I am going to reply with one of the answers from a Magic 8 Ball and see how long it takes for them to figure it out.

My favorite answer is "Closer than ever" to any time related question.
It gives a sense of satisfaction, however provides absolutely no detail.

When do you think those submittals will be returned?
"I don't know but at this point we are closer than ever."

 

[Horsehead]

I curse out loud sometimes...where does that rank?

I often do that in response to my inner dialogue while talking with coworkers.

 

[Tin4]

I curse out loud all the time. Slow page load? Bastard! Less than satisfied with the page load time? You're a piece of crap! Issues with getting a pager to load quickly? I'm pretty sure my CPU's mom is a prostitute.

I get mad about everything but that's what I curse over.

 

[TheCADJockey]

Issues with getting a pager to load quickly?

 

[Tin4]

Bwahahahahahaha I misspelled something.

 

[TheCADJockey]

- When my boss comes in my office, farts, stares at me for a second like it didn't happen and then leaves.

- When someone makes it a point every morning to ask how you are, but responds "living the dream" every day when you return the courtesy.

 

[hunter_le five]

- When my boss comes in my office, farts, stares at me for a second like it didn't happen and then leaves.

He's asserting his dominance. Quite successfully, I might add.

I tried that once, and got an HR complaint filed against me.

 

[TheCADJockey]

He's asserting his dominance. Quite successfully, I might add.

I tried that once, and got an HR complaint filed against me.

Jokes on him... everyone knows he is the culprit and his office is the bog of eternal stench, now whenever we cross paths I crop dust him and he gets the blame.

 

[gratus fermentatio]

We've got a guy here who plays the Bee Gee's all the time. As if that wasn't bad enough, he sings along in off-key falsetto.
:smack:

 

[TheCADJockey]

We've got a guy here who plays the Bee Gee's all the time. As if that wasn't bad enough, he sings along in off-key falsetto.
:smack:

Eww dude..

My boss plays whatever the hell you call this new music emo crap. I hear Take Me to Church by Hozier minimum 3 times a day. Oh yeah, and he tries to whistle along to his songs but has zero musical background. It grates away at my soul.

 

[j1n]

Eww dude..

My boss plays whatever the hell you call this new music emo crap. I hear Take Me to Church by Hozier minimum 3 times a day. Oh yeah, and he tries to whistle along to his songs but has zero musical background. It grates away at my soul.

Could try to reverse it on him and try to sing it and make him annoyed so he stops playing it. might kill a bit of your soul by doing this though.

 

[MaxStout]

When someone makes it a point every morning to ask how you are, but responds "living the dream" every day when you return the courtesy.

Bleccch. I hear that drivel whenever some coworkers return from whatever flavor-of-the-month motivational seminar they just attended. They spend the next several weeks spewing out all the empty platitudes they picked up there.

Some of them are even impressionable from TV commercials. A few years ago there was this clown who, every Wednesday, would walk into the office, bellowing "Uh oh...guess what day it is! Guess what day it is!"

 

[TheCADJockey]

"Uh oh...guess what day it is! Guess what day it is!"

Ugh. We've got a lot of that around here, mostly from the sales dept. which consists of a much older group of people. They will blurt out that exact quote, then proceed to laugh like they are high on whip-its and horse tranquilizer. They feed off each other.

I just stare daggers at them from my office. They love me.

 

[TinyHands]

Conference calls. Cubicles. Full volume. That is all.

Lord, beer me strength.

 

[smizak]

Mines the annoying turd who vomits out Fox News talking points incessantly. I got him to stop by saying "thanks Obama!' after every minor occurrence of inconvenience that befalls my work day.

"Great, we're out of coffee. Thanks Obama!"

Lol

 

[TheCADJockey]

Mines the annoying turd who vomits out Fox News talking points incessantly.

You talking about my boss, and his boss? They constantly try to "Out News" each other by yelling across the building, of course.

"Did you hear the Sabres..."

"Yeah they signed Bylsma!"

Don't force that crap on us :cross:

 

[smizak]

You talking about my boss, and his boss? They constantly try to "Out News" each other by yelling across the building, of course.

"Did you hear the Sabres..."

"Yeah they signed Bylsma!"

Don't force that crap on us :cross:

Exactly.

It's ok though, his know-it-all, obnoxious personality makes him the target of all our practical jokes and pranks. Dude fell for "dollar on a string" and "quarter glued to the ground" in the same week. Like my man, you just got played with the dollar, aren't you suspicious of a quarter magically manifesting itself in the same place 2 days later? LOL.

Best part, we all cram into my bosses office so we can watch it on the security cam.

 

[fsr_racer]

The one who thinks that everything that comes out of her mouth is comedic gold, and laughs hysterically at the top of her lungs so the whole office knows she said something funny.

Also has a very creep obsession with her step-son, talking about him incessantly, even pretending what he would order when browsing a new menu. Not her husband, not the other step-kids, just what HE would order.

 

[1977Brewer]

I swear on my life that half this company is stuck in High School. Constant gossip and infighting and you never know who's friends with who. I just heard both sides of the same fight from both parties...and guess what? They're both in the wrong. One of them is leaving Friday, so at least this is the last of that particular soap opera of bitchiness.

 

[Zuljin]

I swear on my life that half this company is stuck in High School. Constant gossip and infighting and you never know who's friends with who. I just heard both sides of the same fight from both parties...and guess what? They're both in the wrong. One of them is leaving Friday, so at least this is the last of that particular soap opera of bitchiness.

You work where I work?

 

[1977Brewer]

You work where I work?

Got to hear it from a third party over lunch, until I finished my lunch and walked out of the breakroom. I do not care what Mabel said to Ethel.

 

[TheCADJockey]

Got to hear it from a third party over lunch, until I finished my lunch and walked out of the breakroom. I do not care what Mabel said to Ethel.

Maybe Mabel should mind her own damned business. She shouldn't have been hanging out with Walter anyway; he was cured off the Wild Turkey for months before she got involved.

 

[1977Brewer]

Maybe Mabel should mind her own damned business. She shouldn't have been hanging out with Walter anyway; he was cured off the Wild Turkey for months before she got involved.

I wish it was man drama. I'd be halfway interested. It involves a stack of paperwork placed in one ladies inbox when it belongs in another ladies inbox. So damn boring.

Although I'm the one gossiping to internet strangers about it.

 

[TheCADJockey]

Although I'm the one gossiping to internet strangers about it.

We're here for you. It's not your fault.

 

[1977Brewer]

OMG I just got a Hump DAYYYYY e-mail from my office supply sales guy. Dork.