Funny things you've overheard about beer

[Skeptidelphian]

Brought some SNPA to a Christmas party. My uncle goes, "oh wow, you like that dark beer."

I let it go. Later he starts talking about cocktails. Then after a few. I decided to correct his remark. I asked him what his favorite beer was. Heineken. I told him I could brew Heineken with a half pound of debittered black malt and it would taste pretty much the same. His revelation, "so you're telling me it's the malt and not the color that had to do with flavor?"

He's learning by Jove!

 

[andycr]

Brought a ton of homebrew to a family Christmas party. My brother and I are chatting and drinking pints of Haus Pale Ale, a very light-looking beer.

My BMC-drinking cousin sees it, and asks what it is. I explain it's homebrew, and offer him some. He says, "No thanks, I don't have the taste for it. It would be wasted on me."

Hmm, didn't think they would realize they don't know good beer. Only one way to correct that, though... Hate to see people not taking the red pill.

 

[Leadgolem]

I one heard a friend say that wine was way healthier than beer, and I laughed at her

Idk, I thought that that was rather funny ^_^

Red wine actually does have some health benefits. Provided you don't drink it in excess. Though it is not entirely clear if it is actually more beneficial then other kinds of alcohol.

 

[nmfree]

I one heard a friend say that wine was way healthier than beer, and I laughed at her

That's why I drink both- why take any chances?

 

[Brewskey]

I live in South Alabama where there are only 3 types of beer; bud light, coors light and miller lite. Anyway, I was sharing some homebrew IPAs with family during Christmas dinner today and got many comments about it "being good for a dark beer" etc... But to top it all off my Grandpa tells me that I need to let my barley sprout first so that it can "make its own yeast". I don't bother trying to explain anymore.....

Oh! And my step dad asked me if Yuengling was a Chinese beer!

 

[sirmeowsalot]

A guy at a table next to me at a craft beer pub asks the waiter "what do you recommend for a guy who likes drinking ales and lagers?"

I could tell the waiter was trying pretty hard to keep a straight face especially after I started snickering softly lol.

 

[punkrockdave]

I made some beer for my step daughters wedding back in September. One was an Anderson Valley Summer Solstice Cervesa and a Blue Berry ale. They were handed out as paty favors after the ceremony, overheard by the mother of the bride a guy says, "blueberry beer? I'll make sure the girl friend gets that ". This coming from a guy that was at the pool party the day before drinking a Bud Light out of an aluminum bottle.

 

[gcdowd]

But to top it all off my Grandpa tells me that I need to let my barley sprout first so that it can "make its own yeast". I don't bother trying to explain anymore.....

That is interesting because I was watching Moonshiners the other day and two of the guys were malting their own barley and using that in the mash because the price of corn was up due to a drought. The guy said something along the lines of the barley acting like the yeast. I was utterly confused. The only thing I could think of was that by letting the barley malt out in the sun for a few days, it would pick up some wild yeasts, which would in turn be used to ferment the mash.

 

[Lgaddy44]

That is interesting because I was watching Moonshiners the other day and two of the guys were malting their own barley and using that in the mash because the price of corn was up due to a drought. The guy said something along the lines of the barley acting like the yeast. I was utterly confused. The only thing I could think of was that by letting the barley malt out in the sun for a few days, it would pick up some wild yeasts, which would in turn be used to ferment the mash.

I too, find myself scratching my head on this one, and thought it might be wild yeast as well. I'm skeptical as to how much of these shows are really scripted. I don't watch them regularly, but sometimes I'll turn it on just to hate on them.

Last night I watched "Hillbilly Blood" for the first time. These two guys trekked into the woods carrying what looked to be about 5 gallons of their mash, so they could make a batch of moonshine. After a treacherous hike, and taking all of their hazardous precautions, they set up their "still". They simply covered the coil with some damp cloth, and that miraculously did the trick (makes me wonder why Tickle and the boys go through so much trouble, lol). At the end, they said they netted 8 quarts of hooch. From a 5 gallon bucket of mash? 8 quarts? Something in that math doesn't add up for me, but then again, I don't make moonshine.

 

[cluckk]

I've found the show has little to do with the science of brewing and distilling and more to do with what some backwoods distillers think is happening in their stuff. I saw the episode with them grinding their homemade malt too and when they said they grind it really fine so the malt flour could act as yeast for the mash I thought, "Oh great! There's another error people are going to be taking as science."

 

[Brewskey]

That is interesting because I was watching Moonshiners the other day and two of the guys were malting their own barley and using that in the mash because the price of corn was up due to a drought. The guy said something along the lines of the barley acting like the yeast. I was utterly confused. The only thing I could think of was that by letting the barley malt out in the sun for a few days, it would pick up some wild yeasts, which would in turn be used to ferment the mash.

I bet thats where he heard that. He loves those goofy shows.

 

[Epimetheus]

Me: I'm going to start brewing beer.
Wife: Ew!

Me: Try this first batch of extract.
Wife: Eeww!

Me: This all-grain smells wonderful, don't you think?
Wife: Eeewww!

Me: At least try the hard cider.
Wife: Eeww - wait, got any more?

We have a winner!

 

[Halbrust]

By my brother in law this weekend:
Absinthe is the best beer they make.
So, beer is made with barley?

Many more I can't think of right now.

 

[unionrdr]

Ha! that's a good one-the green fairy hits the craft brew world!

 

[SiriusStarr]

Me: I'm going to start brewing beer.
Wife: Ew!

Me: Try this first batch of extract.
Wife: Eeww!

Me: This all-grain smells wonderful, don't you think?
Wife: Eeewww!

Me: At least try the hard cider.
Wife: Eeww - wait, got any more?

We have a winner!

This was my mother. She despises every single style of beer she's ever tried (and she's tried a lot, thanks to me), because they all taste and smell too "beer-y". So I started making cider, and now she keeps trying to steal bottles of my cyser.

 

[EnjoyGoodBeer]

I got one. Was talking to my sisters bf (i have not met this fellow he lives severalllll states away) and I heard he loved good beers, so speaking over speaker phone I asked him what beers he liked, he replied that "I dont like american beers" I retorted with " so you dont like founders, seirra navada ect?" he says "I dont know iv never heard of them" then he said "I like belgian beers like trappist" and I say "well If I brewed you a belgian you would not like it because its american?" (confused)

There was a bit more to that conversation but I was talking with family and already had a few brews so I dont remember much more from that. Plus after that short convo that guy wasnt worth my time at that moment.

Im assuming he likes everything "imported" and if its not imported it sucks. Sad

 

[luke_d]

Make him a big American IPA and tell him it's a Belgian. Chances are he wouldn't tell the difference...

 

[EnjoyGoodBeer]

Make him a big American IPA and tell him it's a Belgian. Chances are he wouldn't tell the difference...

Agreed

Kinda ironic cause now i just did a tremis and a nocturnum. Bet he would love those. (if he knows what they are)

 

[skullface1818]

I got one. Was talking to my sisters bf (i have not met this fellow he lives severalllll states away) and I heard he loved good beers, so speaking over speaker phone I asked him what beers he liked, he replied that "I dont like american beers" I retorted with " so you dont like founders, seirra navada ect?" he says "I dont know iv never heard of them" then he said "I like belgian beers like trappist" and I say "well If I brewed you a belgian you would not like it because its american?" (confused)

There was a bit more to that conversation but I was talking with family and already had a few brews so I dont remember much more from that. Plus after that short convo that guy wasnt worth my time at that moment.

Im assuming he likes everything "imported" and if its not imported it sucks. Sad

I hate it when this happens........even when most of the top 10 beers in the world are american made

It is true that america had a dark age of brewing from prohibition up to the early 1980's, but since then I say that we make some of the finest beers in the world

 

[Grossy]

This was a quite a few years ago.

I was in a bar and asked what they had on tap the waitress rattlled off the generic:

Bud, Coors, Miller, and every version of Light, Ice, and Dry (what ever that is).

Then came Corona, Dos Equis, Killinans red, and Sam Adams.

She said domestics were $3.00 and that imports where $4.00.

I said I'll take a Sam Adams.

The bill came and it was $4.00 a beer. I said what gives? I ordered Sam Adams. She said that was an Import.

I said Sam Adams is made in Boston. She just looked puzzled, and said it was still an import.

 

[gbarnes]

I was at Bevmo a few weeks back, and two guys were looking at beer as I normally do.

One guy was telling the other about IPA's and how"they lay you down", etc.

The only problem was, he was saying IPA as if it were a word, he pronounced it "eepah"

Similar thing happened to me while in Peru a few months ago. I ordered a Greene King IPA and the bartender gave me a puzzled look, thought for a second, and then said "Oh, you mean an "eepah"?"

Shrugged my shoulders and said, "Yeah, give me one of those eepahs I've heard so much about."

 

[highgravitybacon]

This was a quite a few years ago.

I was in a bar and asked what they had on tap the waitress rattlled off the generic:

Bud, Coors, Miller, and every version of Light, Ice, and Dry (what ever that is).

Then came Corona, Dos Equis, Killinans red, and Sam Adams.

She said domestics were $3.00 and that imports where $4.00.

I said I'll take a Sam Adams.

The bill came and it was $4.00 a beer. I said what gives? I ordered Sam Adams. She said that was an Import.

I said Sam Adams is made in Boston. She just looked puzzled, and said it was still an import.

It pains me to have Killians and Blue Moon get the import tag. Becks is made in St Louis, but good luck getting it for "domestic" pricing.

 

[reinstone]

american beer (non-craft etc.) is like makin love in a canoe,
its f#c%in close to water!!!!!!!!!

 

[lumpher]

It pains me to have Killians and Blue Moon get the import tag. Becks is made in St Louis, but good luck getting it for "domestic" pricing.

my neighbor drinks shiner beer. shiner beer is made in shiner, tx. here in texas, he has to pay import prices for a "beer" made in the same state. to keep on thread, his wife tells me she thinks my beer "tastes too much like beer", and doesn't drink it, even though she drinks a fair amount of keester... i mean keystone light

 

[reinstone]

keeyster!:rockin:

 

[FunkyDung]

I walked into a small convenience store on my way home from work. I looked at everything in their selection and decided to pick up two bombers. One from Stone and one from Rogue. The girl at the register wanted to make small talk...

Her: Hey.. my boyfriend loves Rogue! He loves microbrews!
Me: Yeah... Rogue's great, along with Stone.
Her: There's actually a German beer here that he really liked.
Me: WHAT!? Where?! I looked at EVERYTHING here.
Her: I'll show you...

She led me right to Rogue's Irish Lager. I smiled, said no thanks, paid for my two bombers, and got out of there

 

[morticus]

I brought a couple growlers of my Black IPA (CDA) over to my buddy's house for a Christmas party.

Everybody loved it, then my buddy's ******* older brother chimed in and said; "wow this is too bitter for a porter. I think you got to many air bubbles in your hops and ruined them during the boil." I looked at him and said please elaborate, so I don't make that mistake again. He said, "every brewer knows you gotta keep air bubbles out of your hops while they're boiling." I said "holy crap I did not know that, and to think I've been brewing for 15 years now and nobody has ever bothered to tell me this!" I thanked him for the info and asked him how long he's been brewing. He said, "well I haven't brewed yet but me and a buddy were thinking about getting into it."

Needless to say everybody thought he was a *******.

 

[RCCOLA]

He said, "every brewer knows you gotta keep air bubbles out of your hops while they're boiling."

Every good brewer knows you need to keep a hop de-aeration stone in the boil. Geez!:smack:

 

[cluckk]

My wife and I went into a bar and ordered a meal and two beers. I find around here the only thing I'm likely to enjoy on tap in most places is Guinness so I ordered one. My wife ordered a Budweiser as usual. When they brought the beers my wife's Bud was very cloudy and when she tasted it she told me it didn't taste right. I tasted it and it was a hefeweizen. It was a heck of a lot better than Bud, but she wanted her choice. I called the bartender over and told him he poured the wrong beer for my wife. He said he didn't and that he had pulled it from the correct tap. I told him then he must have his lines crossed or something because the glass did not have Bud. He walked over to the taps grabbed the one obviously marked with a hefeweizen pulled a small sample and tasted. He looked at me and said, "No sir, it's Budweiser." I looked at him like I had just discovered the missing link.

 

[mcspanner]

My wife and I went into a bar and ordered a meal and two beers. I find around here the only thing I'm likely to enjoy on tap in most places is Guinness so I ordered one. My wife ordered a Budweiser as usual. When they brought the beers my wife's Bud was very cloudy and when she tasted it she told me it didn't taste right. I tasted it and it was a hefeweizen. It was a heck of a lot better than Bud, but she wanted her choice. I called the bartender over and told him he poured the wrong beer for my wife. He said he didn't and that he had pulled it from the correct tap. I told him then he must have his lines crossed or something because the glass did not have Bud. He walked over to the taps grabbed the one obviously marked with a hefeweizen pulled a small sample and tasted. He looked at me and said, "No sir, it's Budweiser." I looked at him like I had just discovered the missing link.

Lol just imagine what happens when he goes to other bars and fancies one of those nice "buds". He'll be sending them back complaining that it's too damned clear and has no flavour. Lol