The Dysfunctional-Palooza Obnoxious Masshole BS Thread

Especially if they caused damage.... That would b very painful

Yeager bought "Her Most Imperial Lee Ann-ness" a battery operated husband made out of Valerian steel and has been strutting around like he's Theon Greyjoy ever since.

You have been watching way too much game of thrones

yeager1977 said:

I assume you meant winches. As "two wenches pulling you out" has a whole new meaning

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I would have preferred the wenches....but yeah ....winches

Congrats on your new ride Paul! You and Alice should pop down for supper sometime soon... I'd love to see you guys (and the new truck, bring the truck)

You're not kidding anyone, Melana. You could care less about me showing up for dinner, you're fawning over the truck. .

(I understand, I'm the same way about the boat.)

so, brewed this years utopia yet?

paulthenurse said:

You're not kidding anyone, Melana. You could care less about me showing up for dinner, you're fawning over the truck. .

(I understand, I'm the same way about the boat.)

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Am I that transparent? You know I always love spending time with you guys!

My poor old Ram is 8 years old now.... I've got the 'new truck itch'....

Ask Paul for a scrip... I am sure there is some sort of cream that'll clear that up in like a week

Cape Brewing said:

Ask Paul for a scrip... I am sure there is some sort of cream that'll clear that up in like a week

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he did get it from paul so paul should know

There is a script to cure up that itch but it costs a ton and insurance won't pick up any of it. Just head down to the Auto Mile and start scratching.

paulthenurse said:

There is a script to cure up that itch but it costs a ton and insurance won't pick up any of it. Just head down to the Auto Mile and start scratching.

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Well, the old truck could always get "stolen" or "accidentally" catch on fire. Then insurance might help.

Am I the only one who is dumbfounded to hear that the Pentagon is just now figuring out that mortars blow up and kill people. No ****? Mortars explode? Mortars are dangerous? Really?

Who would believe it, the Marine Corp has been beaten by the f'ing PC Soccer Moms.

"Ohhhh, we can't let our little boys play with those nasty old mortars, they might get hurt. Lets everyone hold hands and sing Kumbaya."

Chesty Puller is rolling over in his grave.

Wow. How insanely random of a thought.

I can't imagine living in your little world.

Scary

Cape Brewing said:

Wow. How insanely random of a thought.

I can't imagine living in your little world.

Scary

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Of course then there is your world, a place where it seems like a good idea to stuff a pig inside of a cow, or make a brandy strength beer and utterly freakin fail after many months and hundreds of dollars. Don't act like you don't have problems buddy.

bottlebomber said:

Of course then there is your world, a place where it seems like a good idea to stuff a pig inside of a cow, or make a brandy strength beer and utterly freakin fail after many months and hundreds of dollars. Don't act like you don't have problems buddy.

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I damned near wet myself when I read that. I don't know you, bottlebomber, but I'm pretty damned sure I like you.

paulthenurse said:

I damned near wet myself when I read that. I don't know you, bottlebomber, but I'm pretty damned sure I like you.

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I've been lurking awhile, just thought I'd jump in for a sucker punch

paulthenurse said:

I damned near wet myself when I read that. I don't know you, bottlebomber, but I'm pretty damned sure I like you.

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Calm down, PTN. He's not ghey.

Brutal...

Cheers!

bottlebomber said:

Of course then there is your world, a place where it seems like a good idea to stuff a pig inside of a cow, or make a brandy strength beer and utterly freakin fail after many months and hundreds of dollars. Don't act like you don't have problems buddy.

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Don't forget what he's done to his 401(k) with his little "nanobrewery" plaything.

the_bird said:

Don't forget what he's done to his 401(k) with his little "nanobrewery" plaything.

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Eesh... We may never know what was going on in his head when he made the transition from being able to give craploads of his beer away for free to thinking that it was something someone would pay money for. Isn't one of his brews called Bongwater or something like that?

Oh hey guys... Sorry I am late, I was just at the brewery finishing up another IPA batch and then had to stop at the bank and deposit the checks the brewery got in today.

Whatta you guys talking about?

Cape Brewing said:

deposit the checks the brewery got in today.

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While it is unusual that you would have been paying into unemployment insurance with the nano-project, we all laud your foresightedness.

You should use less weak sauce on your posts. They get smothered in the stuff.

Cape Brewing said:

I was just at the brewery finishing up another IPA batch and then had to stop at the bank and deposit the checks the brewery got in today.

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As a commercial account did they still make you roll the pennies?

Nah... No pennies. We're making more than that. Not much more but more than pennies.

paulthenurse said:

As a commercial account did they still make you roll the pennies?

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Or did they at least make him take them out of the big burlap sack with the faded "$" on it?

bottlebomber said:

... Isn't one of his brews called Bongwater or something like that?

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Ummm, I was gonna tell you what the real name is, but I'm not gonna go there...

Good call

I guess that so long as you are depositing more than 200 pennies at a time you can honestly claim to be making dollars.

Good for you, Brian! Keep up the strong work!

Next tax season let's compare the income statements from my brewery vs your brewery.

200 pennies?

I WANT MY TWO DOLLARS!!!!

Cape Brewing said:

Next tax season let's compare the income statements from my brewery vs your brewery.

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Dirty Water Brews 2013

Income..................$0.00
Expenses..............$300.00
Net........................($300.00)


Bog Iron Brewery 2013

Income...................$81.33
Expenses................$45,742.19
Net..........................($45,660.86)

Do you really want to go there?

Absolutely... I'll go there.

... since you're numbers are assinine and not based remotely in reality... sure. I'll go there.

Let's compare at the end of the year... we'll even net out last year as well if you want.

Are you really expecting me to make a well reasoned argument based on solid facts and objective data?

Have we met?

Cape, he has a point. Hell he thought he could pull a 25' boat with his old truck. And I use the word truck lightly

I know... I just need to call his bluff from time to time else the lurkers might start getting the wrong idea.

I'm still waiting for the BBQ challenge, the only loser are the ones that don't show.

Cape Brewing said:

I know... I just need to call his bluff from time to time else the lurkers might start getting the wrong idea.

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I'm still trying to figure out the difference between "Dirty Water Brews" and "Bog Water Brewing"

That's easy..

Dirty Water Brews are the result of almost 30 years of home brewing experience and taste like the sunshine at the end of a leprechaun's rainbow.

The Bog Water taste is reminiscent of the effluent downstream from Bhopal, India and is brewed with many of the same chemicals.

Other than that, not much.