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I get some pine but a lot of really resinous citrus.

My pale ale is all Simcoe FWH and Simcoe dry hop. My IPA is Simcoe FWH, amarillo/simcoe blend in the boil, and a blend of simcoe/amarillo/citra for dry hop. It tastes like eating a fruit cup with a nice smooth bitterness.

You could buy a bunch of Thomas Hardy's and use the bottles. Or just only bottle 12oz and give out those... that's what I do.

Stevia and malto-dextrin IIRC

Seems closer to a stout than a porter. I'm not on my computer so I can't say for sure but of you switch to pale extract and use a dark crystal it should get you close. Personally I would go all nugget for the hops, I'm not a fan of amarillo in dark beers though.

Caramel and Crystal are interchangeable terms, based on the maltster.

I love my 3 gallon plastic carboy, but it is not a BetterBottle. The BetterBottle ones were cubes, I got a round one ordered from my LHBS.

You can scale it linearly but be aware that you might need to make some tweaks after you brew it the first time to account for the different losses that come with the smaller batch.

I use this same kettle, it loses a lot of heat through the sides and I got a much better boil after insulating it. The handles are sturdy but I do worry picking it up full of wort. Never used the false bottom.

I don't own a tube to put on my mash tun, never had issues.

liquor - "any liquid substance, as broth from cooked meats or vegetables. " It's for cooking food while you brew. Obviously.

My LHBS crushes grains, twice even.

You can get an aquarium sump pump that would work for $20-30. Just go to a good aquarium store and tell them what you need to do. This is what I did and I met two homebrewers that worked there. Just make sure you go to an aquarium store and not a regular pet store.

Nothing wrong with aluminum, there are plenty of threads (including a sticky one I believe) that talk about this. Please don't let this thread go off topic as well.

I've cooked in my brewpot and my food doesn't taste like beer and my beer doesn't taste like food.

Pour more slowly, i let the beer barely trickle out of the bottle. Finding a good medium for every beer is important though. That is a nice look beer though.

5 minutes in warm oxy solution and my SN labels come right off. Founders labels take all of about 30 seconds to fall off (a good solid stare usually works) but they are harder to cap with a hand capper.

I think they say 6-weeks in case they don't have what you order on hand. As I recall they are really small.

A lot of people recommend the side of the glass but seriously I have noticed a HUGE increase in aroma when I started to pour more slowly right down the middle. I typically get a minimum of two fingers of head, sometimes more.

For the head, pour straight down the middle of the glass slowly. Release those aromatics. Keep it cold and it will probably clear up some. If you ever make it down this way let me know and I will happily share a few of mine with you.