Let's create a pantheon of Beer Gods

[z987k]

Yeah, the Reinheitsgebotus lands, of which the 4 elder gods of Saccharomyces cerevisiae, Aquafina, frumentum, and Humulus *****us rule.

edit: apparently l u p u l u s is a bad word?

 

[homebrewer_99]

Yeah, the Reinheitsgebotus lands, of which the 4 elder gods of Saccharomyces cerevisiae, Aquafina, frumentum, and Humulus *****us rule.

edit: apparently l u p u l u s is a bad word?

Closest I can come up with is a lot like anus...well, that one took.

 

[Yuri_Rage]

Fructus - god of fruit beers. A neutral god loved by few, despised by many.

 

[Klainmeister]

Cascadius - From the brethren of hops, this strongman of the northwest is dreaded by many, loved by few for his overwhelming power and seemingly uncontrollable presence.

 

[Silviakitty]

Hydrometeria: Wife of Gravitas and Goddess of Divination in her own right. The ancient God tricked her into his household by the promise of an inviting bath; "Come, dear lady," he spoke, "the bath is warm (but not too warm!)." She indulged in her bath and was thereafter destined to speak the truth for Gravitas.

 

[olllllo]

Sufracta:
(The Goddess of Head Denial)

Evil step sister of Crystal and Kara (the Head Givers) who seeks to deny you the head that you so richly deserve.

Never brag about how Crystal and Kara used to give you great head (sometimes in tandem) or Sufracta will take the form of SWMBO and deny head.

 

[bigben]

Iodophorius: Born on the Isle of Iodophoria where no living bacteria is known to exist. Distant cousin of Starsanious, who he unites with in eternal battle against Septicimius. However, his appearance has been stained dark brown due to his jealousy of Starsanious' elustrious foam.

 

[cheezydemon]

Berry of the Cran bush Lambica - a poison used to sicken those who would make good beer.

Homebrutus - lesser god who carried the art of beer making down from Mt Hood and bestowed it upon the mortals he found there.

His punishment from the gods was to be chained to a mountain side, with naught but BUD ICE to quench his thirst, til the end of time.

 

[FatMonsters]

Clonicus - A benevolent brew god known historically for deliverance of famous brew replications to the land of homebrewers. Shunned by many brew gods for giving the power of re-creation to homebrewers. Hated by the spirit Formulaetadon who infects homebrewers with the desire to only brew derivations of largely acccepted brew styles. Clonicus is typically seen with a lesser liked but sometimes given acceptance at the eleventh hour, god known as Substitutious (the purveyor of options in time of shortages).

 

[denimglen]

N00bulus Collegius and N00bulus Underagius

Relative to N00bulus Minor, they seek truth of table sugar and Breadius Saccharomyces cerevisiae.


Bestthreadeverrrrrrrr.

 

[cheezydemon]

Bachus - the god of WINE needs no re-interpretation and has a place among the gods of wine.

 

[Bills Brew]

Yeastimorpheous: Sister to Brewthirstus. She reproduces repeatedly and then sets out to consume all that is fermentable, and finally to die. But giving birth to "Ethanolus".

However; Yeastimorpheous is tempermental: too cold and she will be sluggish and not willing to put-out, so reproduction suffers. Too warm and she will be energetic, but will produce the ill tasting bastard child "phenolus".