CreamyGoodness
Well-Known Member
How is it I can spend several hours brewing or cooking, and I was able to commit to a lifetime of marriage, but sitting still during a movie is pure torture?
The wife insisted I sit with her last night and watch "This is 40". Cute movie, and I'm sure parts of it are very true. Problem is, it goes on forever. First thing I notice as she is clicking "buy" on the remote is "2 hours and 17 minutes". I'm thinking "fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu$#"
Right around the 1 hour mark I start getting bored, so I get up to check in on HBT in the next room. I hear her pause the damn thing and say "what are you doing??" I thought I was being clever and shaving some time off this sentence, but she's got one on me. Point wife.
Come an hour and a half and Im praying the cable goes out. Most of the gags we have seen in a million other movies, and the leading actors are starting to get on my nerves. That woman is beautiful, yes, but that voice is repulsive. I'm starting to get resentful that I have to sit another 40 something minutes. Apparently I crossed my arms and made a bratty face. I even tried silently hypnotising myself and going into a trance for the next 40 minutes, but it didnt work. I know claiming I have to go to the bathroom isnt going to work because she is just going to pause it. I'm finding new and interesting reasons to hate the characters. Paul Rudd has a stupid head.
"Fine, nevermind, you can play Warcraft for 2 hours without batting an eye but you cant spend that time watching a movie with me." Oh if only it were as simple as admitting this. Getting up now would be a really really bad call. "No no its fine I want to watch it." I leave off "... as much as I want anal fissures."
At the two hour mark I realize I still have 17 minutes to go. I've bitten off all my nails and have started on my scabs. I'm drinking scotch to kill the pain and my wife is heartlessly laughing at what Paul Rudd and his stupid head and the hot chick with the terrible voice talking about whatever nonsense they are talking about. I start making my own movie in my head. In my version stupid head and his wife are driving their damn stupid SUV and an airplane that has all the "real housewives" and that chick from "Weeds" crash into it, killing everyone instantly. I'd watch 2 hours of that over and over. The credits FINALLY start rolling and, like an idiot, I think out loud "Thank f*&%ing God"
I almost wind up having to sleep on the couch.
*sigh* it will pass.
The wife insisted I sit with her last night and watch "This is 40". Cute movie, and I'm sure parts of it are very true. Problem is, it goes on forever. First thing I notice as she is clicking "buy" on the remote is "2 hours and 17 minutes". I'm thinking "fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu$#"
Right around the 1 hour mark I start getting bored, so I get up to check in on HBT in the next room. I hear her pause the damn thing and say "what are you doing??" I thought I was being clever and shaving some time off this sentence, but she's got one on me. Point wife.
Come an hour and a half and Im praying the cable goes out. Most of the gags we have seen in a million other movies, and the leading actors are starting to get on my nerves. That woman is beautiful, yes, but that voice is repulsive. I'm starting to get resentful that I have to sit another 40 something minutes. Apparently I crossed my arms and made a bratty face. I even tried silently hypnotising myself and going into a trance for the next 40 minutes, but it didnt work. I know claiming I have to go to the bathroom isnt going to work because she is just going to pause it. I'm finding new and interesting reasons to hate the characters. Paul Rudd has a stupid head.
"Fine, nevermind, you can play Warcraft for 2 hours without batting an eye but you cant spend that time watching a movie with me." Oh if only it were as simple as admitting this. Getting up now would be a really really bad call. "No no its fine I want to watch it." I leave off "... as much as I want anal fissures."
At the two hour mark I realize I still have 17 minutes to go. I've bitten off all my nails and have started on my scabs. I'm drinking scotch to kill the pain and my wife is heartlessly laughing at what Paul Rudd and his stupid head and the hot chick with the terrible voice talking about whatever nonsense they are talking about. I start making my own movie in my head. In my version stupid head and his wife are driving their damn stupid SUV and an airplane that has all the "real housewives" and that chick from "Weeds" crash into it, killing everyone instantly. I'd watch 2 hours of that over and over. The credits FINALLY start rolling and, like an idiot, I think out loud "Thank f*&%ing God"
I almost wind up having to sleep on the couch.
*sigh* it will pass.
