You know your SCREWED!

[Aubie Stout]

When SWMBO asks me what I'm thinking about I usually tell her that I'm thinking i want to insert my (pick your favorite appendage) into her (pick your favorite orifice)

This either gets me lucky, or makes her leave the room quickly. Either way, I win :rockin:

That is f%&^($ awesome........

 

[Fingers]

How about the phrase, 'What do you want to do tomorrow?'

The translation is, 'I have something specific I want to do tomorrow and you have to guess. You have one shot. Go.'

 

[BierMuncher]

SWMBO stopped asking me years ago what I was thinking about.

Always rhymed with one of two things, meer or zoontang.

 

[shecky]

How about the phrase, 'What do you want to do tomorrow?'

The translation is, 'I have something specific I want to do tomorrow and you have to guess. You have one shot. Go.'

Ooh, I get this one a lot, only it's phrased, "Do you have plans for tomorrow?"

My stock response is, "Well, I did but I bet they're getting blown to hell in about 10 seconds."

 

[Bills Brew]

How about those two SWMBO lead-in lines that we have all learned to hate:

"You know I was thinking........"

And

"Let's talk."

You know, with either one of these, whatever you were going to do, or had planned to do, is about to change.

 

[gratus fermentatio]

Or, then there's the corollary: "Does this dress make me look fat?"

Ya, they NEVER ask: "Does this bra/shirt/dress make my ****s look bigger/perkier?"

 

[Kittyfeet]

On the flip side, how many men would ever ask their SWMBO "Do these pants make my junk look bigger?"

 

[Denny's Evil Concoctions]

On the flip side, how many men would ever ask their SWMBO "Do these pants make my junk look bigger?"

I am so using that.. when I have a swmbo...

 

[Kittyfeet]

You don't need a swmbo to use that line; just ask a guy friend after a few brews.
Make sure you have a camera ready so you can forever capture the horrified look on the poor guy's face.

 

[Denny's Evil Concoctions]

You don't need a swmbo to use that line; just ask a guy friend after a few brews.
Make sure you have a camera ready so you can forever capture the horrified look on the poor guy's face.

If the look is not what you were expecting, the camera might need to be on you. lol