The Dysfunctional-Palooza Obnoxious Masshole BS Thread

[balrog]

After the rather blustery night, is everyone's tin roof still in the correct time zone, regardless of whether Congress passes a forever daylight savings time law next year?

 

[day_trippr]

Surprisingly little evidence of mayhem here in spite of the drama last night...

 

[Hoppy2bmerry]

Surprisingly little evidence of mayhem here in spite of the drama last night...

By drama, do you mean weather persons on your local news clearly having orgasmic experiences while uttering the words ”high wind gusts“ and ”secure your things that aren’t nailed down” also “watch out for falling branches”?

 

[smurfjuicebrew]

Yup ...

 

[balrog]

By drama, do you mean weather persons on your local news clearly having orgasmic experiences while uttering the words ”high wind gusts“ and ”secure your things that aren’t nailed down” also “watch out for falling branches”?

Wilbraham had some 55mph gusts.
But even that wouldn't take down any of the 5 black walnut trees that annually poot out 40 wheelbarrow loads of back breaking mess.

The wind did redistribute my wheelbarrow down the side yard a bit though.

 

[Hoppy2bmerry]

Wilbraham had some 55mph gusts.
But even that wouldn't take down any of the 5 black walnut trees that annually poot out 40 wheelbarrow loads of back breaking mess.

The wind did redistribute my wheelbarrow down the side yard a bit though.

I’m glad all is good. I have Adirondack-ish rocking chairs on my front deck… I haven’t flipped them over yet, but that is enough to keep them from moving into the wall even in a blizzard.

 

[smurfjuicebrew]

Balrog, how big be these walnuts? could be worth money.

 

[balrog]

Balrog, how big be these walnuts? could be worth money.

For 28 years I've heard folks say that. Funny thing is, I never hear nary a word after saying, "make me an offer". Also, There's likely no straight, limb free section on any of them longer than about 3 feet. I did take a section of a large limb once, chain/bandsawed out some heartwood, and was able to make a couple of pens on the lathe. Worth it only to be able to say it was from wood from the yard. As for the fruit, if that's what yer askin, they are hella not worth dehusking and drying and cracking. Nasty walnutses.
Some are big, some are small, and some look like a lemon shape

But they all gets thrown unceremoniously in the giant pile in the back that never dies.

 

[day_trippr]

Damn! One of those "oranges" drop on your haid and you're gonna have a bad time

 

[Hoppy2bmerry]

Those green hulls are used for a medicinal tincture. Pretty pricey too.

 

[smurfjuicebrew]

wal, iffin them trunks aint straight, not worth much to a sawmill

 

[homebeerbrewer]

Home Depot would love to make their lumber with that...

 

[balrog]

Damn! One of those "oranges" drop on your haid and you're gonna have a bad time

When they start coming down, I try to go out every. Single. Day. and pick up a bucket, maybe two. If you leave them on the lawn more than a couple days, the hulls go black and sticky. If I wait to just "do it all" on the weekend, I'll be in traction because it'll take hours to pick up the yard, and the trees will still drop more. I have come very, very close to getting beaned. Windy days are a distinct no no for gathering.

And nothing wakes you in the middle of the night like a one pound coconut walnut dropping 50 feet onto your metal basement hatchway doors, or the poor, severely dimpled now, Weber grill, or the roof.

 

[paulthenurse]

Went looking for corrugated metal roofing for the barn recently, found some at Lowe's. Get to the checkout and the cashier tells me I can save $75 if I open an account.
Ok.
So I get the bill and tried to pay it this morning. Can't use my debit card, they wanted a bank routing number and a checking account. Seriously? I don't have any idea where my checkbook is and don't remember the last time I wrote out a check.
"Sorry sir, that's how we do it"

So I find the long forgotten checkbook and mailed in a check.

(Don't even get me going about stamps and GD envelopes)

I had my petty revenge.

I wrote the check out in Palmer Script.

 

[day_trippr]

If this rain keeps pounding I'm gonna need a bigger boat!

 

[balrog]

I just thank all manner of known deities, random faerie royalty, the odd goat and 9 ladies dancing, that all the rain was not snow.

 

[day_trippr]

Our pond was a foot from being totally dry going into this fall, and even two days ago was a good couple of feet from reaching the overflow. When I woke up this morning and looked there was still 6" to go. An hour later and the outflow is half submerged and there's a pretty good stream running into it. I have no idea what that means to a rain gauge but we had to have gotten a crapton of rain overnight.

Otherwise, there are branches and limbs scattered all over but miraculously the power never went out!

 

[Hoppy2bmerry]

My back yard… coastal flooding is real and yes it is part of the price I pay for a water view. Happy Holidays everyone.

 

[balrog]

State of emergency in upstate NY today. Means the outlaws inlaws aren't coming until tomorrow instead of today.

Yes, yes, tragic.


My poor unused kegs have only me to tend them and bring comfort & joy.

Stupid root beer still not carbed enough, that's why it's hooked up. I know you were all going to ask.

 

[day_trippr]

Ok, another squall roared through and turned a couple of thick hardwood trees into busted leaners that are now threatening my driveway. Arrgh!
Called my friend Vivian at New England Tree Masters and she's sending her husband over to check it out. Might be able to have them taken down and chipped up tomorrow with any luck.

Meanwhile I dropped the boat & trailer off its blocks and dragged it and then my utility trailer out of harms way. There's a really good chance one of those leaners is going to be a faller...

 

[Hoppy2bmerry]

Stay safe Trip. Low tide is in just about an hour and the road pretty much still looks like this. I was hoping to move the cars out of the driveway before the next high. I’m not sure I’ll be able to.

 

[day_trippr]

Man, that looks like major suckage right there. Similar scene deep inside Boston Harbor.
I guess there's a king tide coincident with the storm surge? Bad combo.

 

[day_trippr]

Aaaand there goes the electric service.
And the power company outage map is unreachable. Nice.

Thank goodness it's actually balmy here right now...

 

[Hoppy2bmerry]

Aaaand there goes the electric service.
And the power company outage map is unreachable. Nice.

Thank goodness it's actually balmy here right now...

Crap! Get the fire going now it won’t be balmy for long.

 

[day_trippr]

Major bullet dodged. The outage was a downed Big Fat Wire from National Grid that runs into our local muni power system, taking three entire towns completely off the air. Had to drive two towns over to find an open restaurant - which was mobbed by like minded refugees. Sitting in the truck waiting for our order and got a blast call from our local gendarmes saying it could take 10 to 12 hours to fix and it would be revisited in the morning!?! WTH?

But...somehow the power came back on 15 minutes ago. And it is starting to get cold out there...

 

[TheDudeLebowski]

Smells like Xmas over here. Plenty of white pines down but the one rotten one hanging over our street is still going strong

 

[paulthenurse]

When its 2:30 am and you're wide awake because the flu has had you in bed for the past 2 days...
This sux

Happy Magic Baby Day Eve.

Written at 2:30. Then forgotten about while I coughed out my spleen. The thoughts stand.
MXM

 

[day_trippr]

Jeeze, Paulie, sorry you're sick. Pound down the chicken soup!

 

[TheDudeLebowski]

Shine is better!

 

[Hoppy2bmerry]

Happy, Merry, Holidays to you all!

This is my tree this year and it’s really easy to find the pickle. Cheers!

 

[day_trippr]

lol! Ok?

Merry Christmas to Massholes and wannabees everywhere!

 

[paulthenurse]

Heeeheeeheeee. She just said it's easy to find the pickle.

 

[Hoppy2bmerry]

Heeeheeeheeee. She just said it's easy to find the pickle.

Isn’t that what every man wants to hear?
I hope you’re feeling better.

 

[paulthenurse]

Not 100% but I didn't die.

Felt touch and go there for a while.

 

[balrog]

Time ti switch to the decaf NyQuil Paulie.

But I am glad you are feeling better. I wouldn’t know where to send the Sox without ya.

 

[homebeerbrewer]

Paul, we don't really want to know that you were touching yourself while you were sick.

 

[Hoppy2bmerry]

Hung over?

 

[balrog]

Not here.

 

[Hoppy2bmerry]

Not here.

Soooo, happy new year!

 

[balrog]

Soooo, happy new year!

Indeed. To you as well. Other than the rain, it was a lovely evening trying to play raised platform tennis, which quickly devolved into combining my Altbier w as many of the foodstuffs brought. I think I gained 10 pounds. I think I should’ve able to lose that in 2 days before my yearly physical. Maybe.