I expect LSU's first covert mission will be the night of Masstoberfest.
"Gee no, Mrs Cape. I haven't seen him since he left to drive that lonely bisexual psychology grad student back to her dorm... Her name? Uhhhh. ****. Or Boon. Or Noob Something like that anyways... I can't say for sure, probably five or six hours ago.
(No dammit, AROUND the feet and up between the knees.)
Ya, I know... That's wiered. But you know what a joker he is... Remember that time...
(God dammit bird, do I have to do every farkin thing myself? Use the shackle to attach the anchor to the chain..,)
Remember that time at the Zu brew when he called you and told you he was on his way home, the butt dialed you and you got to listen to him for the next two hours tell us all how he'd outsmarted you? That Cape... What a joker!
(Ok. 450 feet beneath the keel. Say hello to Captain Ahab muttafarker.)
No. I'm sure hell be home shortly. Don't you worry about it one bit. Btw, you've been keeping up with his insurance policy, right? Ha ha ha!