The Dysfunctional-Palooza Obnoxious Masshole BS Thread

[TheDudeLebowski]

Tell everyone in the showroom about Lobstah-saw-us. I'm sure the car will get done real quick.

 

[paulthenurse]

Wicked good idea!

 

[paulthenurse]

It worked!!!!!!!!

 

[the_bird]

How much extra work do you think they billed Paulie for when they found out he was dumb enough to buy a boat?

 

[paulthenurse]

I didn't even know I HAD a flux capacitor. And how come its not covered by the warranty?

Oh well, at least the oil change was free,

 

[Cape Brewing]

Poor Ducksauce... just continuing to sit.

I guess we'll have to just keep on waiting to see who is the first one impaled when they sit on that bench and it shatters into shards of wood.

I like Mort's odds on being first one impaled.

 

[paulthenurse]

If its got to happen I really hope it happens to Mort instead of me. Sorry bout that, Mort.

 

[TheDudeLebowski]

Have you explained to Mort what the "implications" are on going out on the Duck Sauce:


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ar9spNzOFPk

 

[paulthenurse]

Oh Mort gets the implication all right. He's seen me peeling off a wetsuit. He knows EXACTLY what the implications are.



(And across the land, a collective "Eeeeyyyyuuuuuuu!" was heard.)

 

[the_bird]

Well, I get to go buy a chainsaw this morning.

 

[paulthenurse]

Lucky you. Get a big one, you can never have a tool that's too big.

 

[paulthenurse]

We got out yesterday for a while. 6-8 foot swells out at the Brewster. Putting divers in the water wasn't a prudent idea so we dropped hooks inside. Tommy even up a lobster!

Flounder for supper last night.

 

[bluemoose]

Lobstersawus, and laughed.

 

[paulthenurse]

Lobstersawus, and laughed.

It was a nervous laugh. An 'I just threw a meatball down the middle of the plate and the umpire called it a ball.' kind of laugh.

They know what's coming, her name is Alice and they are worried.

 

[paulthenurse]

Hey Jay,

Did you manage to avoid cutting your foot off with the chainsaw?

 

[yeager1977]

He's still in the hospital with a missing foot and d!ck. foot because of the chainsaw d!ck cause of the wife.

 

[the_bird]

That's quite the trick she has, ripping my cock off from 4000+miles away!

The tree's cleaned up, no damage done. My neighbor (whose tree it was) offered to cart it all up to the dump for me, one less thing for me to do. The whole tree needs to come down, it's probably sixty feet tall but it's lost a lot of branches and it's all intertwined with power lines, guide wires for telephone poles; we got lucky it didn't do any damage.

But, couldn't justify buying a saw because I'm not taking THAT tree down and it's not THAT big a deal to dissolve my dead hookers in a barrel of lyme instead of cutting them up.

 

[paulthenurse]

Why would you use lye? I'm telling you, shove those dead skanks in a 60 gallon barrel and fill it up with wort. That beer will have a sour, funky complexity that yeasts from the LHBS can't ever match. And if you use some of that yeast the next time SWMBO bakes bread your house will smell like a bakery from the wrong side of San Francisco!

 

[paulthenurse]

Just poured a beer.

The head has a decidedly green tint to it, as does the beer itself. Maybe I'm judging a book by its cover but I expect this ones going to be hoppy.

 

[the_bird]

Why the hell are you drinking months-old St. Patty's day lager?

 

[yeager1977]

Gangrene Hooker ale

 

[paulthenurse]

Gangrene Hooker ale

Don't knock it till you've knocked it



And since we all know you haven't knocked nuttin in months, you should shut yo yap, young Christopher. Just sayin

 

[ComcastWineRookie]

Heading out on the water tomorrow for some Cod and Haddock. Going with the guys on the Tuna.com out of Gloucester, my annual trip with them. Should be alot of fun.

 

[paulthenurse]

You'll be hanging by your ankles at dockside by 4pm. You've got a wicked high fat content, they'll probably get $20/pound for you.

 

[ComcastWineRookie]

they would get 30 a pound for you. great marbleing

 

[the_bird]

Bull****. Nobody's going to pay $27,000 for Paulie's dead body.

 

[ComcastWineRookie]

I think Cape would, so he could put his little spin on it for the bog water brew

 

[the_bird]

You think Cape's got twenty-seven large kicking around after his little nanobrewery investment?

 

[ComcastWineRookie]

bounce a check? after all its PTN

 

[Cape Brewing]

Anyone going to ACBF this weekend?