Golf and My Physical

[snccoulter]

During my physical, my doctor asked me about my daily activity level,
and so I described a typical day this way:

"Well, yesterday afternoon, I waded along the edge of a lake, drank eight beers, escaped from wild dogs in the heavy brush, marched up and down several rocky hills, stood in a patch of poison ivy, crawled out of quicksand. and jumped away from an aggressive rattlesnake"
Inspired by the story, the doctor said, "You must be one hell of an outdoors man!"

"No," I replied, "I'm just a lousy golfer."

 

[passedpawn]

Haha

 

[Tobor_8thMan]

Reminds me of doctor telling me I need more exercise. I laugh and tell them I pedal my bike around town for 2,000 miles a year. I then ask, "How much exercise to you get?" As they are stumped, I then say "I get more exercise in 1 bike ride than most get in 1 week." The doctor is quiet and humbled at this point. I'm not done. Time for the kill. I then say, "Join me on a bike ride today. We'll go at least 25 miles.".

I'm usually escorted out of the office and sent on my way. Mission accomplished.

 

[bracconiere]

Haha

LOL, how many pages of old posts did you have to go through to bring this back? what, bored?

and as far as the doctor goes, i just wrote > 3 times a week....and for how many more, "a lot"...lol he felt my liver and said it didn't seem enlarged.....i guess he hasn't seen my post count here, or read the content.....

 

[day_trippr]

A record interwebs thread resuscitation may have occurred here.
Guinness should be notified...

Cheers!

 

[bracconiere]

A record interwebs thread resuscitation may have occurred here.
Guinness should be notified...

Cheers!

iv'e seen them come back from 2009...just never by what i've heard used to be a mod......or admin, wtf ever.....

and my god i swear this just came on youtube, by chance....lol

 

[passedpawn]

It had no replies. I was skindiving and saw it sunk to the bottom there, and tied a balloon to it.

 

[bracconiere]

It had no replies. I was skindiving and saw it sunk to the bottom there, and tied to balloon to it.

damn it, and i just posted pictures of someone using condoms for airlocks.......lol

 

[applescrap]

I hope to get some exercise soon! Good find

 

[Broothru]

During my physical, my doctor asked me about my daily activity level,
and so I described a typical day this way:

"Well, yesterday afternoon, I waded along the edge of a lake, drank eight beers, escaped from wild dogs in the heavy brush, marched up and down several rocky hills, stood in a patch of poison ivy, crawled out of quicksand. and jumped away from an aggressive rattlesnake"
Inspired by the story, the doctor said, "You must be one hell of an outdoors man!"

"No," I replied, "I'm just a lousy golfer."

Yeah, "short grass" is for sissies.

Real golfers are the ones who challenge their skill set and thus succeed in keeping things interesting, unlike those who think it's manly to place the ball where shots can be easily played.

Frankly I pity the likes of Dustin Johnson and others like him who never step up and take the path less taken to the sand, er, green.

Brooo Brother

 

[passedpawn]

Yeah, "short grass" is for sissies.

Real golfers are the ones who challenge their skill set and thus succeed in keeping things interesting, unlike those who think it's manly to place the ball where shots can be easily played.

Frankly I pity the likes of Dustin Johnson and others like him who never step up and take the path less taken to the sand, er, green.

Brooo Brother

Exactly. Plus, those dummies on the pro tour are only getting like 70-ish shots per round. That is not getting your money's worth, IMO. I get about 50% more product for the same money.

 

[passedpawn]

Golf joke:

Dude goes golfing with his pastor. Dark clouds all day threaten their game with rain. Dude misses easy putt on hole #1, and curses "Aw jeesus, missed an easy one". Pastor frowns and tells him not to use Christ's name in vain. 9th hole, same thing, Dude misses putt, curses "frigging christ, missed again!". Pastor again reprimands him.

On the final 18th green, as the rain starts descending, again Dude curses after missing an easy putt "jeesus H Christ, missed again!". As the pastor begins reprimanding the Dude, the dark clouds part and a mighty finger can be seen poking them and pointing to the green. Lighting shoots from the finger to the green, striking the Pastor dead. As the thunder dies down, a mighty voice from the clouds says "fark, missed again!".

 

[jrgtr42]

Exactly. Plus, those dummies on the pro tour are only getting like 70-ish shots per round. That is not getting your money's worth, IMO. I get about 50% more product for the same money.

There was an old comic strip, that they're playing golf, and one character says to the other, "So let me get this straight. The fewer shots you take, the better you're doing?" "yep," the other replies. The first then asks, "So... why do it at all?"