HIDEOUS brewing confessions..........

[cheezydemon3]

After a bizarre child support mis-hap and a few bad months at work.......

I HAVE 15 GALLONS OF PRISON HOOCH FERMENTING.........


Gawd help me.......

 

[b-boy]

Is it in your toilet? I believe that's where you're supposed to ferment it. I could be wrong though. I got that information from watching women in prison movies starring Linda Blair. I think there's about 100 of them.

Be careful. Don't get shanked out in your yard while you're mowing the grass.

Remember, cigarettes can get you out of almost any jam.

Walk up to the toughest guy in your neighborhood and punch him. You have to send a message so no no one will F with you.

You'll need to pick a gang too. I'd go with the Aryans because they're nuts, but you might end up having to get some distasteful tatoos.

But hey - whatever keeps you alive while you're in the big house - right?

 

[Zuljin]

I've gone down the fruit juice aisle buying everything I thought would taste good mixed together and fermented, and then brewed it.

 

[brettwasbtd]

I've gone down the fruit juice aisle buying everything I thought would taste good mixed together and fermented, and then brewed it.

And... How did it taste?

 

[2drunk2]

Age it until the new season of orange is the new black.

 

[Zuljin]

And... How did it taste?

Fruity.

 

[MindenMan]

I LOVE Orange is the New Black. I do wonder, if any of those beverages have HFCS, and how did they ferment, like usual?

 

[2drunk2]

I'm sure they ferment too hot, and without an airlock....

 

[cheezydemon3]

Yeah, they act like the hooch (OITNB) is 40 proof.

There is no way the stuff is over 20 proof with bread yeast.

 

[TyTanium]

Here's my confession:

I haven't brewed since JANUARY. And haven't logged in here in about the same. For shame.

...but...yeast is on the plate brewery is back in business.

 

[judsonp]

I LOVE Orange is the New Black. I do wonder, if any of those beverages have HFCS, and how did they ferment, like usual?

Why wouldn't HFCS ferment normally? Both fructose and glucose ferment like the simple sugars they are, no?

 

[roastquake]

So Cheezy, what's your recipe?

I've been known to make hooch myself, after my first batch of legit beer, I was intrigued by watching the fermentation play out. So I fermented a 20 oz. bottle of some fake fruit "juice" in it's own bottle with bread yeast. It made alcohol

 

[cheezydemon3]

12 cups table sugar and 1 gallon of applejuice in 4 gallons of water.

Boil the sugar in 1 gallon of water (add gradually so as not to scorch any)

Add to 3 gallons water and 1 gallon pure applejuice.

I used lager yeast fermented 68F or so.



The first batch was so effing fast and easy, I did 2 more batches before they could wrestle me to the ground and pry the 25lb bag of sugar from my fingers..........gawd help me.......

 

[roastquake]

That doesn't sound so bad, I was thinking it would involve something terrible like Faygo, or orange juice.

 

[cheezydemon3]

Real "Prison Hooch" calls for bread and potatos and ****. I seriously thought I might ferment this and then "eis" distill it.

(ala eisbock method of freezing to concentrate)

 

[Hello]

Why wouldn't HFCS ferment normally? Both fructose and glucose ferment like the simple sugars they are, no?

Pretty sure. I don't know why HFCS wouldn't ferment like any other simple sugar.


I think the only "confession" would be that I too went down the juice isle and thought about all the booze I could make with little effort. If I had known this 20 years ago, I would have been a hot mess! :rockin:

 

[cernst151]

Oof! Why all the water and sugar? Just straight apple cider is cheap and ferments to a pretty good ABV. What you're making sounds pretty awful.

 

[cheezydemon3]

Agreed, but it costs roughly what 5 gallons of beer does.

This is nonsensical to debate. I felt like doing it, so I did. Honestly, I think 5 packets of koolaid and 2 more cups of sugar will go into each one, but I will let you know.

 

[Fuzzymittenbrewing]

Agreed, but it costs roughly what 5 gallons of beer does.

This is nonsensical to debate. I felt like doing it, so I did. Honestly, I think 5 packets of koolaid and 2 more cups of sugar will go into each one, but I will let you know.

I usually get away with a $10-$12 or so tab making 5 gallons of 11.5% Skeeter. I may try yours just to give it a whirl. And I am very pro-Kool Aid use on mine I love making great beer but I've always had a soft spot for good old hooch

 

[cheezydemon3]

AMAZINGLY good...........

WOW. Not kidding.

Like fairly dry hard cider. I am gonna keg it.....still not kidding.....

 

[Brewmex41]

Ok, so mine isnt so bad, but I just brewed a beer (SNPA-ish clone) for next weekend. I have 7 days to ferment, keg and carbonate. Prolly should have said, no there isn't enough time. But, I am getting another corny keg out of the deal, so it's worth it.

 

[Fuzzymittenbrewing]

12 cups table sugar and 1 gallon of applejuice in 4 gallons of water.

Boil the sugar in 1 gallon of water (add gradually so as not to scorch any)

Add to 3 gallons water and 1 gallon pure applejuice.

I used lager yeast fermented 68F or so.



The first batch was so effing fast and easy, I did 2 more batches before they could wrestle me to the ground and pry the 25lb bag of sugar from my fingers..........gawd help me.......

You think it would be better with 2 gallons juice and the rest water?

 

[cheezydemon3]

Possibly. I think with NOTHING but water and sugar, the 1 gallon carries through a lot of flavor.

 

[Fuzzymittenbrewing]

Edit: nevermind

 

[hunter_le five]

Edit: nevermind

Yes, that was a good album. But the man died 20 years ago, let it go already.

 

[cheezydemon3]

OH man!!!!

hunter La5 just named my red kool aid hooch!!!!.......the Kurt Cobain Bloody Shotgun............ahhhhhhhh....nevermind.

 

[rekoob]

that name is too funny.
oh, and I might have to try this.

 

[WayFrae]

Is it in your toilet? I believe that's where you're supposed to ferment it.

Hahaha now I really want to see what a 15 gallon toilet bowl looks like!

 

[cheezydemon3]

I really wonder about the ABV.

The Kurt flavored HOOCH tastes like straight up Cherry Kool Aid with a slightly yeasty aroma. No alcohol at all. 5 pints and I think I felt a mild buzz.....

12 cups table sugar

1 gallon of applejuice

3 gallons of water.

lager yeast fermented 68F or so.

KEGGED WITH:

4 packs cherry Koolaid
1 pack fruit punch Koolaid

4 cups sugar

 

[WayFrae]

Wow! I would think you should be somewhere around 6 or 7% abv. That is very strange there isn't much alcohol.

 

[cheezydemon3]

Not saying that there isn't, just that I don't taste it, and it didn't hit me like 7%.....but it could have been deceptive.

 

[WayFrae]

Yeah but I would think 5 pints at 7% would provide more than a mild buzz.

 

[Fuzzymittenbrewing]

12 cups table sugar and 1 gallon of applejuice in 4 gallons of water.

Boil the sugar in 1 gallon of water (add gradually so as not to scorch any)

Add to 3 gallons water and 1 gallon pure applejuice.

I used lager yeast fermented 68F or so.



The first batch was so effing fast and easy, I did 2 more batches before they could wrestle me to the ground and pry the 25lb bag of sugar from my fingers..........gawd help me.......

Just whipped up 5 gallons of this but used 2 gallons of juice and 15 cups sugar. OG was 1.080

 

[hunter_le five]

Don't forget to add a bottle of Everclear in the secondary.

 

[Fuzzymittenbrewing]

This is probably dangerous enough lol

 

[giraffe]

I fermented 3 gallons of 1.070 tang before. It was, sadly, surprisingly drinkable.

 

[cheezydemon3]

I hate to say it, but for a chick beverage, or the occasional cheap pint, the plain stuff is almost like decent champagne.....if champagne were a 6% quaffable beverage.

 

[WayFrae]

I fermented 3 gallons of 1.070 tang before. It was, sadly, surprisingly drinkable.

Oooh I love tang.

 

[Fuzzymittenbrewing]

Oooh I love tang.

And that was the first thought that crossed my "I'll ferment anything once" mind.

 

[Black Island Brewer]

I had a client with schizophrenia who made hooch with sugar, grated potato (for body) and cherry kool aid, and said when he drank it, it would just make him mad. The latex gloves he used as an airlock on his carboy had a hole poked in the middle finger, so it would fill, flip you off, then collapse. He was crazy, using a glass carboy.