Historical Scholars have confirmed....

[bob1852]

Adam and Eve were kicked out of the Garden of Eden for making Apfelwein rather than BMC.

Cain killed Abel because he wouldn't drink BMC.

God flooded the earth because Noah was the only one drinking BMC.

BMC had Jesus crucified because he preached that all beers were equal.

At the Council of Nicea, the Apocrypha was left out of the bible because BMC thought they'd take market share away from the Old and New Testaments.

Christopher Columbus was paid by BMC to "discover" America so they could take over the market share from those selfish Indians drinking their moonshine swill.

Archduke Ferdinand was assasinated by BMC because he drank a Midas Touch, not a BMC.

We had to defeat Hitler, because his Third Reich included forcing the whole world to drink doppelboch instead of BMC.

We went to fight North Korea because they drank saki instead of BMC.

Ditto for Vietnam.

Saddam didn't have WMD's - he had craft brews and that pissed off BMC enough for us to invade Iraq.

It's all true - I read a blog and a tweet about it.

 

[dataz722]

Makes perfect sense to me.

 

[scubapoet]

It's all true - I read a blog and a tweet about it.

... you read?

<ducks>

 

[GodsStepBrother]

amzing stuff...

Jesus, also buried the dinosaurs because they could not open a can of BMC. They lacked the opposable thumb.

 

[Whut]

... you read?

<ducks>

Nah, he's just drunk!

 

[Revvy]

BMC caused my heart valve to disintegrate dontjaknow.

 

[Airborneguy]

Scholars have confirmed that not only did Ben Franklin NOT say the famous "Beer is proof" quote, but that Ben Franklin was in fact deaf, dumb, mute and blind, and everything attributed to him actually came from the evil 18th Century German brewing families known as Busch, Miller, and Coors, now commonly known as BMC. Ben Franklin is also commonly considered the founder of the "Three Tier Tea Trading System" which required Indian porters to carry all tea - on foot - from India to the New World. This greatly increased costs and led to the Boston Tea Party, and is now perpetuated in alcohol sales through a FEDERALLY MANDATED system requiring middle-men to sell all alcohol.

 

[Revvy]

Oh know our deepest fears are confirmed!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Megabrewers Merge and Purchase All U.S. Craft Brewers

People are being influenced by the onion so much that they start writing like them.

 

[Revvy]

BMC drinking causes rampant lesbianism among college girls...

But is that necessarily a bad thing?