I have a few....
To my wife and my girlfriend, may they never meet.
A toast to nipples, without them, boobs would be pointless.
The tastiest beer is the one in your hand, the worst beer is the one you don't have, and the best beer is the one thats free!
This ones a bit on the gross end but....
If my dog could piss this stuff, and if I thought he could piss enough, I'd chain that dog to the foot of my bed, and suck his d*** till he was dead.
To woman's panties!!... Not the best thing in the world, but the closest thing to it!!
That's all I got for now, hope you enjoy them.