I want to brew beer. A keg at a time. What do I need?

[shulace]

Froggity.

BIG AND SIMPLE!

Can someone give me a recipe for 45 gallons? For some amber ale? or a recipe per gallon?

 

[shulace]

This is not a joke.

I WILL DRINK 5 GALLONS OF BEER IN A NIGHT! NO POINT!

Are you guys just brewing for yourselves in your moms basement or something? WTF!

 

[ChefRex]

This is not a joke.

I WILL DRINK 5 GALLONS OF BEER IN A NIGHT! NO POINT!

Are you guys just brewing for yourselves in your moms basement or something? WTF!

Remmy?

 

[1977Brewer]

This is truly awesome. Please keep us updated.

 

[Gavin C]

This is not a joke.

I WILL DRINK 5 GALLONS OF BEER IN A NIGHT! NO POINT!

Are you guys just brewing for yourselves in your moms basement or something? WTF!

Good for you sir/ma'am

I trust this practice is conducive to optimal animal husbandry/crop management the following day on your farm. I commend you for your ambition. Your project has such potential. Alas I fear you may fall short of your objective of copious volumes of fermented liquid in a week to be consumed outside of a relative's basement.

It would appear through no fault of your own that you have not been endowed with a level of intellect approaching society's norms nor one compatible with day to day functions. I make this assertion solely on the body of written evidence in this thread and am truly sorry for your bad luck in this regard.

I look forward with eager anticipation to seeing the fruits of your sisyphean labors.

As a side note why do feel the need to place the word kettle in parentheses.

 

[passedpawn]

Good for you sir/ma'am

I trust this practice is conducive to optimal animal husbandry/crop management the following day on your farm. I commend you for your ambition. Your project has such potential. Alas I fear you may fall short of your objective of copious volumes of fermented liquid in a week to be consumed outside of a relative's basement.

It would appear through no fault of your own that you have not been endowed with a level of intellect approaching society's norms nor one compatible with day to day functions. I make this assertion solely on the body of written evidence in this thread and am truly sorry for your bad luck in this regard.

I look forward with eager anticipation to seeing the fruits of your sisyphean labors.

As a side note why do feel the need to place the word kettle in parentheses.

sisyphean! Word!

 

[passedpawn]

To the OP, I'm sorry to close this thread. I'm sure you started it with the best of intentions, but it took a wrong turn and seems to have already headed over a cliff. I hope I don't offend when I say that your endeavor was probably a bit too ambitious for your experience. Brewing is an activity consisting of many small parts: perhaps address each part as a separate thread?

I must close this thread because it's not what we like to see in the beginner's forum (no fault of yours, OP).

To the rest of you fools, please try to keep your antics and sarcasm out of the beginner's forum. Thanks.