hunter_le five
Sheriff Underscore
Some of you may remember a couple months ago when, amidst a rather heated debate regarding the statistical significance of small amounts of Trans Fats in food products, brother Boydster issued the following challenge:
Feeling somewhat guilty about a hyper-intelligent-nano-dolphin-related dermatological mishap that I may or may not have been responsible for inflicting on poor Boydster, I volunteered to conduct the test:
Days went by. Then weeks. Then months. To be honest, after all this time I had completely forgotten about my hasty decision to take part in this test, and assumed the whole thing had been a joke on the part of Boydster.
However, when I got home from work last night, I found a single bottle of water sitting on my doorstep, with a little note attached:
Being a man of my word, I commenced the Great Experiment at once. I immediately called a couple of my brew buddies over to take part in a triangle test, and procured two bottles of Dasani water to compare with in the blind sample.
I poured a sample of each bottle into identical drinking glasses, and had SWMBO arrange them in a random order and assign them numbers. Only she knew which was which.
We then each took a taste of each glass, and tried our best to determine which glass tasted different than the others. As you can see, all three glasses appear to be indistinguishable with the naked eye. Following are out tasting notes, as transcribed by SWMBO:
Sadly, the results are inconclusive. I was the only one to try all three samples, because *apparently* my so called "friends" are cowards with weak constitutions.
Based on my tasting notes, I came to the conclusion that Sample #3 was probably the bottle with a statistically insignificant amount of urine in it (or "100% Urine-Free", according to boydster), only because it tasted somewhat different than the other two. SWMBO refused to tell me if I was correct or not, and now she refuses to kiss me ever again.
Tell you what. I'll add some of my urine to a bottle of water. It'll be a statistically insignificant amount, I promise. AND I'll even add a sticker to the water bottle declaring it to be "Urine Free!!!" You want me to send some your way?
....
Now. Do you want some of my pee-free pee water or not? I had my B vitamins today, but those will probably be statistically insignificant too so I won't bother with the "Vitamin Enhanced" sticker this time.
Feeling somewhat guilty about a hyper-intelligent-nano-dolphin-related dermatological mishap that I may or may not have been responsible for inflicting on poor Boydster, I volunteered to conduct the test:
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!! I'll even invite a few friends over and do a blind triangle test with a couple bottles of Dasani to see if we can determine which bottle has a statistically insignificant amount of Vitamin B.... And urine, but we can save that revelation for the big-reveal.
Days went by. Then weeks. Then months. To be honest, after all this time I had completely forgotten about my hasty decision to take part in this test, and assumed the whole thing had been a joke on the part of Boydster.
However, when I got home from work last night, I found a single bottle of water sitting on my doorstep, with a little note attached:
boydster's note said:Dear hunter_la5:
Thank you for volunteering to take part in this noblest of scientific endeavors. You will find attached to this note one bottle of fresh spring water. I will tell you that, per our agreement, it DOES contain a statistically insignificant amount of urine. However, the amount of urine is well below the detectable threshold, so per FDA guidelines, I am happy to say that this bottle is "100% Urine Free!!!".
I am eagerly awaiting the results of your triangle test. Happy tasting!
Sincerely,
Sir Thaddeus Monkfish Boydster III, Esquire
PS: The nano-dolphins have now spread to my nether-regions, and the rash is unbearable. With God as my witness, you will pay for this.
Being a man of my word, I commenced the Great Experiment at once. I immediately called a couple of my brew buddies over to take part in a triangle test, and procured two bottles of Dasani water to compare with in the blind sample.
I poured a sample of each bottle into identical drinking glasses, and had SWMBO arrange them in a random order and assign them numbers. Only she knew which was which.
We then each took a taste of each glass, and tried our best to determine which glass tasted different than the others. As you can see, all three glasses appear to be indistinguishable with the naked eye. Following are out tasting notes, as transcribed by SWMBO:
hunter_la5 said:Glass #1 - Crisp and refreshing, albeit slightly salty/minerally, tastes like mineral water
Glass #2 - Still taste salt, but it's subtle. Not sure if this glass is identical, or if the taste is merely lingering on my palate.
Glass #3 - Tastes like overpriced tap water, with kind of a chemical aftertaste. Not sure if that's from the plastic, fluorine, or if I'm actually detecting the urine.
Mike said:Glass #1 - Dude, what is this? You said we were tasting water samples. *gulp* BLECH! WHAT THE F***?!?! THAT TASTES AWFUL! WHAT IS THAT?
Glass #2 - F*** YOU! I am not drinking anything else you give me!
Glass #3 - I SAID F*** YOU!!! I'm GOING HOME!
Bill said:Glass #1 - I'm not putting that in my mouth.
Glass #2 - ...
Glass #3 - ...
Sadly, the results are inconclusive. I was the only one to try all three samples, because *apparently* my so called "friends" are cowards with weak constitutions.
Based on my tasting notes, I came to the conclusion that Sample #3 was probably the bottle with a statistically insignificant amount of urine in it (or "100% Urine-Free", according to boydster), only because it tasted somewhat different than the other two. SWMBO refused to tell me if I was correct or not, and now she refuses to kiss me ever again.