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Old 04-09-2013, 11:24 AM   #1
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Default If you had a time machine, what what you tell your beginner brew-self?

Ignoring any potential negative impacts in the space-time continuum and time travel paradox's, what would you tell yourself if you could go back in time to the day before you brewed your first beer or ordered your first kit/equipment?

For me:

1 - Buy the damn autosiphon. Now. Before bottling your first batch. While possible to brew/bottle without one, it is well worth the money.

2 - Wrap a strainer bag around the end of the tube when racking a dry-hopped beer to the bottling bucket, it works great and this way you won't clog your bottling wand with hop-bits, avoiding drippiness and wasted beer.

3 - The first time you use your homemade immersion chiller, don't try and save the runoff water in pots to use in cleaning. You will walk out of the room, forget, and make an enormous watery mess in your kitchen. It just isn't worth it for a couple gallons of hot water.

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Old 04-09-2013, 11:30 AM   #2
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1) Fermcap-S. This. Yes.
2) Buy a gazillion cheap hydrometers. Your elbows will break them by the dozen.
3) That stupid tradition of drinkin' while brewin'? Don't. Not if you want good beer.
4) No sexual favors for a brew sculpture. No matter how cute s/he is.
5) The clap is not the new "Brett."

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Old 04-09-2013, 11:43 AM   #3
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Start saving up more money!

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Old 04-09-2013, 11:44 AM   #4
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Don't forget to add the priming sugar. It sucks uncapping and recapping to prime.

Use the amount of beer you end up with to calculate the amount of priming sugar, not the amount of beer you think you will end up with or you will have lots of overcarbed bottles.

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Old 04-09-2013, 11:51 AM   #5
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Quote:
Originally Posted by aiptasia View Post
1) Fermcap-S. This. Yes.
2) Buy a gazillion cheap hydrometers. Your elbows will break them by the dozen.
3) That stupid tradition of drinkin' while brewin'? Don't. Not if you want good beer.
4) No sexual favors for a brew sculpture. No matter how cute s/he is.
5) The clap is not the new "Brett."
Haha, I feel like numbers 3-5 could all be part of the same extremely fun, but regretful, weekend.
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Old 04-09-2013, 11:52 AM   #6
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Temperature control is extremely important. 60-65° F for ales, 40-50° F for lagers.

The quick-disconnect posts on Corny kegs are NOT interchageable. One can only be used for "liquid out", and one can only be used for "gas in." Keep them straight.

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Old 04-09-2013, 11:53 AM   #7
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Start 10 years sooner.

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Old 04-09-2013, 11:56 AM   #8
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Homercidal View Post
Start saving up more money!
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Except for this, nothing.

It's been a hoot, and I wouldn't want to change anything!



and a lot of thanks to HBT.
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Old 04-09-2013, 01:08 PM   #9
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Quote:
Originally Posted by aiptasia
3) That stupid tradition of drinkin' while brewin'? Don't. Not if you want good beer.
The key is to relax and have "A" homebrew, not a six pack!
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Old 04-09-2013, 01:47 PM   #10
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I'd tell me to make a checklist and not worry all the time, because my first brew would be great!

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