Things about your co-workers that annoy you

[Grannyknot]

Blame him when your kids start believing in any god.

better yet, blame him when anyone else at work becomes lame as hell.

 

[Genghis]

I worked with a guy in SD & WY that tried at two different companies to get me fired for my throat tattoo. he said that the eyeballs in the skulls depicted the living dead which in turn was satanic and he was offended by it. HR at both places told him there was nothing they could or would do about it. he was one of those that used HR as a revenge tool. this is the "satanic" tattoo.

Can't be satanic. It clearly says "Hellbound" which to me implies that you haven't arrived in Hell. Since Satan is already in Hell, you have had no contact with him.

QE-MF'n-D

 

[Billy-Klubb]

On Wednesday I wore a fake moustache all day at work. Today everyone was asking why I didn't dress up today. People, it's because you expected me to.

 

[gratus fermentatio]

Awesome 70's pornstar moustche!
Regards, GF.

 

[Psylocide]

Day four of Covert tissue ops.

For four days I have left a tissue on the desk, for four days he has picked them up and thrown them away. He seems pretty pissed off lately, I'd like to think that my mind**** has played at least some small role in this.

I will soldier on.

I feel I need to update this after the events that unfolded beautifully over the past few days.

Quick recap, I've been leaving one clean tissue on this guy's desk for 2 months now. Every day they get thrown away and every day I put a new one on his desk.

I haven't heard a peep from anyone, him asking who is doing it, etc.

On Friday I was down in shipping and the guy asked if I had been messing with "Bob." I said no, and he said "well, you've been named."

Curious, I asked what he was talking about.

Apparently he has been going into "Bob's" office when he isn't in there and drawing a symbol on his dry erase board. "Bob" came down and confided in this guy that "someone" was messing with him, and he named me as a possible suspect.

At this point, I proceeded to laugh my ass off and let him in on the tissue operation.

He then pulled out a stack of post-its that had this symbol drawn on them and told me he was going to plaster them in his office Friday afternoon when "Bob" was out of the office.

Sure enough, he was working on it Friday when HR saw him doing it. HR lady figured, harmless prank, no big deal, continue.

"Bob" comes back Monday and sees it before the Monday morning meeting and stews for 2 hrs, wondering who it could be, and just looking generally pissed off.

Apparently after that meeting, he was offering people $100.00 to know who did it (he did not offer it to me, because I would've rolled on that sucker in a second).

After no one would dime him out, he went to the OWNER of the company and told him he was being bullied and proceeded to cry. HR called up the guy from shipping and they had a closed-door meeting.

At the end of the meeting he asked the shipping guy, "So are you the one who's been leaving tissues in my office too??!"

"Nope."

Didn't sell me out, my hard work did not go unnoticed and I can confidently call the operation a success.

 

[Melana]

Hopefully I won't get fired soon. I have been depressed about the current situation here going into 2016. I don't agree with the direction we are headed (it's wrong for my customers) and it is killing me slowly.

 

[wobrien]

I feel I need to update this after the events that unfolded beautifully over the past few days.



Quick recap, I've been leaving one clean tissue on this guy's desk for 2 months now. Every day they get thrown away and every day

Don't leave us hanging like that...

 

[Psylocide]

Don't leave us hanging like that...

My mistake sir, I hit enter half way through, it's there now.


https://www.homebrewtalk.com/showpost.php?p=7188908&postcount=2645

 

[wobrien]

My mistake sir, I hit enter half way through, it's there now.


https://www.homebrewtalk.com/showpost.php?p=7188908&postcount=2645

Wow, that's good work

 

[Psylocide]

Wow, that's good work

I just couldn't believe that someone else was involved in a clandestine '**** with this dude' operation in tandem with me.

If it wasn't for his coup de grace on Friday, I might have never known that the tissues were beginning to bother him.

Great success. A two-pronged covert ops mission, unbeknownst to both involved. It couldn't have happened any better.

I do feel kind of bad that he cried, but come on, handle your ****. It's just a prank.

 

[petey_c]

That's good clandestine operating there. Members of the cell have a limited knowledge of each other, this way when one is compromised he can't destroy the whole Op. I think that sometimes we're heading towards being a nation of p*ssies. Oh, Psy hurt my feelings someone else help me! I'm not saying resort to physical confrontation, but just say something...

 

[Psylocide]

That's good clandestine operating there. Members of the cell have a limited knowledge of each other, this way when one is compromised he can't destroy the whole Op. I think that sometimes we're heading towards being a nation of p*ssies. Oh, Psy hurt my feelings someone else help me! I'm not saying resort to physical confrontation, but just say something...

Luckily he still has no idea who was behind the tissues.

But yes, go talk to the dude. The most I would have said was 'that was funny, nice work.'

Get all butthurt over it and you're just begging for more.

 

[petey_c]

Double post

 

[CreamyGoodness]

Offices I have been in have almost always had prankees who had a sense of humor about it.

Favorites have usually included besplendoring the cubicle/office of the victim in princess or Justin Bieber birthday decorations. Nothing that causes harm or fear nor affects the victim's ability to get on a call or meet a deadline on time.

My wife's old office was filled with wingnuts who liked to superglue the phone to its cradle and then call the phone, so that the victim would smack himself in the face with the entire phone unit. That wouldn't work anyplace not full of idiots... they just use the provided headset instead.

At an old office I was in, someone put a box of crackers with the bottom missing on the subject's desk... when picking up the crackers, crackers everywhere. Crackers guy was the angriest.

 

[soccerdad]

Hopefully I won't get fired soon. I have been depressed about the current situation here going into 2016. I don't agree with the direction we are headed (it's wrong for my customers) and it is killing me slowly.

Hoping that things turn around for you. Work should not always be fun, but it should be challenging, rewarding, interesting, exciting, and the benefits should outweigh the anxiety.

 

[Renegades_Brew]

Hoping that things turn around for you. Work should not always be fun, but it should be challenging, rewarding, interesting, exciting, and the benefits should outweigh the anxiety.

Exact reason I am hoping a potential position actually comes to be a reality at a company I already freelance with. It's bad when the only thing getting you through the week is knowing that the freelance gig on the weekend is worth waiting for.

 

[Rhumbline]

Luckily he still has no idea who was behind the tissues.

But yes, go talk to the dude. The most I would have said was 'that was funny, nice work.'

Get all butthurt over it and you're just begging for more.

I just found out that a guy I work with got canned last Friday. He was marginally competent but in his dept that was scoring pretty high.

I rode him pretty hard on several occasions because I had to depend on him getting info to me and he consistently failed.

I knew he had adopted eight kids, found out today that the oldest got arrested for something, his wife bailed on him and the kids and is demanding a divorce, and now he's unemployed.

And I feel like an ass for needlessly adding to his grief.

If your coworker burst out in tears because of post-it notes and a clean tissue, he's probably got stuff going on elsewhere in his life.

If you see him coming into work carrying a duffel bag, run.

 

[Onkel_Udo]

I regularly have folks ask me questions about our employer's (we are all seconded contractors) very substandard systems and processes. So much so that I have built "pictures and arrows" explanations of the more common questions/issues. I send these out once a quarter with an invite to an open session in a conference room to go over questions. No one ever shows.

Each closing week (just finished one) I get an average of 8-9 calls about one of these issues. I stop each discussion in about two sentences "let me send you the graphic guide, review it and call me back if you still have questions". Almost all folks just shoot me a text after but one particular individual responds each time "Why can't we just discuss this...I never read those emails so I won't understand it."

I really do live to serve and a huge part of my job is training these folks. She just pushes every button. I spent 11 years learning not to interrupt people when I knew where they were going and just summing up their soliloquies in in one sentence (really bad habit) so it bothers me when she won't let me finish a 3-sentence explanation without interrupting. I do have a temper but it very rarely surfaces...this is one of those times. So my ex-wife taught me to to just walk away, mid-sentence if required, to avoid my "cutting wit and tendency to pick people apart in public setting when they have crossed me". So I did just that.

She reported me to our mutual boss. He brought it up in a performance review. My response was simply "I walked away from hallway confrontation before it escalated." He totally understood.

She now does not understand why I will not respond to her calls. If I do not have an IM or email trail, I will not exchange more than pleasantries with her without witnesses. She asked me once if I was screening her calls and I answered honestly, "No, I prefer to do business via formats that produce a record of the exchange. I just rarely answer the phone and never during a reporting run.

She called me twice in the last three days...both times during reporting runs.

 

[Rhumbline]

For some reason today I remembered one guy from several years ago. I'm not exaggerating when I say the he ended every single sentence with this nervous, maniacal giggle...

even if it was just "good morning... hahahaHAHAha".

When he left, the office manager told me to take his laptop and do a restore to wipe it.

I opened the laptop and he had written in black sharpie "Double click to open" with an arrow pointing to the left mouse button, and "Click to copy or paste" with an arrow to the right mouse button.

He was a Civil Engineer. a college graduate.

 

[SharonaZamboni]

For some reason today I remembered one guy from several years ago. I'm not exaggerating when I say the he ended every single sentence with this nervous, maniacal giggle...



even if it was just "good morning... hahahaHAHAha".



When he left, the office manager told me to take his laptop and do a restore to wipe it.



I opened the laptop and he had written in black sharpie "Double click to open" with an arrow pointing to the left mouse button, and "Click to copy or paste" with an arrow to the right mouse button.



He was a Civil Engineer. a college graduate.

Maybe Asperger's syndrome?

 

[Rhumbline]

Maybe Asperger's syndrome?

I hadn't thought about it, but yeah, he did have some other peculiarities.

 

[dkwolf]

For some reason today I remembered one guy from several years ago. I'm not exaggerating when I say the he ended every single sentence with this nervous, maniacal giggle...

even if it was just "good morning... hahahaHAHAha".

When he left, the office manager told me to take his laptop and do a restore to wipe it.

I opened the laptop and he had written in black sharpie "Double click to open" with an arrow pointing to the left mouse button, and "Click to copy or paste" with an arrow to the right mouse button.

He was a Civil Engineer. a college graduate.

At 36, I am part of the first generation to have had computers in school my entire academic career. Granted, the first ones were green-screen monsters with cassette tape drives, but I do remember working on them some in 1st or 2nd grade.

People my age that have only rudimentary computer skills amuse me. We've had to use computers for just about everything we do since middle school, and you've never bothered to learn more about them than how to turn them on and open Word?

However, people YOUNGER than me with those same rudimentary skills annoy and piss me off. Kids coming out of college that can't do anything more than word processing, email, and facebook?!?!?!! For the love of crap, you've grown up in a world where damn near every home has at least one computer in it, and you don't know how to troubleshoot a problem with it?


And to top that off, engineers graduating from a civil engineering program, that don't have a clue how to use AutoCAD. What the hell good are you if you are 100% dependent on someone else to do all of your drawings???

 

[dkwolf]

I just found out that a guy I work with got canned last Friday. He was marginally competent but in his dept that was scoring pretty high.

I rode him pretty hard on several occasions because I had to depend on him getting info to me and he consistently failed.

I knew he had adopted eight kids, found out today that the oldest got arrested for something, his wife bailed on him and the kids and is demanding a divorce, and now he's unemployed.

And I feel like an ass for needlessly adding to his grief.

Sounds familiar. I've indirectly had a part in the firing of at least two coworkers; same type of situation. Before the first one was hired, I was one of the lead GIS technicians in our company, mostly self-taught. I'd had two introductory-level classes, and everything else came from 8 years of using the software. First guy is hired on, resume says he has a masters degree in GIS. His first day, he's asking me questions that are literally Week 1 GIS 101 material. At the end of his second week, my boss asked how things were going... the prolonged facepalm set the stage, and the kid didn't make it two months. (and come to find out, it wasn't a masters degree, it was a masters certificate. And he hadn't actually EARNED it yet, he had part of a class left...)

Second guy comes on board, initially appears to be a decent guy with a fairly well-rounded toolset.. until I introduce a new process to him. No capacity for analysis, all he did was hammer through the steps. Never mind that step 7 gave you bad results, keep hammering on to step 15 and then question why your map looks funny. A long phone discussion with his manager one afternoon, and four months later he's out the door, with a new home mortgage and an 8 month old kid in the house. I feel bad for him, I really do - I liked the guy. But he just couldn't cut it.

(The first guy? **** him. He was a flippin' idiot. I'm amazed he could walk and breathe at the same time.)

 

[n240sxguy]

That's good clandestine operating there. Members of the cell have a limited knowledge of each other, this way when one is compromised he can't destroy the whole Op. I think that sometimes we're heading towards being a nation of p*ssies. Oh, Psy hurt my feelings someone else help me! I'm not saying resort to physical confrontation, but just say something...

You think we're headed toward that? I'm pretty sure we've hit 3rd or 4th gear on that on. Sadly, none of the newly formed p*ssies will understand a manual transmission comment either. Sad days ahead indeed. Sad sad.

 

[n240sxguy]

Luckily he still has no idea who was behind the tissues.

But yes, go talk to the dude. The most I would have said was 'that was funny, nice work.'

Get all butthurt over it and you're just begging for more.

My shift is known as the shark tank. The best way to survive is to cut yourself before someone else does, and then let it roll off you. If anything sticks, it's gonna get messed with more. Great prank by the way. Too bad the second operative was caught.

 

[MaxStout]

and come to find out, it wasn't a masters degree, it was a masters certificate. And he hadn't actually EARNED it yet, he had part of a class left...)

A master's certificate? Oh good lord, is this some new crap concocted by these for-profit diploma mills that seem to pop up everywhere like mushrooms? :smack:

 

[n240sxguy]

A master's certificate? Oh good lord, is this some new crap concocted by these for-profit diploma mills that seem to pop up everywhere like mushrooms? :smack:

A guy at work swears he has an engineering degree of some variety that's never been offered at the school he claims to have gotten it. I went to that school. They have two engineering programs, neither are the one he said he got. They have an engineering technology program, but he says that wasn't it. Not like a school to just abandon an engineering program is it? This is also the same guy that swears he bought a tv at Lowes, and his old school watchman got better reception when we went to 3G.

 

[MaxStout]

A guy at work swears he has an engineering degree of some variety that's never been offered at the school he claims to have gotten it. I went to that school. They have two engineering programs, neither are the one he said he got. They have an engineering technology program, but he says that wasn't it. Not like a school to just abandon an engineering program is it? This is also the same guy that swears he bought a tv at Lowes, and his old school watchman got better reception when we went to 3G.

Ask him if his engineering degree was granted from an ABET-accredited institution. That will probably end the discussion rather quickly.

 

[slym2none]

Our 60 year old graphic designer (yeah... wtf is right) talks to herself all day and randomly lets out a maniacal cackle. Place is creepy man.

I was just talking to the mouse I was letting out of the trap. Y'know, dumping the mouse-corpse in the trash. I always tell them that if they could pay rent, this wouldn't happen.



-slym

 

[Pkrd]

If your coworker burst out in tears because of post-it notes and a clean tissue, he's probably got stuff going on elsewhere in his life.

Yeah theres probably some bad stuff going on there.