The Worst Place You Have Ever Woken Up At...

[Natdavis777]

Where is the worst place you've woken up at?

As for mine, it was a few years ago. We went out for one of my best friend's bachelor party. We went downtown. Hit a few bars, and we were all lit. He and myself are habitual line crossers. We went to a strip club but were denied. When we asked why, the groom to be was on the security cam pissing on a Jaguar (which was the owners). When we left, he thought taking off his jacket changed his identity, so he would get in... wrong. It gets blurry from here. I remember the last bar we were in (I hate the place bc its tiny and crowded). This was before 0300, because the place was still open. When I come to, Im outside (a back alley) cleaning crews are scrubbing mats, and Im standing on the sidewalk. I light a smoke and try to figure what the hell is going on. I speak broken spanish to the workers on what time it is and where a phone is (my cell phone is MIA). Im able to determine it 0600 and I call my brother to come pick me up. Honestly, I felt like I was in a 1980s NYC. Still drunk, I wander around the corner and find my cell on the sidewalk... My brother ends up picking me up and we go back to his house and crash... Apparently I went to the head and ended up sleeping until 0600 when I wandered outside. How I wasnt arrested is still beyond me.

 

[jhoneycutt]

El Paso Texas every day for over three years. Was stationed there while in the army. Eventually got to where I hated absolutely everything about that place.

 

[JohnSand]

My ex-girlfriends house.

 

[Tuigi]

El Paso Texas every day for over three years. Was stationed there while in the army. Eventually got to where I hated absolutely everything about that place.

I was at Bliss too (90-91). I know what you mean!

 

[user 163849]

Osan Air Base, south Korea. It was a temporary duty assignment in 1970.

 

[FourSeasonAngler]

29 Palms California.

 

[dkennedy]

Middle seat on a 747 (HKG > SFO), it was...disorienting, to say the least.
(I lead a boring life, apparently)

 

[Inkleg]

Your moms house............................again.

 

[SnakeRidge]

I've woken up on a lot of questionable furniture.

 

[JohnSand]

Well, humor aside: The greasy wet deck of a fishing boat loaded with marijuana. That had nothing to do with intoxication. We (USCG) seized the vessel and took it into port. But it was so dirty down below, roaches, etc, that I chose to sleep on a life jacket on deck instead.

 

[Tin4]

Went down to the coast once. Long story short woke up in an absconded RV. TxBrew was there.

 

[brew_ny]

went to the Limelight in NYC to see LA Guns

woke up in Manhattan House of Detention, what a great night

all the best

S_M

 

[arturo7]

The pokey

 

[day_trippr]

lol. Been slammed in local pokeys a few times in my life.
Much less humiliating than waking up in a sorority house shower...

Cheers!

 

[GilaMinumBeer]

A hotel in Washington DC.

 

[Billy-Klubb]

I've regained consciousness/composure under pool tables, behind couches, in random peoples back yards, rooftops downtown, alleys, houses of friends of friends, different towns. never woke up in a drunk tank. but the worst place I woke up was the basement of my friends' bar. it was 5-ish in the morning and all locked up. I couldn't leave without setting off the alarm. he taped a not to my head that said I could have anything on tape, leave the bottles and the Johnnie Blue alone. so I poured a PBR and a rocks glass of mid range scotch and cleaned his bar. when I was done, I went back to sleep on the pool table. when he came in to open the bar, he woke me up with a beer to start my Saturday. it wouldn't have been so bad, but I hate the feeling of not being able to leave.

 

[MaddBaggins]

Woke up in a flea infested, **** smelling motel in Mexico once. The chick next to me was horrid. Mexican beer.

Woke up on a park bench at a train station downtown San Diego with a cop staring at me. He said "you can go sleep at home tonight, if you can get up and walk away". Cheap beer

Woke up in my rack on base with my hands all cut up and blood on my clothes. Bacardi 151

 

[jeff13]

This may top them all. Back in college one of my girl roommates brought home a guy who was beyond wasted. It starts by me waking up to someone asleep next to me. I had a girlfriend so half asleep I thought it was her but then realized she didn't sleep over that night. I turned on the light and to see a full naked dude in my bed on top of the sheets passed out cold. After some not so nice words he woke up. He was so out of it he couldn't speak. I found his cloths outside my door. He must have went to the bathroom when they got back and forgot what room was hers so he pulled a naked man on me. Kicked him out of the house fast. Must have been the worst walk of shame ever for him. Weirdest experience of my life...

 

[Billy-Klubb]

me & my brother crashed a back yard after bar party one night. after I passed out next to the driveway, the cops showed up (noise complaint). they were checking everyone's IDs and whatnots. one cop, mind y'all this is what I was told, started poking me with his baton and everyone was all "Don't wake him like that! He wakes up swinging!" my brother yelled, "I'll wake him!" and jumped off the hood of a car with an elbow drop in my gut. what I do know is that I jumped up and punched my brother in the face before I saw that badge on the guy next to him. I yelled out, "King Nora Adam Paul Paul!" to which he replied, "Let's see your ID, Mr Knapp." no one got charged with anything but we all had to go home. the look on the officers face was pretty funny when I punched my brother though.

 

[gometz]

This may top them all. Back in college one of my girl roommates brought home a guy who was beyond wasted. It starts by me waking up to someone asleep next to me. I had a girlfriend so half asleep I thought it was her but then realized she didn't sleep over that night. I turned on the light and to see a full naked dude in my bed on top of the sheets passed out cold. After some not so nice words he woke up. He was so out of it he couldn't speak. I found his cloths outside my door. He must have went to the bathroom when they got back and forgot what room was hers so he pulled a naked man on me. Kicked him out of the house fast. Must have been the worst walk of shame ever for him. Weirdest experience of my life...

Something similar happened to me. A buddy of mine came over and we had a "few" drinks, he passed out on the couch and I went to bed. The next morning my roommate woke me up with my buddy curled up at the foot of my bed. Best I can figure is he went to the bathroom (which you have to go through my bedroom to get to), and then thought the end of the bed was the couch.

 

[mishadude]

I don't know how many lumens cops' flashlights have. But waking up on the hood of a buddy's car under an overpass in Austin Texas with one shining in my face, I thought they must have a million our so. Our buddy hooked up with a couple gals from an alternative lifestyle bar and left us hanging. At least the cops gave us a ride to the bus station and not the police station.

 

[StonesBally]

Alone in the woods at day break. The night before we were at a party and the cops busted it up. They chased us with dogs into the woods. I ran and ran and ran. Next thing I know I was alone. So is at by a tree. Next thing I knew it was morning and I was late for work. I had to walk a long way back to my car.

 

[Hamaki]

ICU with an endotracheal tube down my throat

 

[passedpawn]

I was at Bliss too (90-91). I know what you mean!

I was there, on base, in '65. Born there

29 Palms California.

There too, summer '88. Warm.

 

[passedpawn]

I woke up once with a bloody, bashed face and no idea how it happened. I caught a baseball bat in a tussle, knocked out cold, friends dragged me back to my apt. I blacked out the entire thing. Scars are still there to remind me so I don't forget now.

 

[Zuljin]

In paper hospital clothes. We were teenagers. Decided to get drunk in the swamp and go off roading. We got way off road, like took flight. I was, at some point in the 7-9 times the vehicle rolled, ejected. The least injured of my friends walked over two miles to call an ambulance.

With my cousin, which wasn't bad at all.

With another cousin's girlfriend. Again, not a bad deal.

In the back of a van, smelling like perfume. Cousins are a lot of trouble.

 

[jhoneycutt]

I was there, on base, in '65. Born there



There too, summer '88. Warm.

Wow you're old. Just kidding you're 10 years younger than my dad. Anyhow, any fond memories of bliss? Not many here. Not in the latter part of my time there anyway. My grandfather was stationed there somewhere around then. He served from midway through the Korean war to about midway through Vietnam. Helicopter mechanic turned pilot and eventually flight instructor.

 

[jhoneycutt]

ICU with an endotracheal tube down my throat

I think you're winning at the moment. If you want to call it that.

 

[Billy-Klubb]

ICU with an endotracheal tube down my throat

I think you're winning at the moment. If you want to call it that.

I was just thinking the same thing. I think the only thing that could top that would be: Waking up tied to a chair naked with brown gravy all over your junk. All the while being beaten with pry bars and someone letting a ticked off wolverine or badger inch closer on a leash toward your berries.

 

[SnakeRidge]

I was just thinking the same thing. I think the only thing that could top that would be: Waking up tied to a chair naked with brown gravy all over your junk. All the while being beaten with pry bars and someone letting a ticked off wolverine or badger inch closer on a leash toward your berries.

Sounds like Thanksgiving at our house

 

[unionrdr]

Well, first off, in my day if you remembered it clearly, you weren't there. I've woken up on a female friend's living room floor several times after a party. One time, next to a guy in his shorts. Thank God my butt didn't hurt! One time, after a particularly bad night, I too woke up in a hospital with a tube up my nose & down my throat. And a gut full of aquarium charcoal. Another time, I woke up in a wooded lot sleeping under a tree in the morning foggy mist in late fall. Long walk home to my Mustang. Another time with the Mustang Cobra II with my built SB, I woke up at home after alcohol, weed, blotter acid & ? My wife asked me where the Cobra was. I thought it was outside. So I got really hacked (still hung/buzzed over), grabbed my Winchester 12 gauge & proceeded to walk all the way across town to my buddy's house to say WTF? Even walked into a convenience store with it for orange juice. They busted me a couple doors from his house. I'm sure there's more, but....

 

[Zuljin]

Sounds like Thanksgiving at our house

I thought there'd be a Saint Bernard in that story.

 

[harleybug88]

Well, first off, in my day if you remembered it clearly, you weren't there. I've woken up on a female friend's living room floor several times after a party. One time, next to a guy in his shorts. Thank God my butt didn't hurt! One time, after a particularly bad night, I too woke up in a hospital with a tube up my nose & down my throat. And a gut full of aquarium charcoal. Another time, I woke up in a wooded lot sleeping under a tree in the morning foggy mist in late fall. Long walk home to my Mustang. Another time with the Mustang Cobra II with my built SB, I woke up at home after alcohol, weed, blotter acid & ? My wife asked me where the Cobra was. I thought it was outside. So I got really hacked (still hung/buzzed over), grabbed my Winchester 12 gauge & proceeded to walk all the way across town to my buddy's house to say WTF? Even walked into a convenience store with it for orange juice. They busted me a couple doors from his house. I'm sure there's more, but....

Wow! I remember doing blotter acid back in the day. Seeing trails and writing in the air with our cigarettes.

I would have to say the worst place ever I have woken up at, was in a hospital E.R. room.

 

[Natdavis777]

I would have to say the worst place ever I have woken up at, was in a hospital E.R. room.

I forgot about waking up in the ER one time...

 

[unionrdr]

Wow! I remember doing blotter acid back in the day. Seeing trails and writing in the air with our cigarettes.

I would have to say the worst place ever I have woken up at, was in a hospital E.R. room.

Well, with me that stuff made me do what we used to call "cartooning". Who ever or whatever character popped into your head from movies, TV, etc you became. Weird reaction?! I became the Hulk. The one buffy that gave us the "blotto" moved back to AZ last I heard.

 

[harleybug88]

Well, with me that stuff made me do what we used to call "cartooning". Who ever or whatever character popped into your head from movies, TV, etc you became. Weird reaction?! I became the Hulk. The one buffy that gave us the "blotto" moved back to AZ last I heard.

Yeah, I was never an acid-head, but did it enough to know what a weird drug it was. I remember sugar-cube, window-pane and blotter.

I remember one time trippin and playing pool with an old timer. ( I was a young mediocre player ) I was so in-tune I couldn't miss a shot. I ran the table, I even sliced a ball down the rail past the side pocket and made it. The old timer thought I was a pool shark.

I would never in a million years do it now. Is it even still around?

 

[harleybug88]

I forgot about waking up in the ER one time...

How could you forget about the E.R.?

Must have been a wild time...

 

[Natdavis777]

How could you forget about the E.R.?

Must have been a wild time...

Wasnt one of my proudest moments... Not a good experience to dwell on

 

[unionrdr]

Yeah, I was never an acid-head, but did it enough to know what a weird drug it was. I remember sugar-cube, window-pane and blotter.

I remember one time trippin and playing pool with an old timer. ( I was a young mediocre player ) I was so in-tune I couldn't miss a shot. I ran the table, I even sliced a ball down the rail past the side pocket and made it. The old timer thought I was a pool shark.

I would never in a million years do it now. Is it even still around?

Idk if it still is, haven't been into experimenting with stuff in a long time. But I have been known to run the table back then. Surprised the shiz outta my buds...

 

[hunter_le five]

Used to live less than half a mile from the bars in college. That gave me a lot of false confidence in my abilities to get home later.

One night after a halloween party, I got blackout drunk closing down some generic Irish-themed dive, got turned-around while leaving, and drunkenly stumbled over 2 miles in the wrong direction before passing out in a bush on the side of the road. It was quite a shock when I woke up later surrounded by foliage, without a clue as to where I was.

The two-and-a-half mile walk of shame home the next morning (still in my costume) was pretty amusing, though.