Kids in Wal-Mart! Ahhhhh!

[r3dn3ckstyl3z]

Ok, I have to rant for second or 5. Here's the deal. I was in the wally world about an hour ago. I had my son with me (he'll be 4 in august).

There was a woman with her kid there. He's was probably about 5 or 6. He was going nuts. Getting into everything, not listening to his mom, blah blah, you guys know the spill. Well, it was quite irratating, to say the least.

I had the last straw when i stepped away for a second to grab some ribeyes to throw on the grill later. I could still see my cart about 10-15 ft away.
Then i hear my son yell, "No you stay out of our stuff. This is my daddy's stuff." I turn to see this kid that has been irrating me grabbin stuff out of my cart and just tossing it on the floor. His mom however was just doing the whole, "No, No. Don't do that. That's not nice." Now i'm not sure but i believe i would have been beating my son at that point in front of God and everyone. And i made that point very clear to the mom. She didn't like that and responded that "She doesn't believe in spanking children. That is abuse." I said spank not beat the hell out of. I simply replied, "Well, that's why your kid will be asking my kid if he has any spare change in about 20 years or so." Karma is a b!t(h.

I've seen this as a growing trend over the last few years where parents either don't know how or are scared to discipline their kids or just don't give a d@mn all together. I'll be the first to say that my kids have a healthy respect for the spankin. They know that when they step out of line they get popped and the punishment is equal to the offense. Hell, i grew up with a healthy respect for the belt and looking back at it. I don't blame my parents for a single thing. It makes me respect them more b/c they were willing to put there time and energy into me to make sure that i did my best. Even if it hurt sometimes, lol.

I know i can't be the only one who believes in this.

 

[Evan!]

No, you're not the only one. Our pussified culture has somehow conflated spanking with child abuse.

I do find it amusing where you say in one sentence "I would be beating my son at that point", then in the next sentence, you say "I said spank, not beat". Uh, yeah, you said "beat".

Anyway, yeah, I believe in a good spankin'. I think I'd draw the line at public whippins though. Take them out to the car and spank 'em! I don't know, as much as I loathe terrible parents who coddle their demon spawn as they wreak havoc in public, I really don't like seeing parents spanking their kids in the middle of wally-world.

 

[the bunnay]

If you can't control your children within reason then you shouldn't be taking them out in public. I don't care much what school of disciple you ascribe to as long as it works.

 

[kjung]

No, you're not the only one. Our pussified culture has somehow conflated spanking with child abuse.

I do find it amusing where you say in one sentence "I would be beating my son at that point", then in the next sentence, you say "I said spank, not beat". Uh, yeah, you said "beat".

Anyway, yeah, I believe in a good spankin'. I think I'd draw the line at public whippins though. Take them out to the car and spank 'em! I don't know, as much as I loathe terrible parents who coddle their demon spawn as they wreak havoc in public, I really don't like seeing parents spanking their kids in the middle of wally-world.

I've got to agree with you, however, when my kids were little and they acted up in public (usually in grocery stores or restaurants), I had no problem giving them A swat on the backside if/when they desrved it, then continue the punishment later.

 

[r3dn3ckstyl3z]

No, you're not the only one. Our pussified culture has somehow conflated spanking with child abuse.

I do find it amusing where you say in one sentence "I would be beating my son at that point", then in the next sentence, you say "I said spank, not beat". Uh, yeah, you said "beat".

Anyway, yeah, I believe in a good spankin'. I think I'd draw the line at public whippins though. Take them out to the car and spank 'em! I don't know, as much as I loathe terrible parents who coddle their demon spawn as they wreak havoc in public, I really don't like seeing parents spanking their kids in the middle of wally-world.

I can understand the taking them to the car and such. However, i want it to be fresh in there mind as to why they are getting spanked.
I did say beat didn't i, lol. Oh well, chock it up to fruedian slip.

 

[Evan!]

I've got to agree with you, however, when my kids were little and they acted up in public (usually in grocery stores or restaurants), I had no problem giving them A swat on the backside if/when they desrved it, then continue the punishment later.

A little swat on the ass is one thing. A formal spanking session is another.

 

[Bedlam]

The bottom line is that her method of discipline wasn't working. I work with problem children for a living and you'd be amazed at how FEW problems I have with the "problem" children, by being consistent and firm and CLEAR on expectations. There is a a way to convey that you mean business without threatening physical violence. Obviously, this woman doesn't get it. Naturally, I'm not allowed to spank the kids I work with, but I really don't need it. We work on a token economy system and they work their little butts off for privileges, then they are proud of what they have EARNED and it means a lot to them.

Consistency is key.

Personally, I'm not against spanking, but only in very rare instance and NEVER when you are angry. I get just as annoyed by the lazy parent who's always smacking the kid for the least infraction or ignores the behavior until the PARENT gets annoyed enough to give the kid a whack. Talk about mixed messages! What's a kid supposed to take away from that lesson? That you can do what you want until you bother someone bigger than you? Inappropriate.

Spanking is a tool, and to be used rarely. But spanking the kid in the OP's post wouldn't really accomplish much. It needs to be part of the system that involves consistency and clarity.

 

[r3dn3ckstyl3z]

A little swat on the ass is one thing. A formal spanking session is another.

I guess that was what i was trying to get at....

 

[hayabusa]

I simply replied, "Well, that's why your kid will be asking my kid if he has any spare change in about 20 years or so."

excellence....

that is all.

 

[EdWort]

If you can't control your children within reason then you shouldn't be taking them out in public. I don't care much what school of disciple you ascribe to as long as it works.

+1 I agree 100%. Spanking works best when done early in life, then only a stern look is required and if needed, counting to three with sign language. This works very well in my experience.

Sometime they will push you to three to see if they will get a swat on the behind. The key is to swat on two sometimes to keep them guessing.

 

[r3dn3ckstyl3z]

Consistency is key.

Personally, I'm not against spanking, but only in very rare instance and NEVER when you are angry. I get just as annoyed by the lazy parent who's always smacking the kid for the least infraction or ignores the behavior until the PARENT gets annoyed enough to give the kid a whack. Talk about mixed messages! What's a kid supposed to take away from that lesson? That you can do what you want until you bother someone bigger than you?

.

Consistency is the word of the day..... I agree with that 100%..... In all fairness, i would never just haul off and beat my kids b/c i was angry or that was the easiest thing to do. They do understand limitations, though. They know that the offense will warrant the consequence. They know that they have one chance to do right. I would rather me be a bit strict on them now than have to worry about society dealing with them when they get out from under my wing. I guess that my school of thought.

 

[r3dn3ckstyl3z]

+1 I agree 100%. Spanking works best when done early in life, then only a stern look is required and if needed, counting to three with sign language. This works very well in my experience.

Sometime they will push you to three to see if they will get a swat on the behind. The key is to swat on two sometimes to keep them guessing.

Ed I have never failed to get a chuckle out of anything that you post. However true it is.

 

[Bernie Brewer]

 

[r3dn3ckstyl3z]

Bernie that is classic... I'm gonna print a dozen or so and hand them out at the door.

 

[Cheeto]

With my children 3yrs-5yrs were the most important I feel for teaching them to respect and follow the instructions of SWMBO and I.

I have a close friend that has 2 children that are close the same age as my older two they were not taught respect and were IMHO spoiled now they are 6- 10 and they get spanked often and in public.

I cannot agree more with EdWort on this one.

If you kids don't respect you our your words you are in line for a rough time when they are in the mid to late teens !!!


-Jason

 

[ChickenSoop]

I've seen parents with OCD/ADD kids and it is a disaster, discipline is pointless. It's in the DNA.


The nightmare begins at 3-5 years.

 

[Ceedubya]

I don't spank my kids....




..... anymore

I don't really have to, all it takes now is a hard look cuz they know that I am capable of giving them a spanking.

I agree that starting now would probably be a waste, that kid should already have known what consequences are.

 

[Yuri_Rage]

What's wrong with buying beer and diapers?

 

[Beerrific]

What's wrong with buying beer and diapers?

Beer and adult diapers? Sounds like a fun night.

 

[Bernie Brewer]

I have nothing against spanking kids when they need it; I never had any reservations about swatting my boys on the behind when they wouldn't listen to anything else. I didn't care where we were or who was there. I even dragged my oldest into the church bathroom and swatted him when he misbehaved in church. BUT.........

For my kids, when they were in a store together, ANY store, no amount of spanking ever helped. They were absolutely imfeckingpossible in a store. One kid alone was fine, but together, they had us ready to shoot them. You could promise them McDonald's if they were good,you could try to get them to help shop, you could start on the three strikes thing, you could spank them silly. It didn't matter. In a store they were just like that kid the OP in this thread. I'd be at my wits' end, and the oldest would look at me and say "well we have to do SOMETHING to amuse ourselves." It got to the point where we had to divide and conquer- one parent went to one store with one kid, and the other parent went to another store with the other kid. They really are lucky to be still alive.

 

[jblaven]

...i hear my son yell, "No you stay out of our stuff. This is my daddy's stuff."

The best part!

 

[jmendez29]

I have nothing against spanking kids when they need it; I never had any reservations about swatting my boys on the behind when they wouldn't listen to anything else. I didn't care where we were or who was there. I even dragged my oldest into the church bathroom and swatted him when he misbehaved in church. BUT.........

For my kids, when they were in a store together, ANY store, no amount of spanking ever helped. They were absolutely imfeckingpossible in a store. One kid alone was fine, but together, they had us ready to shoot them. You could promise them McDonald's if they were good,you could try to get them to help shop, you could start on the three strikes thing, you could spank them silly. It didn't matter. In a store they were just like that kid the OP in this thread. I'd be at my wits' end, and the oldest would look at me and say "well we have to do SOMETHING to amuse ourselves." It got to the point where we had to divide and conquer- one parent went to one store with one kid, and the other parent went to another store with the other kid. They really are lucky to be still alive.

Sounds like my two.

After a momentary loss of self control when my son was still in diapers, I made a conscious decision to distribute spankings only for particular offenses. Those being when they have hurt or are about to hurt themselves or someone else, and blatant disrespect. The injury thing being something like trying to stick a knife into an outlet, or spraying bleach cleaner into his sister's mouth. (Yeah, it really happened.) Otherwise, there are plenty of other punishments that a creative person could come up with.

For Example:
A stern talking to while having to hold a belt - implying a spanking of the worst kind.
Misbehavior due to excessive energy? Go chop down that tree, and then chop it up when you're done.
Hold a pencil with your two index fingers at arms length for 5 minutes.
Etc, Etc.

These are some of the more creative punishments I've heard of, but used for some of the more extreme cases of misbehavior. I've used the belt one before, but I don't have trees, and I hated the pencil thing when it was done to me.

 

[Parker36]

They really need a Whole Foods version of this. I'd bet a lot of them could be similar (see no shoes, body odor, etc). Knock those hippies down a peg or two.

 

[the bunnay]

They really need a Whole Foods version of this. I'd bet a lot of them could be similar (see no shoes, body odor, etc). Knock those hippies down a peg or two.

In these parts Whole Foods Bingo would pretty much be Hipster Bingo:

 

[thataintchicken]

could double as a Chuck E Cheese Bingo Card.

 

[bubbachunk]

+1 I agree 100%. Spanking works best when done early in life, then only a stern look is required and if needed, counting to three with sign language. This works very well in my experience.

Sometime they will push you to three to see if they will get a swat on the behind. The key is to swat on two sometimes to keep them guessing.

Lol loved that part.

+1 to everything else you said!

 

[brewthunda]

If you can't control your children within reason then you shouldn't be taking them out in public. I don't care much what school of disciple you ascribe to as long as it works.

The one thing I've learned as a parent is that you can never presume that kids are normal. That misbehaving kid may be mentally disabled and his freaking out a bit and throwing a few things on the floor may be what the mom has to put up with if she wants to buy groceries. Do you want to live in a society where we force parents of disabled kids to stay home 24/7 and lock their kids away?

Personally speaking, I'm willing to put up with seeing kids wig out a little bit and am willing to have some compassion with parents in hard situations.

My almost-3 yr old son was impossible to control for about the last 18 months. Disipline, yelling, punishment, bribing . . nothing worked. we would have to use one of those leashes when near big crowds or water. If we put on music, he'd freak out and run and shut off the stereo. Multiple doctors couldn't find anything wrong. Finally after it became clear that his speech was badly delayed we figured out that he couldn't hear. What 5 different doctors missed was that he was about 90% deaf and was in perpetual pain from the pressure of fluid built up in his ears. They figured that this has been going on for about 18 months. Last month he had ear tube put in, which instantly relieved the pressure and restored his hearing to 100%. 2 days later he was following instructions, sitting for hours working on puzzles, turning on music, etc. Night and day difference. And I seriously want to go out and slap silly every single ******* person who made disparaging comments about our parenting abilities (including the doctors who couldn't find anything wrong), when it was a medical issue, not behavioral.

 

[the bunnay]

The one thing I've learned as a parent is that you can never presume that kids are normal. That misbehaving kid may be mentally disabled and his freaking out a bit and throwing a few things on the floor may be what the mom has to put up with if she wants to buy groceries. Do you want to live in a society where we force parents of disabled kids to stay home 24/7 and lock their kids away?

Personally speaking, I'm willing to put up with seeing kids wig out a little bit and am willing to have some compassion with parents in hard situations.

My almost-3 yr old son was impossible to control for about the last 18 months. Disipline, yelling, punishment, bribing . . nothing worked. we would have to use one of those leashes when near big crowds or water. If we put on music, he'd freak out and run and shut off the stereo. Multiple doctors couldn't find anything wrong. Finally after it became clear that his speech was badly delayed we figured out that he couldn't hear. What 5 different doctors missed was that he was about 90% deaf and was in perpetual pain from the pressure of fluid built up in his ears. They figured that this has been going on for about 18 months. Last month he had ear tube put in, which instantly relieved the pressure and restored his hearing to 100%. 2 days later he was following instructions, sitting for hours working on puzzles, turning on music, etc. Night and day difference. And I seriously want to go out and slap silly every single ******* person who made disparaging comments about our parenting abilities (including the doctors who couldn't find anything wrong), when it was a medical issue, not behavioral.

Hence my "within reason" caveat. Even if it is a medical issue, the child shouldn't be allowed to take things out of other people's carts, run wild or touch and engage people without intervention. And yes, while I do have a lot of compassion for someone who has a child with a disability, If you can't keep that child out of other people's personal space then you should make other arrangements as it creates a dangerous safety hazard for your child and other people if they are running underfoot unsupervised. I completely understand that children will yell or cry and clearly you will never get away from that. I think that what the OP was pointing out was the complete lack of the parent in trying to control the child or apologize when he was acting out of order. It certainly isn't a zero-tolerance position, but it goes both ways.

 

[malkore]

You mean scold our precious little snowflake? But, he might feel bad!

 

[APendejo]

Many years ago I witnessed a little boy about 5-6 running around the store, completely out of control. He would stop long enough to take pulls off his moms Coke the take off again.
He disappeared for a minute or two and came flying down the aisle with his arms spread making airplane noise. Then just before he got to my cart, he reachend into the row of mayonaise jars and made a screeching noise. 10-15 jars of mayo hit the deck and quite a few broke.
The little kid just stood there kind of tweeking. His mom came running up, stood there and said to me " I just don't know what to do, he's been like this all day"
I just looked at her and said "you need to keep him off the sugar, give him a good ass whippin', then go smack yourself in the face".
I really hope she took me up on the advice.
AP