Why is recreational sex the first to go

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IrregularPulse said:
Almost misread that!

Good luck. I suppose I could do all her chores, but then I'd be tried AND get no sex! Plus she is a teacher and gets home 2 hours before me everyday and only has 9 days of school left.
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Whoopsie-daisies. Ahem. Yeah, if that occured it'd be me that cuts her off! So, I definitely won't be letting her read this. Just in case she gets an idea.

I didn't do the chores in the hopes that I'd get a reward. I did those to prove a point that our child is more of a workout than any dishes or laundry and that those chores can be done quicker. That friday, I managed to sleep in till 10:00, got a beer buzz by noon (okay I got drunk), watched a movie, and still got all of the household chores done (laundry [washed folded/hung and put away], dishes, carpets vacuumed, dusting, bathroom cleaning) before I had to pick up the kids.

Regarding sex, I basically explained that she is going to have to make more of an effort and more often. And that I am okay with 3:00am :D on a worknight.
 
GilaMinumBeer said:
Regarding sex, I basically explained that she is going to have to make more of an effort and more often. And that I am okay with 3:00am :D on a worknight.
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These are my favorites anyway, the nudge, Hey are you awake, or being awakening by a "service". I try that on her and maybe works 1/100 tries. I wake up with a hand down' my pants...Buddy I am AWAKE!!!
 
IrregularPulse said:
These are my favorites anyway, the nudge, Hey are you awake, or being awakening by a "service". I try that on her and maybe works 1/100 tries. I wake up with a hand down' my pants...Buddy I am AWAKE!!!
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Ha. I've never been serviced while I was sleeping. And I have only gotten a couple rib nudges to show an interest. that was part of the discussion, that she has to do more to get things started because, like you, if I even think about waking her up for such a thing I'd have hell to pay.

I could be trying to wake her up because the roof is falling and she'd still bite a chunk offamybutt to tell me what and why so, theres no chance of me "nudging her ribs" to make my intentions known.
 
I could be trying to wake her up because the roof is falling and she'd still bite a chunk offamybutt to tell me what and why so
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Substitute "the fence next to the house is on fire" and you'd have a true life experience for me and a prior GF. I did manage to get her awake enough to move the cars while I soaked down the wall near the fence. When the fire trucks arrived, I sent her back inside to get some clothes on. She went back to sleep!
 
Maybe it was this forum topic but I ended up being awake from 3am - about 4:30am last night! :D
























oh wait, it was because my son is teething and I no longer have ear drums. Darn! I was sooooo close!
 
IrregularPulse said:
Maybe it was this forum topic but I ended up being awake from 3am - about 4:30am last night! :D
























oh wait, it was because my son is teething and I no longer have ear drums. Darn! I was sooooo close!
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Ahhhhhh. Good times.

I have those kinda nights coming soon too. Brutal! With my first we tried everything. Eventually we found the Baby Anbesol but, apparently, dentists don't like it (even tho' IIRC it's ADA approved) because it supposedly toughens up the gums.
 
david_42 said:
I sent her back inside to get some clothes on. She went back to sleep!
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I am guessing this is the reason she's the "prior". That is just insane! But, extremely familiar.

Wife and I were on a "working vacation". I was working, she was with me on "vacation". We were in a hotel. I woke up one night to find an odd , intense, orange glow coming from the window. When I got to it all I could see is the under construction, hotel across the street in a blaze. The heat was so intense I could feel it through the glass. I made a dash for the phone, hollered at the wife to get dressed, and had every intention of getting the f%ck outta that tinder box.

She got up, looked out the window, said "Ohh the fire trucks are already here" and went back to bed.

Geesh!

The next morning, looking up at the window from our room, you could see that the styrofoam insulation that backed the stucco finish of the hotel we stayed in had gotten so hot it began to melt and sag.
 
Want lots of sex with the wife and money to go take her out and get her in the mood?

Here's a novel idea. Don't have kids. It's not like its not common knowledge that having kids increases stress, decreases your money, and decreases the quality time you two can spend together. Alone.
 
Darwin18 said:
Want lots of sex with the wife and money to go take her out and get her in the mood?

Here's a novel idea. Don't have kids. It's not like its not common knowledge that having kids increases stress, decreases your money, and decreases the quality time you two can spend together. Alone.
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Yeah, great solution. I want kids, but I'd rather have sex and money, so let's skip the kids. :rolleyes:

There are times when there's not enough sex in my life, but I'm sure as hell not pinning it on the kids. There are days when what you lack in sex you certainly make up for in the sheer joy of being with your kids.

Some of us just need to find ways to work the sex in more often. :p
 
Darwin18 said:
Want lots of sex with the wife and money to go take her out and get her in the mood?

Here's a novel idea. Don't have kids. It's not like its not common knowledge that having kids increases stress, decreases your money, and decreases the quality time you two can spend together. Alone.
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Yes obviously from someone without kids and doesn't want kids (nothing wrong with that, if you don't want them please don't have them).

But as much as I love sex and money, I'd take 15 minutes of my son climbing on me and talking his gibberish to me, giving me his "kisses" (read: eating my face) and smiling and screaming when he sees me walk in the door over it any day.


As far as the teething thing, yea he has 2 already and they weren't bad. We've been waiting for this night as the last week has been a drool fest. As tired as I am, his little dual tooth grin is hilarious.:rockin:
 
Darwin18 said:
Want lots of sex with the wife and money to go take her out and get her in the mood?

Here's a novel idea. Don't have kids. It's not like its not common knowledge that having kids increases stress, decreases your money, and decreases the quality time you two can spend together. Alone.
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There's an evolutionary epiphany for ya'.

Having kids should in no way be an excuse to forgoing spousal relations. It's those relations that got the kids there in the first place. In reality, those relations are as good a adjunct to sleep, stress releiver, and general sedative as anything.

Honestly, couples with kids would probly have more sanity if they'd just make more time for plain ole' fvcking each others brains out regularly. As long as they have a substantial form of birth control!

As to the money, meh. Both the wife an I have demoted ourselves in the paygrade context to ALLOW ourselves the time to have a family. I know lots of folks who command rediculous incomes and are miserable because they have no time to enjoy the cash flow with the family and realise the fruits of that labor. They are just too busy trying to maintain the ladder they climbed for the income.

I'd rather enjoy my family on a budget than hear about it via a conference call. And while it is expensive to have children, it's not like it all has to be paid upfront.
 
I agree with what you're saying and your kids and family obviously bring you a lot of happiness.

I just don't understand why people are stunned that sex is the first thing that goes when the kids arrive. Your relationship switches from focusing on each other to focusing on your children. The relationship evolves to a partnership. Working all day, taking care of the kids, chores, etc., doesn't leave a lot of time for the couple to spend with each other.

Get a baby sitter, take the wife out and spend some quality time WITHOUT the kids. Reconnect.
 
Darwin18 said:
Get a baby sitter, take the wife out and spend some quality time WITHOUT the kids. Reconnect.
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Couldn't have been better said. It's important to not let your kids BE your relationship. Husband and wife is still the relationship. Not Child Raising Team. That is just one piece of the puzzle.
 
I guess I am one of the lucky guys. After reading these posts I realize that I am still getting more than the average amount of sex. Married 30 years now. Our one and only is 26. We had a very active sex life all along. He only caught us once. ( he didn't see anything but he knew what we were doing when he walked in) He still teases us about it. But we still take time for good lovin. More and more we just have "get your rocks off sex" in the morning but we still take time for more special half hour plus sex with lots of oral. She still likes to do that. God love her! In fact this morning when she left for work I warned her that I was gonna take her down tonite after dinner. She gave me that sexy little girl "OK" smile that I've seen so many times. She was oversexed when I married her and she still likes to get crazy and creative with our screwing.
 
Beerbeque said:
I guess I am one of the lucky guys. After reading these posts I realize that I am still getting more than the average amount of sex. Married 30 years now. Our one and only is 26. We had a very active sex life all along. He only caught us once. ( he didn't see anything but he knew what we were doing when he walked in) He still teases us about it. But we still take time for good lovin. More and more we just have "get your rocks off sex" in the morning but we still take time for more special half hour plus sex with lots of oral. She still likes to do that. God love her! In fact this morning when she left for work I warned her that I was gonna take her down tonite after dinner. She gave me that sexy little girl "OK" smile that I've seen so many times. She was oversexed when I married her and she still likes to get crazy and creative with our screwing.
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Don't really think this is the kind of stuff those of us who are deprived want to be reading. Thanks jerk!:D
 
In reguards to "relations", a wise man once told me:
-When you first get married its Tri-weekly
-After a few months its Try-weekly
-After a few years its Try-weakly.
Thanks, don't forget to tip your servers.
 
All kidding aside, you need to find your aphrodisiac. The following work for me:
1) If I look at a lot of internet porn, I get so horney that I actually participate in foreplay, like foot rubs and other lame stuff
2) If we fight a lot (which is a regular occurance), that ususally gets us going
3) exersice seems to get things going

good luck
 
MikeM said:
All kidding aside, you need to find your aphrodisiac. The following work for me:
1) If I look at a lot of internet porn, I get so horney that I actually participate in foreplay, like foot rubs and other lame stuff
2) If we fight a lot (which is a regular occurance), that ususally gets us going
3) exersice seems to get things going

good luck
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My aphrodesiac is being awake.

Hers, involves shopping. I think a hooker would be cheaper in that regard.
 
Wife went to visit the general practicioner and of course, he suggested that more activity and some weight loss would be the best medicine for most of what ailes her.

Now, she's suggesting we entertain each other a couple times a week.

Woot! I am gonna have to buy that man a beer! Of course, I'll believe her only after I get to see the bouncing balls.
 
BioBeing said:
I have an issue with the title of this thread. Recreational sex stopped when we started trying to have kids. That was about 10 years ago. 3 kids later, nursing, co-sleeping, sick kids etc etc. we have really only started (as of about 6 months ago) having recreational sex again. We both missed it. Try to make time - it is worth it.
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god dont tell me this..
 
GilaMinumBeer said:
Wife went to visit the general practicioner and of course, he suggested that more activity and some weight loss would be the best medicine for most of what ailes her.

Now, she's suggesting we entertain each other a couple times a week.

Woot! I am gonna have to buy that man a beer! Of course, I'll believe her only after I get to see the bouncing balls.
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Congratsa. A trip to Hospital eh....
 
IrregularPulse said:
Congratsa. A trip to Hospital eh....
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?? family doctor. Turns out she has an ear infection and her muscle aches are suspected to be weight related. She's not a big girl but, she hasn't lost any weight from the last baby.

I am both perplexed and thrilled to hear this. On the one hand, it prompts her to get jiggy but, on the other I like how she carries the weight. Her a$$ has never looked so good (asian's tend to have little in that department)
 
the_bird said:
Pictures or it's not true.
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The only pictures I have of my wifes a$$ are self portraits. She won't let me otherwise, becuase of these very suggestions.

She's seen too much red. And even if I snuck one in, chances are, that'd be the last of her pink I'd ever see again.
 

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