Wife sabotaged beers

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crawfman said:
So my wife decided to add a few flower pedals to 2 beers I have fermenting for Heritage Fest in St. Louis in June (not for experimenting reasons but instead, cause she was pissed at me). Ones been sitting for 1 wk and has since finished fermenting and the other is at 2 wks. I sanitized a utensil and scooped them out and resanitized the lids and air locks. Anyone else have their beers sabotaged? And should I be ok? They were in there for 30 mins to an hour.
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You need to find out what kind of flowers she used. There are some commonly used garden flowers that are hella poisonous: Hellabore, Monkshood etc…
I would probably filter my beer through her best sweater for something like that.
 
Aonghus said:
You need to find out what kind of flowers she used. There are some commonly used garden flowers that are hella poisonous: Hellabore, Monkshood etc…
I would probably filter my beer through her best sweater for something like that.
Click to expand...

Before I say something in SWMBO's defense, I have to agree with this... make sure she's not actively trying to kill you. It would surprise me, but those kind of people are out there.

Next, assuming it's a relatively benign flower like a rose petal or something... she is doing this in lieu of communicating because she doesn't feel like she can communicate with you. Marriage is like an international diplomatic relationship. There are things happening on both sides that the other side has no idea about. If there's no communication, it comes down to interpretation of actions. That eventually escalates and leads to either cold war or nuclear war. Neither of those things will make your life better.

There's a lot of bravado talk in this thread about how you need to wear the pants and show her who's in charge. Resist that. It's crap. Unless your wife is the submissive type, you are both in charge. You need to understand why she did what she did and work with her to correct her perceptions that led her to feel like it was appropriate or necessary. If something you did made her feel that way, you need to figure out what it was so that you can clear the air and make her understand why you did that - maybe it was something she did that made you do it, etc. There is a whole chain of actions and reactions that needs to be unraveled if you want to have a healthy marriage. (disclaimer: I am not a marriage counselor and my marriage has its share of bumps like any other)

That said, I don't see anything wrong with messing around a little bit. If the beer goes sour (likely the worst thing that will happen, unless she dropped foxglove or something in your beer) you could come back with "Honey, you're a genius! That flower you put in my beer had an amazing wild ale strain on it and now I'm winning awards all over the place! These monks in Belgium invited me to give a talk about it! We're gonna be famous!" (of course it's probably not true, but it might not be entirely false and it's funny)

But yeah, first step is to fish out the flower and post pics so we can all try to figure out what kind of flower it is. For example, these would be a bad sign:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Digitalis
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Conium
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Nerium
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Atropa_belladonna
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lily_of_the_valley
 
crawfman said:
I always begin brewing at 6 am or earlier and finish before anyone is even awake so it's not that process that bothers her. Still trying to figure it out.
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Maybe ask her?

Sometimes the problem is simply the effort they see being put into brewing and the lack of effort being put into them.

But regardless, I know mine would never be that vindictive to sabotage anything of mine... Instead she'll tell me whats up. I'll consider myself lucky.
 
Why was she pissed again? Or at least, why do you think she was pissed (which may be entirely different from why she was actually pissed.)
 
The next time you brew, just tell her it's your own recipe and your naming it after her.
Something like, Betties Big Butt Brew, Debbies Flower Child Menagerie, Karens Krazy Pedal Pint. She would appreciate you bringing her into your hobby.
 
The Op's profile says she's a single woman. So either he's lying there, or this thread is a hoax. Since crawfman posted about a rye lavender, coriander, rose hip saison here, wouldn't she know quite a bit about flowers pitched into the beer?

Also, anyone suggesting escalating a war with the spouse, probably never saw The War of The Roses. "When a couple starts keeping score, there is no winning, it's only degrees of losing."
[ame]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5ebv3i_9Ltc[/ame]
 
chocotaco said:
Before I say something in SWMBO's defense, I have to agree with this... make sure she's not actively trying to kill you. It would surprise me, but those kind of people are out there.

Next, assuming it's a relatively benign flower like a rose petal or something... she is doing this in lieu of communicating because she doesn't feel like she can communicate with you. Marriage is like an international diplomatic relationship. There are things happening on both sides that the other side has no idea about. If there's no communication, it comes down to interpretation of actions. That eventually escalates and leads to either cold war or nuclear war. Neither of those things will make your life better.

There's a lot of bravado talk in this thread about how you need to wear the pants and show her who's in charge. Resist that. It's crap. Unless your wife is the submissive type, you are both in charge. You need to understand why she did what she did and work with her to correct her perceptions that led her to feel like it was appropriate or necessary. If something you did made her feel that way, you need to figure out what it was so that you can clear the air and make her understand why you did that - maybe it was something she did that made you do it, etc. There is a whole chain of actions and reactions that needs to be unraveled if you want to have a healthy marriage. (disclaimer: I am not a marriage counselor and my marriage has its share of bumps like any other)

That said, I don't see anything wrong with messing around a little bit. If the beer goes sour (likely the worst thing that will happen, unless she dropped foxglove or something in your beer) you could come back with "Honey, you're a genius! That flower you put in my beer had an amazing wild ale strain on it and now I'm winning awards all over the place! These monks in Belgium invited me to give a talk about it! We're gonna be famous!" (of course it's probably not true, but it might not be entirely false and it's funny)

But yeah, first step is to fish out the flower and post pics so we can all try to figure out what kind of flower it is. For example, these would be a bad sign:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Digitalis
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Conium
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Nerium
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Atropa_belladonna
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lily_of_the_valley
Click to expand...

Yeck...too much. The way I see it, you have 3 options. DIVORCE! Or bang her sister...that'll teach her for wasting precious beer. Or just talk it out, but that's too rational. :mug: Good luck whichever way you choose, and no matter what post some pics if her sister is hot...
 
My wife is very supportive and never gives me a hard time about brewing, but one trick I use is to plan brew days almost every weekend. Then when a family obligation comes up, which they do/will all the time, calmly cancel the brew day and put if off until the following week. Knowing that I have no problem cancelling/rescheduling a brew day for family time goes a long way.... or at least I think it does.

But yeah, sabotaging your beer? There are deeper issues there and I'd be worried if I were you. It takes a twisted mind to purposefully sabotage a loved ones personal items, hobbies, food, drink, or what have you.
 
Schlenkerla said:
My wife doesn't like my brewing but would not sabatoge it. I brew on my own budget.

If she did, the house budget would be be buying me a stainless rig and it would be drop shipped to my new home.

In the mean... I mean, mean time. I'd be tempted to mess up her stuff.
1) Every piece of her clothing would have a hole or cigarette burn in it.
2) I'd grab every pair of high heel shoes she owns and saw 1/2" off the heel on just one shoe.
3) I'd bust at least one hook on each of her bras after i put odorless bengay on the left D cup.
4) I'd put nair in her shampoo
5) I'd dip all of of the light bulbs in garlic juice then screw them back into the sockets.
6) I stuff fresh shrimp inside the curtain rods in the living room.
7) I'd put her work email address on every porn website that I could find.
8) I'd make sure I have mobile remote control of her xfinity cable box with it set to record WWF wresting on PPV only during prime time.
9) I'd use facesniff to post MILF & Sugar Daddy's links on her Facebook Wall.
10) I'd brew beer on my new rig and think of some other crap to do to her.
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Okay... I think you can forget the first rule of survival. You'd play heck finding anyone crazier than yourself...;)
 
So this happened on Mother's Day?

curious if the OP has kids and didn't do something for their mother.
Not that that makes it right, but I've heard of worse reactions.
 
Keith_O said:
Wow... I guess I'm a lucky guy... My wife is just excited a have a hobby not involving poles and $1 bills...

jk,jk...
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That's hilarious! That's exactly what my wife tells people if they question how much money or time I spend on brewing. She says "He has a hobby he likes and it's in our house. It's not like he's out gambling or at strip clubs."
 
mwilcox said:
So this happened on Mother's Day?



curious if the OP has kids and didn't do something for their mother.

Not that that makes it right, but I've heard of worse reactions.
Click to expand...


Good catch. I think you're on to something.


Sent from my iPhone using Home Brew
 
satph said:
The Op's profile says she's a single woman. So either he's lying there, or this thread is a hoax. Since crawfman posted about a rye lavender, coriander, rose hip saison here, wouldn't she know quite a bit about flowers pitched into the beer?
Click to expand...

Pretty sure the default profile setting is single female. I wouldn't read too much into that.

However, flower petals in the beer? Seems like a lot of effort vs. say, spitting a big ol' loogie in the brew.
 
What, no ex lax? You got off easy. Your beer will be fine, just don't secondary it.
 
What is her hobby, I want to check in on that forum to see what she has to say about you and what you did to cause her to sabotage your beer.
 
wow! What an amazing article...I want to think that my wife KNOWS how precious my beer is and would only do something to it in extreme cases (i.e. - infidelity). I could see that and wouldn't be able to get mad but just your ordinary pissing contest? I hope that day never comes my friend. best of luck
 
Just a hunch though--not to get too personal, but as you did post this here--as I am someone who also has spent too much time, money, brain cells and liver tissue on the hobby... maybe put a few hours aside?

Usually if someone does something weird and passive-aggressive and pranks you to get back at you, they don't feel they have a very good way of talking to you.

Or you could just douse your partner's genitals in chili powder as someone suggested (yeah, let's not).
 
troy2000 said:
Okay... I think you can forget the first rule of survival. You'd play heck finding anyone crazier than yourself...;)
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Yeah, I get a little crazy when it comes to revenge. It takes alot to get me to that. All seriousness I have done most of those things to one person or another. To do all to one person would be brutal.
 
I spent four years in the Marine Corps we have tendency to radical when get foocked over.

Needless to say, I like to torment my high strung wife occasionally. She needs to be put in check. She's a crazy Irish woman.

She is disorganized and a slob when it comes to putting away clothing and what not. Shoes are my pet peeve and hate to trip over them. Occasionally I hide just one shoe for my amusement.

Just recently I got home before my wife and locked the door behind me. Twenty minutes later she was at the door unlocking the dead bolt. As she unlocked the lower lock. I relocked the dead bolt. Then relocked the bottom lock. This went on for about 5 minutes before she figured out I was on the other side of the door.

Three weeks ago I told her that I need some checks. She manages the finances reviews, pays, store bills and hold on to the checks themselves. When I asked for a book of checks her flippant response was get them yourself. Well we were out, except for the last set in the checkbook. So I took the check book. She called me at work after three hours of tearing apart the house asking if I had it. I said yes. She was pissed that I had it. I work several hours from home so she didn't get it until the following weekend.
 
I have been married for almost 29 years. Obviously my wife and I have had our issues and arguments in that time. Not once did I try to destroy anything of hers or sabotage something she was working on. I'm with the first couple of posters who think you might look into som counseling. I know it's just beer, but that is a messed up way to get your feelings out.


Sent from my iPhone using Home Brew
 
Clonefan94 said:
I have been married for almost 29 years. Obviously my wife and I have had our issues and arguments in that time. Not once did I try to destroy anything of hers or sabotage something she was working on. I'm with the first couple of posters who think you might look into som counseling. I know it's just beer, but that is a messed up way to get your feelings out.


Sent from my iPhone using Home Brew
Click to expand...

From that perspective, you also have to consider how much she knows about brewing, and I guess horticulture at that. If she tossed in non-poisonous petals like rose petals (which are widely used in cooking and beverage making), she may well have thought something along the lines of, "drinking five gallons of rose-flavored beer will teach the bastard!" If she was trying to ruin or infect the batch, there are many better ways to do it (the term "bucket toilet" comes to mind, as does the image of a five gallon bucket being dumped into the bathtub). I think we can agree it's unlikely she was trying to poison the poor guy...

I suspect that his absence from the forum for the past couple days might indicate that he's going out of his way to give her more attention and prove that brewing is not his first love. But maybe I'm just a romantic because I'm only 18 days married.
 
GilaMinumBeer said:
I believe this calls for chili powder in her underwear.
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Good Lord man if she wasn't trying to kill him before she will be after that.
but if she is trying to take you out this is like giving her 2 middle fingers on your way out
 
Yeah…don't retaliate, especially if you actually did something to legitimately make her mad. It'll just keep escalating without actually addressing the problem. Pretty soon she will be trying to poison you.
 

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