The "Dear" , "Sincerely" thread

[Colorowdy]

Dear on call phone,
I f*$#+!? hate you. I know that I will get eight hours comp time. I don't care it is Friday and I just want beers, buddies, then some boobies. So once again f+*^ you stupid phone.
Sincerely,
Guy who worked his ass off and is getting loaded next week.
P.S. F$&@ you stupid phone.

 

[Qhrumphf]

Dear Lamb Kabob,

Get in my belly.

Sincerely,
Hungry Homebrewer

 

[boydster]

Dear wild turkeys,

You wander around so free and without fear. You mock me, and for that you must pay. My best friend was taken by a coyote yesterday. She had eggs, dammit. There was nowhere for her to run. The man of the roost acts like such a cock but I swear he is just a ***** and hid to protect himself. One day, you will know the terror of becoming dinner. I have a hunch your time is coming soon.

Sweet dreams.

Sincerely,
Hen

 

[Fedora]

Dear Wifey,

It's been a stressful day. How about you make me a nice grilled cheese sandwich.

Sincerely, It's Been A While

 

[Inkleg]

Dear It's been awhile,

My wife made me a fantastic grill cheese sandwich earlier tonight.

Sincerely,
Hope yours did too.

 

[TXCrash]

Dear boobs,
It's been too long. Why are you attached to women that bring nothing but pain and drama?

Sincerely,
Damn close to being divorced. Happy being single, but want to play with boobs and not pay $20 per song, damnit.

 

[Qhrumphf]

Dear Damn Close to Being Divorced,

Why count on others for what you can do yourself? Get some implants.

Sincerely,
The greedy plastic surgeon in your town

 

[PackerfaninSanDiego]

Dear on call phone,
I f*$#+!? hate you. I know that I will get eight hours comp time. I don't care it is Friday and I just want beers, buddies, then some boobies. So once again f+*^ you stupid phone.
Sincerely,
Guy who worked his ass off and is getting loaded next week.
P.S. F$&@ you stupid phone.

Dear Cry Baby,

Grow Up

Sincerely, Dispatch(the one who called you)

 

[The_Dog_42]

This thread is broken.

Dear app developers,
Why can you not put in all the features of a main website? Like a "like" button.

Sincerely,
Guy who doesn't understand programming language differences.

 

[Scele]

Dear brew room scale,
**** you
Sincerely
The brewer.

 

[sfrisby]

Hmmm. My post was too controversial? Ok. Lesson learned.

 

[TXCrash]

Dear *******,
I'm sorry for what I ate yesterday that upset your friend, the stomach. Or for catching the bug my daughter had earlier this week. Or both.
Sincerely,
I haven't shat this much in a long time.

 

[WildGingerBrewing]

Dear Franm Zappa,

You were fvcking brilliant and im sorry it took me this long to figure it out.

Sincerely,

Shamed Musician that might never play again.

 

[CJ-3]

Dear Shamed Musician,

It's never too late to appreciate music. If anything this can only make you better.


Sincerely,

Someone who regrets not playing his own music anymore.

 

[ChefRex]

Dear Franm Zappa,
Must have sucked to be overshadowed by your famous brother Frank,
but at least someone got you.

Sincerely, Out of the loop.

 

[WildGingerBrewing]

Dear Chef Rex,

I was druck.

Sincerely,
FranK Zappa fan

 

[BigJack]

Dear Frank Zappa Fan,

Random lyrical and musical stuff that seems deep but actually isn't.

Enjoy,
Frank Zappa.

 

[PackerfaninSanDiego]

Dear Bears Fans,

We got your number

Sincerely, Packer Nation

ps.see the Bears still suck!

 

[WildGingerBrewing]

Dear Big Jack,

You obviously dont understand it.

Sincerely,
Musical genius

 

[Brew_Dude41]

Dear Bears Fans,

We got your number

Sincerely, Packer Nation

ps.see the Bears still suck!

Dear PFISD,
....
.....
........
I got nothin.
We suck.

Sincerely,
Bears fan

 

[BigJack]

Dear Cowboys fan,

Hope you enjoyed the first half. We'll try not to blow the lead, but we probably will.

Sincerely,
The Dallas Cowboys

 

[CJ-3]

Dear Monday,

Can we work this out?

Sincerely,
Me

 

[TheCADJockey]

Dear First Batch I've Brewed Since Getting Back Into It,

Time is up... I'm coming for you when I get out of work, and Hell's comin' with me!

Sincerely,
Just kidding please turn out to be okay, please?!

 

[hunter_le five]

Dear Sportsketball Fans,

Can't we just agree that you're all insufferable?

Sincerely,

Non-Sports Fans

 

[Qhrumphf]

Dear Teenagers,

Shut up. Also, aren't you supposed to be in school?

Sincerely,
Adult who wants to eat his lunch in peace

 

[Scele]

Dear Western society,
It used to be accepted to have 6 - 8 session beers during lunch, wtf happened?

Sincerely
Everyone.

 

[DisturbdChemist]

Dear Monday,

Why do you have to be a cruel biatch?

Sincerely,
Hungover worker

 

[motobrewer]

Dear Western society,
It used to be accepted to have 6 - 8 session beers during lunch, wtf happened?

Sincerely
Everyone.

the 80's. that's what happened.

 

[BGBC]

Dear work tissues,
Why are you so scratchy?

Dear cough drops,
Why do you taste so bad?

Dear sinuses,
Open up so I can just scoop out all that mucus with a spoon.

All Sincerely,
My face

 

[elkshadow]

Dear this thread,

Why are still in the beer discussion forum?

Sincerely,

Should be in the chat forum

 

[PackerfaninSanDiego]

Dear Tom Brady,

You finally suck.thanks!!

Sincerely, Jimmy Garoppolo

 

[Hamaki]

Dear Ken Grossman, Imperial Wizard of Sierra Nevada,

I like a lot of your products but I'm curious - why focus so much energy on events that try to bring all other craft breweries on board? Are those who don't play along viewed in a bad light by the beer drinking public? Are they seen as confidently independent? What's your goal in this, anyway?

Sincerely,

Not a big fan of the Beer Camp 12 pack

 

[fiveohmike]

Dear Alex Smith,

You still suck and are a bust, despite your 5 good games against bad defenses in your career.

Sincerely,

The 49er Faithful

 

[sloanfamilydsm]

Dear Vikings

Enjoy Alex Smith
hahahahahahahahahahahahah

Sincerely
Chiefs Fan

 

[rlmiller10]

Dear Untappd user,

Thank you for turning my hobby into an obnoxious hipster pissing contest. I used to love just chatting about beer and making it, now I'm expected to prove how "beer" I am by revealing my Untappd medal status.

Sincerely,

Guy who's last refuge from social media has been unfortunately compromised.

P.S.
Get off my lawn.

Dear Untapped user

Use beer citizen instead

Regards,

Guy that likes beer, not hipsters

 

[IJesusChrist]

Dear Sports Fans,

[ame]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VdzsxEKwCHc[/ame]

Sincerely,
Xavier

 

[passedpawn]

Dear this thread,

Why are still in the beer discussion forum?

Sincerely,

Should be in the chat forum

Dear you:

Right! Done.

Sincerely, Me.

 

[Dopeybrew]

Dear drivers in memphis,

STOP DRIVING IN MY BLIND SPOT!!!

Sincerely,
The guy who wants to move over a lane

 

[hunter_le five]

Dear drivers in memphis,

STOP DRIVING IN MY BLIND SPOT!!!

Sincerely,
The guy who wants to move over a lane

Sent from my iPhone using Home Brew in Heavy Traffic

Says the guy posting and driving....

 

[Zepth]

Dear drivers in memphis,

STOP DRIVING IN MY BLIND SPOT!!!

Sincerely,
The guy who wants to move over a lane

Dear everybody,
Let's not get on this topic again.
Sincerely,
Sick of it.