I'm so confused that I'm afraid to venture into it..ha
So in other words, you haven't found straightforward instructions and are worried about making a mistake. I can understand that. Starting out always involves climbing up the "learning curve".
What you'll find out is that once you have a grasp of the much more simple "basics", all the other pieces fit into place SO much easier.
On forums you can find guesses ... you can find opinions; many of which are based partly or wholly on personal observations ... and you can find standard accepted practices. Standard practices are the foundation ... the basics, of wine, beer and cider making.
One of the benefits about learning from the type of format that is used in books or on a instructional website (such as GrapeStompers or Jack Keller’s site for example in winemaking) *rather than* a forum, is that they tend to present less guess and opinion and more standard accepted practice and procedure. This is a MUCH easier way to learn good basic practices ... whether wine, cider or beer ... than slogging through misc. questions and discussions and becoming wildly confused.
THEN, when you have a decent grasp of the basics, you will find forums to be much more informative and much less frustrating.
Pasteurizing, campden, back-sweetening ... just from your statement I can tell you don’t know what those are for. How can you expect to know whether to use them if you don’t even know what they are?
STOP reading discussions on forums, and instead find a document or a book or a website, that presents the standard method of making cider start to finish. There is a reason why textbooks are structured like this ... with all the information in logical order. It's much easier to learn that way!
Cider is essentially just low alcohol wine ... so you'll probably have better luck finding a website that discusses the procedure for making wine ... this is 99% of the way to making cider!
As mentioned above, GrapeStompers.com and JackKeller.net are good places to start.
Once you understand winemaking, then cider has only very minor additional bits of information to learn.