How to buy homebrew gear and stay married 🤣

[btbonser]

 

[Barbarossa]

My go-to answer, which I took from the girlfriend, is that stainless is good forever!

 

[Snuffy]

I tend to spread the explanations out over themes of vehicle maintenance, tools and computer parts.

 

[firerat]

When I first sold the idea of homebrewing to my wife I deployed the "Babe, I'm we're going to save a LOT of money!!" tactic and it worked to get my green light. But, a few years into my new habit hobby, my wife, seeing me opening a box with my, at the time, new 15 gallon kettle, and knowing that large shiny metal things cost a lot of money, asked me "So how much have we saved?" My deer in head lights response ultimately cost me a day at the spa. Jokes on her though, as I was not invited to the spa day I paid for, I brewed a...well I don't remember but it was probably halfway decent.

We've been married long enough and I have been brewing long enough that the only questions I get about new equipment is "That's going in the garage right?" as I'm not allowed to have things inside for numerous reasons, mainly my own stupidity. A woman can only deal with so many bottle bombs, kegerator melt downs, and weird smells before she locks you outside.

All in all she knows it's cheaper than therapy and it keeps me in the house.

 

[Toxxyc]

My wife's pretty much the same. My hobbies keep me at home and honest. Yet I really do spend very little on homebrewing. I use homebrewing to make money (selling wort) and use that money to keep upgrading. I also buy most bargains I can find and try to swing it for a little profit later. So far it's all gone well.

 

[VApatriot]

Man, it sounds like I got pretty lucky. My wife was the one who told me I needed to get into home brewing. She helped me pick out all the equipment to buy: kettles, burners, the whole shooting match to even include a SSbrewtech 7 gal. chronical fermenter (which is gorgeous by the way). I still remember the first batch of brown ale I made, she tasted it and said "wow I really like that one, what are you going to make for yourself, 'cause this batch is all mine". Sorry guys, try not to be too jealous.

 

[firerat]

Man, it sounds like I got pretty lucky. My wife was the one who told me I needed to get into home brewing. She helped me pick out all the equipment to buy: kettles, burners, the whole shooting match to even include a SSbrewtech 7 gal. chronical fermenter (which is gorgeous by the way). I still remember the first batch of brown ale I made, she tasted it and said "wow I really like that one, what are you going to make for yourself, 'cause this batch is all mine". Sorry guys, try not to be too jealous.

Technically my wife bought me my first kit. A Mr Beer kit she thought would give me something to do and get me away from some quasi-legal hobbies I won't discuss here.

And she was right.

I joke around but I'm pretty lucky. She let's me have my mad scientist lab and doesn't ask many questions.

 

[3 Dawg Night]

All in all she knows it's cheaper than therapy and it keeps me in the house.

This is now part of my HBT signature.

 

[Snuffy]

Man, it sounds like I got pretty lucky. My wife was the one who told me I needed to get into home brewing. She helped me pick out all the equipment to buy: kettles, burners, the whole shooting match to even include a SSbrewtech 7 gal. chronical fermenter (which is gorgeous by the way). I still remember the first batch of brown ale I made, she tasted it and said "wow I really like that one, what are you going to make for yourself, 'cause this batch is all mine". Sorry guys, try not to be too jealous.

Jealous indeed. My wife’s attitude toward my brewing can be described as grudging tolerance. She’s an occasional white wine drinker. Maybe a margarita at the local Mex. Coors Light or Mich Ultra if there’s nothing but beer. The only way I could get her to drink one of my brews is if it worked as anti-venom. I think mostly she’s just glad it keeps me off of motorcycles. Sometimes a manna gotta do what a man agotta do.

 

[firerat]

This is now part of my HBT signature.

Nice!!

 

[3 Dawg Night]

I'm a certified pilot, but I've pretty much traded that hobby for brewing now. My wife would always worry whenever I would head to the airport, so she sees my brewing as a safer and MUCH cheaper hobby than flying. Plus, as @firerate so eloquently put it, it keeps me in the house. A one hour joyride flight means being away from home for three hours, minimum, once you factor in driving to the airport, preflight, the actual flight itself, and the drive back home. Plus, I couldn't afford to fly more than once a month or so. There's always something that needs to be done in my garage brewery.

 

[Dr_Jeff]

When I got started, there were several "conversations" about how much I was spending, then I figured out to watch Craigslist and I would buy out homebrewers that were getting out of the hobby, keep the few items I wanted or needed, and sell the other stuff. I would always make money and hand her the profits. Sometimes I would group up items from this purchase with items from another and sell it together as a "kit". I always came out ahead, and oftentimes had money left over to buy ingredients to brew. I started making cider, hard lemonade and meads for her and her friends and things went even smoother. One kegerator, just has her stuff in it. Happy wife = happy life.

 

[Jhedrick83]

My wife (Just got married 2 weeks ago) is actually the reason I'm here. I've been back and forth about getting into home brewing for years. Even before I met her. For Christmas, she got me a starter kit and it's been a rapid rush downhill from there. I'm very fortunate that she's supportive as long as I tell her what I am spending and we even brew together some.

 

[Dland]

Hard to imagine my gal nagging me over buying home brew gear or time spent brewing. She has occasionally "raised an eyebrow" when I've bought yet another vehicle, but I don't blame her there. She's worried about my sanity, not money, as they are usually good investments or useful in the business.

BTW, I do save considerable amounts money home brewing, and she does not have to deal w the emptys (dump & recycling being one of her chores). She is into that.

 

[matt_m]

My wife actually suggested it too. I'd been searching out new hobbies after giving up one that took a lot of space we didn't have after the move from 10 acres to a subdivision. She's probably regretting it. I'd thought about it off an on as I have several coworkers who brew spread out across the country which she'd heard about. We remodeled our basement around an open brewing area so its also been a great pandemic and recent empty-nester hobby as we can do our own things but together on the weekends.

 

[FromZwolle]

this video is far too long. all you need to do when questioned about your brewing purchases, is ask if your significant other wants to pull up their amazon purchase history and compare...

 

[madscientist451]

I got into serious brewing when after I got a divorce, but dabbled in it before that. Never spent much money on it back then. I'm still doing it on the cheap with a lot of used kegs and other stuff, but not having someone who must be obeyed is priceless.....

 

[SMD]

My wife only tolerates my homebrewing, which is sad because we both were into craft beer so much when we met, we honeymooned in Fort Collins CO, drank our way through Denver and went to the GABF 2010. Now she doesn’t drink much, but I’m trying to woo her back to beer. She doesn’t give me much grief if I sell things from another hobby to pay for this one. So I’m trying to sell a rifle to buy an all electric system.

 

[Jayjay1976]

Still trying to figure out how to juggle my two hobbies, being married and manufacturing alcohol; one is a chainsaw the other is simple chemistry.

 

[grampamark]

My wife’s hobby is quilting, the cost of which makes the cost of homebrewing look like pocket change in comparison. She’s also the one who got me into brewing by giving me a starter kit for Xmas in 2010. I have yet to hear a discouraging word about the cost of my hobby.

 

[seatazzz]

I too am a lucky one. Been married 15+ years to a guy who loves craft beer almost as much as I do. He's raised a few eyebrows over a few of my purchases, although it's been a while since I got the inevitable "why do you need that when you already had this?", last one was a new false bottom for the mash tun replacing the one he bought for me 3 years ago that just wasn't doing the job anymore. Mostly I just get "you're brewing AGAIN? You just did a batch last weekend!". As many of us do, I have an ace up my sleeve; if he makes noises about my brewery purchases (any more it's just grain and sometimes hops), I just ask how many bowling balls he's bought in the last 6 months. Bowling ball prices make what I buy for the brewery look like chump change. And brewing doesn't screw up my bad knee any more than it already is. At the end of the day, however, he's proud of what I can do out here and will brag about it to his/our friends every chance he gets. Love that guy.

 

[Craiginthecorn]

Not everything is applicable, but several good tips in this video. Not sure how well this plays outside of the upper midwest, but it hits home for me.

 

[MaxStout]

The rule in our house: if a potential purchase is over $100, give a heads-up in advance. Doesn't mean the other spouse has to give "permission," just that the buyer let the other know a purchase is imminent.

So I place lots of <$100 orders from MoreBeer, Midwest, Amazon, etc.

She buys shoes.

Comes out even in the long run. Well...sort of. Who's counting?

 

[day_trippr]

I have had comparatively more expensive pursuits than home brewing - and that tended to take me away from home (eg: flyfishing as much of the world as I could afford. And, "boats"). I think The Spousal Unit should consider the last couple decades of my home brewing at a steady clip to be a win...

Cheers! (...though I haven't asked her. And probably won't )

 

[Barbarossa]

The rule in our house: if a potential purchase is over $100, give a heads-up in advance. Doesn't mean the other spouse has to give "permission," just that the buyer let the other know a purchase is imminent.

So I place lots of <$100 orders from MoreBeer, Midwest, Amazon, etc.

She buys shoes.

Comes out even in the long run. Well...sort of. Who's counting?

You should be counting. You have a disadvantage. Have you found the stack of shoes yet? Try to spot a monthly payment of around 60 for a locker rental. Oh wait, that too is below 100. You're screwed.

 

[bkboiler]

well...I've found the ask forgiveness not permission not to be a good mantra for staying married. That being said, communication is a balance...don't want to overburden your wife with every detail.
I just add to my brewery slowly $50-$100 /month tops...and if it a bigger purchase than that budget, then I squirrel it away in an envelope til I've saved enough.
We each try to spend a similar amount on "hobbies" but typically I spend more than her (since she has a dedicated "beauty" budget which is about as big). Try convincing your wife that beauty is a hobby...