Funny things you've overheard about beer

[liquiditynerd]

You should've just told him a dirty glass will do the same thing. He's probably used top drinking out of freshly opened solo cups though.

With the most serious face you can muster "I just sprinkle a little salt on it, and a little on the coaster to make it not stick" it's a Mexican thing.

 

[DrunkleJon]

"Ahhh....fragile....must be italian!"

Not beer related, but had a coworker who said "De-Briss? What the Hell is De-Briss??? I dont know no damn French"

 

[gcdowd]

Not beer related, but had a coworker who said "De-Briss? What the Hell is De-Briss??? I dont know no damn French"

De-bris? Is that when they put the foreskin back on?

 

[jerrodm]

not generally a recommended medical procedure.

 

[Krovitz]

"Ahhh....fragile....must be italian!"

I was thinking the exact same thing. Hahaha.

 

[McClellandBrew]

A text I just received from my friend:

dude want to hear some funny stuff? being the beer snobs that we have become, it was classic....kayla and i went to monastery the other day, i ordered a count hopula *(Bloodred IPA)*or a devils ale *(strong pale ale)* i said ill have either....this bitch brings me out a mother effing AMBER BOCK, an amber bock dude!!! and she says "we were out of the other 2 but the bartender said this one is really similar"....ummm hellllllllll no! i said "do i look 16 again? i asked for a quality, local brew and you bring me this michelob made, mountains are blue type of bull****"...i mean C'MON MAN!!

 

[luke_d]

I'm a beer merchandiser and today while working, a lady asked me for a beer recommendation for a party she was having. I told her that she can never go wrong with a good old Sam Adams Boston Lager. She then proceeded to say "Lager?? I don't think I could handle a lager. I'll just stick with Coors."

 

[JordanThomas]

I'm a beer merchandiser and today while working, a lady asked me for a beer recommendation for a party she was having. I told her that she can never go wrong with a good old Sam Adams Boston Lager. She then proceeded to say "Lager?? I don't think I could handle a lager. I'll just stick with Coors."

Sigh... It's just people jumping to conclusions based on "knowledge" they've gained from listening to the masses.

"Indian food? NO THANK YOU! Too spicy!"

PFFFFT

 

[drainbamage]

I'm a beer merchandiser and today while working, a lady asked me for a beer recommendation for a party she was having. I told her that she can never go wrong with a good old Sam Adams Boston Lager. She then proceeded to say "Lager?? I don't think I could handle a lager. I'll just stick with Coors."

I wonder what she thought a lager was...most of the people I've met who are uninformed on beer seem to make the associations that "lager=beer" and "ale=warm pirate grog=not beer".

 

[Billy-Klubb]

I wonder what she thought a lager was...most of the people I've met who are uninformed on beer seem to make the associations that "lager=beer" and "ale=warm pirate grog=not beer".

on the same note, I run into a lot of people that think "home brew=prison toilet wine" and "BMC=beer and "everything else=fancy new made up beer". you know, like stout/porter/bock/blonde.

 

[JoeyChopps]

I run into the same thing a lot if I mention any kinda beer other than bmc I get told that they are not condisours of beer they just like "there" beer.

 

[Billy-Klubb]

I run into the same thing a lot if I mention any kinda beer other than bmc I get told that they are not condisours of beer they just like "there" beer.

hahaha! the assumption that you have to be a stereotypical connoisseur to enjoy anything other than BMC or the cheapest party wine.

 

[unionrdr]

Read beer snob here. Even Craig mentioned on his last HB wednesday about the malt liquor crowd poo pooing us HB'rs like we think we're to good for that heavy sweet beer they love. Whatever floats your boat. I don't care for it.

 

[Billy-Klubb]

that's it right there, drink what you like.

 

[drainbamage]

on the same note, I run into a lot of people that think "home brew=prison toilet wine" and "BMC=beer and "everything else=fancy new made up beer". you know, like stout/porter/bock/blonde.

Haha, I know. My dad was like that when I first started enjoying craft beer. Somebody would bring, say, a honey wheat lager to a party, and he'd say to me, "did you see that beer? It has honey in it. Do you drink that kind of stuff?" (Make sure to read that with the proper tone of disdain, as if he had just been served a quiche with a side of tofu. )

Since then, he's warmed a bit to the idea. It probably helps that both myself and my sister's BF are big into homebrewed/craft beer. He'll at least try most things we come up with, and has even liked some of them, although I'm sure on some unspoken level he questions my sexuality for liking "fancy" beer.

 

[unionrdr]

Yeah...manly men drink real manly beers in manly places watching manly sports. Then we stand around joking & punching each other...sheesh.

 

[luke_d]

Seriously...it's pretty freaking manly to take ingredients from scratch and turn them into amazing beer.

 

[Billy-Klubb]

Yeah...manly men drink real manly beers in manly places watching manly sports. Then we stand around joking & punching each other...sheesh.

yeah, and drinking with your buddies is always a contest to see who can drink the most the fastest.

that was the philosophy of my old boss in WY. a bunch of us were in a cigar bar in Deadwood, SD. I ordered a Goose Island Bourbon Stout & ordered him a Matilda. watching him trying to chug it was worth the price tag. :rockin:

 

[unionrdr]

I don't see it as more manly to brew my own. But I guess you could see it that way. Just another skill set to aquire. True about the who can drink the most & still get home in one piece & no tickets. But I like the looks when I'm drinking craft/imported beers while they drink BMC's. Bdubs is a good place to observe such behavior on fridays. Better than cartoons!

 

[wooda2008]

paraphrased from a friend:
"I want you to close your eyes and picture something, okay? Picture that hot chick at the gym, the one that should be a model. She walks up to you. Smells like pine needles. really fresh. You're just standing there, and she pops a caramel into your mouth, takes a bite out of a pineapple, and kisses you. That's what heady topper is"

 

[rodwha]

"I don't get the hatred for Shocktop and Blue Moon. I'm quite fond of both of them, despite knowing that they're owned by the big international conglomerates so often called "BMC"...
It doesn't change the fact that they are easy drinking beers with some actual flavor- the fact that they're offered in so many bars and restaurants now does amazing things for "real" craft beer."

The first time I tried Blue Moon I tossed the orange wedge with a frown and barely stomached it. I was a Bud drinker then. I really like Blue Moon now, especially their honey wheat, which I've been trying hard to replicate w/o much success.

Blue Moon isn't my favorite. I'll choose an IPA, amber, porter, stout, etc. first, but there are so many places that a special beer is a Blue Moon, in which it gives me something better than a typical ole BMC.

 

[ReverseApacheMaster]

"I don't get the hatred for Shocktop and Blue Moon. I'm quite fond of both of them, despite knowing that they're owned by the big international conglomerates so often called "BMC"...
It doesn't change the fact that they are easy drinking beers with some actual flavor- the fact that they're offered in so many bars and restaurants now does amazing things for "real" craft beer."

The first time I tried Blue Moon I tossed the orange wedge with a frown and barely stomached it. I was a Bud drinker then. I really like Blue Moon now, especially their honey wheat, which I've been trying hard to replicate w/o much success.

Blue Moon isn't my favorite. I'll choose an IPA, amber, porter, stout, etc. first, but there are so many places that a special beer is a Blue Moon, in which it gives me something better than a typical ole BMC.

I drank Blue Moon for a while. It's not the best or the worst wheat beer but it started giving me really bad headaches, even if I only drank half a bottle. So I quit drinking it because getting headaches off one beer is pretty dumb. I don't hate on people drinking Shocktop either (although the IPA nonsense is pretty funny IMO) but I find it entirely too sweet to stomach myself.

If asked I usually recommend a hefe or proper wit over either of the two.

 

[Ryush806]

yeah, and drinking with your buddies is always a contest to see who can drink the most the fastest.

that was the philosophy of my old boss in WY. a bunch of us were in a cigar bar in Deadwood, SD. I ordered a Goose Island Bourbon Stout & ordered him a Matilda. watching him trying to chug it was worth the price tag. :rockin:

That reminds me of one of my coworkers. We went to a training class and at dinner one night I ordered an Arrogant Bastard. Fancying himself a beer drinking (he LOVES Michelob Ultra...) he ordered one, too. I tried to talk him out of it but no luck. I had to pour it for him. Then he decided to take a few quick chugs. That face was priceless :-D

 

[namyarb3]

paraphrased from a friend:
"I want you to close your eyes and picture something, okay? Picture that hot chick at the gym, the one that should be a model. She walks up to you. Smells like pine needles. really fresh. You're just standing there, and she pops a caramel into your mouth, takes a bite out of a pineapple, and kisses you. That's what heady topper is"

This made a tear roll down my cheek...beautiful.

 

[andycr]

paraphrased from a friend:
"I want you to close your eyes and picture something, okay? Picture that hot chick at the gym, the one that should be a model. She walks up to you. Smells like pine needles. really fresh. You're just standing there, and she pops a caramel into your mouth, takes a bite out of a pineapple, and kisses you. That's what heady topper is"

Man, I'm going to the wrong gym.

 

[BrewOnBoard]

Man, I'm going to the wrong gym.

When I was living in Berlin, the local gym had separate changing rooms but a co-ed sauna and showers outside the sauna. Problem was, at this particular gym, you didn't want to see ANY of them naked.

So very disappointing.

BrewOnBoard

 

[BrewOnBoard]

Funny thing I heard once (though I didn't think it was all that funny at the time) was when I offered a guest a beer while living on my boat in Seattle. I offered him a few selections from Red Hook and Pyramid, and knowing that he wasn't a beer aficionado I even recommended one and gave simple descriptions of each.

The response? "Got anything made in America?"

I was a touch insulted as I would happily choke down a bud light if offered at someone's house rather than be rude and reject their hospitality. I responded, "Ummm... they're both made less than 25miles from here."

That got a shrug and a "No thanks."

I've also been to restaurants where things like SNPA are listed with the "imports" and not the "domestics"

BrewOnBoard

 

[theveganbrewer]

Just got back from the store where I found myself face to face with a BMC drinker. We were sitting there next to each other at a floor stand of beer, they had a bunch of craft beer bombers on the bottom, some winter 12 packs in the middle and the BMC on top.

I grab a bottle of Lagunitas Cappuccino Stout and the guy next to me goes,

"Man, cappuccino? I couldn't drink something with a bunch of stuff like that added to it."

I said its brewed with real coffee and there are a lot of beers brewed with coffee. Its not abnormal.

He grabs a bud light lime pack and says "Beer should be simple."

 

[mgortel]

"Beer makes you fat"

This is bull$hit......its not the beer...its all the food we eat while consuming beer! Beer has no fat in it!

 

[turvis]

It is not the fat content but the calorie count that make you fat.