infamous quotes:

Stratotankard said:

Ralph Kiner (took some digging)

"The mind is like a parachute- It only works when it's open."

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That's a layup. Lily Tomlin.

"Father asked us what was God's noblest work. Anna said men, but I said babies. Men are often bad; babies never are."

PS, I am post-whoring the crap out of this thread.:rockin:

Laughing_Gnome said:

It's not important what I do. It is important how I do it, where I do it, and who I do it to.

Anyone?

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John Holmes?

I think you're making things up.

I've actually seen it attributed to Frank Zappa and some guy I'd never heard of D'Angelo something or other...

Post whore away, hehe!

Stratotankard said:

I've actually seen it attributed to Frank Zappa and some guy I'd never heard of D'Angelo something or other...

Post whore away, hehe!

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Interesting. I've always seen that pegged to Tomlin. Maybe I should look it up.

The constitution is like a retarded child with a hand grenade.....It is hard to understand, difficult to live with at times, and can blow up in your face when you least expect it.

Anyone?

shecky said:

I think you're making things up.

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Moi? MOI?

Laughing_Gnome said:

The constitution is like a retarded child with a hand grenade.....It is hard to understand, difficult to live with at times, and can blow up in your face when you least expect it.

Anyone?

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Must you continue to quote yourself? You are highly quotable, of course, but ....

shecky said:

Must you continue to quote yourself? You are highly quotable, of course, but ....

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To be quoted is wonderful. To be misquoted is both wonderful and amusing. To be misunderstood is normal. to be misinformed is to be a politician.

anyone?

"My dad made beer, and it tasted like crap strained through a used tampon. I agree with you to an extent. We are obsessed with sanitation, but for a good reason. Eliminate all possibilty of infection at every opportunity. Making beer (or cider) is like sex. It feels good. Having sex with a hooker feels good too, but it causes less pain if you wear a condom."

shecky said:

"My dad made beer, and it tasted like crap strained through a used tampon. I agree with you to an extent. We are obsessed with sanitation, but for a good reason. Eliminate all possibilty of infection at every opportunity. Making beer (or cider) is like sex. It feels good. Having sex with a hooker feels good too, but it causes less pain if you wear a condom."

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Stalin?.....

Close. Mussolini.

On college co-eds "If all those pretty young things were laid end to end i wouldnt be the least bit surprised"

Dorothy Parker

“I sincerely believe ... that banking establishments are more dangerous than standing armies, and that the principle of spending money to be paid by posterity under the name of funding is but swindling futurity on a large scale.”

Thomas Jefferson is the coolest

about his woman, "You ain't a beauty but, Hey, You're all right."

Another by Thomas Jefferson:

"I am lately become a brewer for family use, having had the benefit of instruction to one of my people by an English brewer of the first order."

Jefferson also grew hops for his brews in his garden Monticello. While his wife brewed 15 gallon batches for their household. Try to get a politician to do that these days. Most probably think it is illegal to brew!!

I really like this one, they were his last words spoken.

"They couldn't hit an elephant at this dist. . . ."

Quote "Of course I love children, as long as they are prepared correctly."

"I have never found a vice that I didn't like. I have never heard advice that I didn't hate."

I can make up crap like this all day long!

beerthirty said:

Quote "Of course I love children, as long as they are prepared correctly."

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guess, WC Fields,

Or maybe the grinch

A child is an adult without experience. A man is a child without a wife.

Laughing_Gnome said:

A child is an adult without experience. A man is a child without a wife.

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Troll.....

Sean said:

Troll.....

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An idiot is an idiot. A troll is an idiot on a mission.

"A Laughing Gnome is best placed in a front yard. Scares the crap out of the neighbors."

"Good fences make good neighbors"

Other lat words quotes.

"It's stopped."
Joseph Henry Green, upon checking his own pulse.

"In keeping with Channel 40's policy of bringing you the latest in blood and guts and in living color, you are going to see another first -- attempted suicide."
Christine Chubbuck, just before she put a gun to her head and pulled the trigger on live tv.

The ultimate beer is the penultimate beer. There is always room for one more.


Edit: I crap pseudo famous quotes!

The most a man can hope for is the love of a good woman..... The thing a man wishes for is the attention of a bad one.

I have 500 million brain cells. My wife tells me they are all wrong.

I am a post whore. .....That makes me one step behind a pre whore!

You know what Gnome?

As much as I like you when you're drinking...you're a pain in the ass when you are sober.

:cross:....?

BigKahuna said:

You know what Gnome?

As much as I like you when you're drinking...you're a pain in the ass when you are sober.

:cross:....?

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He's sober? Good God.:fro:

Sober is a condition of marriage. Drunkenness is the choice of a free spirit.

A free spirit is better known as a man with no job and fewer prospects.

here's a couple for ya:

Banking establishments are more dangerous than standing armies.

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Experience hath shewn, that even under the best forms of government those entrusted with power have, in time, and by slow operations, perverted it into tyranny.

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