I pour the Vorlauf gently down the inside of the cooler at the opposite end to the valve. It will create some kind of disturbance but it won't affect the grain bed filter too much.
I have a coleman cooler and short SS braid. I vorluaf ~1 gallon then pour towards the back of the cooler.
I run a tight mill and the grain compacts really well and I by pouring slowly towards the back of the cooler, it doesn't disrupt the grain bed near the braid.
no
First runnings will be quite clear enough.
Recirculating slowly to set the bed and filter the wort is one of those traditions homebrewers have inherited from probrewers. It makes a lot of sense when you're staring at a 30 barrel pot of murky wort, and for those of us using conventional systems that still need filtration help from a grain bed. BIAB is an engineered solution to that problem.