Haha! If you try this PLEASE take pictures.
Some Store bought ham has a lot of preservatives in it, I'd look at what your using. If you're worried about salt, use Yankee ham--the sugar cured kind.
I know lots of folks have successfully put bacon in their beer batches, but you have to worry about alcohol soluble fats. In other words, the fat can stay in solution till you drink it, at which time you get a mouth full of lard... Yummy.