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A hammy, deli-meat flavour is almost certainly from the coriander. Anyone hoping to avoid it should use Indian coriander. I think that it isn't the country of origin that's relevant, but that Indian coriander is actually a different variety. Its seed has an oblong or rugby-ball shape, instead of...

Could probably do a mild.

It might be sensible to make a couple of medium-strength malt oriented beers that you can count on to stick around longer. They're a good fallback.

Old thread, but Wikipedia says that Distiller's Malt is high in nitrogen, so presumably that makes in useful when a lot of adjuncts are being added to the mash. Same idea as its diastatic power.

+1 to what bobbrews said.

Hilarious method and mental image.

If you think it needs a bit longer just give it some more time in primary.

"Considerably lower" doesn't sound like something that would be caused by a half gallon here or there. Are you getting the kits from reputable sources? Are you topping up with water? That would be a possible cause of poorly mixed wort causing low gravity readings. You could gently stir with a...

I hang mine up so that it drips out. It's probably not the quickest way, since I suppose you could rig up some kind of hairdryer thing.

I meant to say roasted pale malt.

I'd put the honey in sooner than the end of primary to maintain fermentation rather than restarting it. But given all the other flavours you're aiming to include, I doubt it will come through very strong.

You can get away with throwing it in the boil, but it's not uncommon to add sugar after fermentation is underway. However, I'd advise adding it when fermentation is peaking, rather than when it is slowing down. Also, if fermentation is vigorous, there is not much risk involved in opening the...

I think that technically, as ajf pointed out, the special roast and the dark crystal moves it a little bit outside of typical ESB range, but certainly not impossible.

While EKG might be ideal for the Scottish ale, you can probably get away with almost anything, since you'll probably only need bittering hops. (Of course, its not true that bittering hops add no distinct characteristics to beers).

You can add the extract and crystal at the start, but you can add part of the extract towards the end so that you get better hop utilization during the boil. (Hop utilization is increased in lower gravity wort). If you bitter with Magnum and throw some Willamette in towards the end, you can't...

If everything went to plan (which it seems to have done) you should get a delicious beer out of this.

Roasted pale is AKA Black Patent.

As some others have pointed out, your most likely candidate is probably milling, especially if you're not having any trouble with a slow sparge. Try getting a finer grind.

How's your hot and cold break?

I usually do 6.5g to hit 5.5g after 60 minutes. That way I can usually get about 5g into the fermenter. Remember that this means you need gravity points and IBUs for about 5.5g.