The Dysfunctional-Palooza Obnoxious Masshole BS Thread

[bluemoose]

I'm still waiting for the BBQ challenge, the only loser are the ones that don't show.

And those that need to eat the deep fried pork.

 

[Cape Brewing]

You guys need some new material

 

[the_bird]

Dudes. I just found out there's a 30-tap pub, all local micros, opening on May 1st, within a couple hundred yards of the house. How the hell does this kind of vital information escape me?

 

[Cape Brewing]

You're limited literacy level???

I'm totally guessing.

 

[paulthenurse]

Road trip.

Is my room finished?

 

[ComcastWineRookie]

im sure he will build a "shed" in the backyard, and by "shed" I mean outhouse cesspool

 

[Melana]

I'm still waiting for the BBQ challenge, the only loser are the ones that don't show.

BBQ challenge? I would step up for that!

 

[Cape Brewing]

BBQ challenge? I would step up for that!

Paul's been ducking me for over a year. I dont see it happening

 

[paulthenurse]

Ok, you've been flapping your trap about how I'm somehow afraid to go pig vs pig with you for way too long. Bring it on, ******. Lets pick a day, invite everyone we know and just do it. I consider you a friend and I'm going to feel bad about it but I am SO going to leave you standing there pants less. Just remember, when everyone is standing there looking at you and laughing, you brought it on yourself.

 

[Cape Brewing]

You make me laugh on a consistant basis.

 

[paulthenurse]

Who's ducking now?

 

[Cape Brewing]

Haha... When did I say I wasn't accepting the challenge??

 

[yeager1977]

But you also never said you would accept the challenge either.

 

[the_bird]

It's like BBQ Pitmasters - South Shore. Maybe we can get Vince Wilfork and his lovely wife Bianca to judge.

 

[paulthenurse]

It's like BBQ Pitmasters - South Shore.

We're both obnoxious, caustic and narcissistic, can we stand to have TWO Myron's competing against each other?

 

[the_bird]

I need to get a smoker of some kind. I looked at the one that Cape recommended to me, but I'm not sure I can get behind going electric. I just picture Myron looking at that thing, slowly shaking his head with a dismissive frown on his face. I've got a nice built-in propane grill, but my charcoal grill got thunder****ed by a 150-pound chubnk of ice at the old house, and I've held off on replacing it because I know the ones I see at The Depot are junk that will rust out in two seasons.

Other than getting an old oil tank and cutting it up, any recommendations?

 

[paulthenurse]

Look at the Horizon Ranger smoker at BPS, model #164048RS. I get giddy whenever I see it.

 

[bluemoose]

I have an electric. There is nothing wrong with it. It is easy to use, not as much work, and there is nothing better than having a remote. Who wants to constantly check the smoker in the cold winter? Smoker temp and internal temp from the couch, nothing better.

 

[bob1852]

I like my Weber Smokey Mountain. Charcoal, holds temp well (even in cold weather), small footprint, surprisingly large cooking capacity for its size, and it's a fecking Weber.

 

[the_bird]

I have an electric. There is nothing wrong with it. It is easy to use, not as much work, and there is nothing better than having a remote. Who wants to constantly check the smoker in the cold winter? Smoker temp and internal temp from the couch, nothing better.

Understood. I'm not saying my hesitation to go electric is completely rational. Electric's probably the best choice for smoking malt, since it seems like it's got to be easier to keep the temp on the low side. And I've got an outlet right there on the patio, so it would be all kinds of convenient.

But... fire good! Ooooga oooga!

 

[paulthenurse]

Hey, I'm with you on that. Fire is good, and Ibelieve, based on nothing more scientific than opinion, that smoke from a fire is better than smoke from an electric element. That said, I own an electric and use it a ton. It's great. But you'll pop a chub when you cast your eyes on that one I mentioned before. And it weighs a friggin' ton, it's made out of plate steel. You'll pass it down to your kids when you croak.

 

[the_bird]

Yeah, it's also like $1,700. I haven't figured out a budget for a smoker yet, but it ain't seventeen hundred.

 

[Cape Brewing]

By far the biggest reason I have my electric is that I use to smoke bacon for close to 24 hours. I'm not feeding effin charcoal for 24 hours.

 

[paulthenurse]

Yeah, it's also like $1,700. I haven't figured out a budget for a smoker yet, but it ain't seventeen hundred.

Go big or go home.

What's more important, paying for the Spawns college or the ability to make fantastic BBQ as they grow up? If they want to go to college that much they can get a Job selling BBQ sandwiches and pay their own damn tuition.

Cape is right about the electrics for real low and real slow. Cant beat them.

 

[Melana]

Go big or go home.

What's more important, paying for the Spawns college or the ability to make fantastic BBQ as they grow up? If they want to go to college that much they can get a Job selling BBQ sandwiches and pay their own damn tuition.

Cape is right about the electrics for real low and real slow. Cant beat them.

But, isn't that close to cheating?

 

[paulthenurse]

I bet that wont seem like such a bad thing when the first racks of ribs land on the table.

 

[Melana]

I bet that wont seem like such a bad thing when the first racks of ribs land on the table.

Beef or pork?

 

[paulthenurse]

Hehehehe... She said pork!

 

[DakotaRules]

Hehehehe... She said pork!

She could have just been pointing at you!

 

[paulthenurse]

I figured that was a given.

Hey Mike, did you sign up for the ride yet?