Dear hallway crop dusters

[m_c_zero]

I hate you. You know who you are. That is all...

 

[DisturbdChemist]

I just wanted to share the wealth a little. Just like the president said

 

[tre9er]

sorry, this is one of my favorite things to do. Used to play pranks on people on production floor all the time, act like I was checking quality or something then dust their area as I walked away.

 

[GilaMinumBeer]

I do not resort to such frivolity as is the hallway dusting.

No. Instead, I fumigate your office/cubicle while you are away making copies.

 

[McBrewskie]

Lulz. The best is getting a crowded restaurant when you're waiting for a table. Just walk to the bathroom and get everyone and hopefully someone finishing decides to GTFO.

 

[DisturbdChemist]

I just think about the scene in Liar Liar in the elevator.. but not saying it was you.

 

[Misplaced_Canuck]

If you know who's doing it, quietly install pine-tree car fresheners in their cube... They'll get the message. Or not.

MC

 

[Homercidal]

Just once I'd like to mix up a meal of eggs, cabbage, and beans, and make everyone's day miserable!

 

[jmendez29]

I got cropped in the elevator at work a couple nights ago. The guy who did it had to have gotten off at another floor as nobody else was around. Worst part was that I didn't realize it until the doors closed, and it was the slowest elevator EVAR!!!

 

[Golddiggie]

I did one in the hall, outside of our secure doors. I was talking with a friend that works a later shift when I let it out. If I recall, it wasn't silent, and it was very potent. Suffice to say, he didn't walk through that area for a while (he would have to in order to get to where he needed to go). One of the IS guys walked through it and I thought it was going to lay him out.

Only time better was when I let one out from my cube that they heard about 100 feet away. :rockin:

I still get a good laugh thinking about either one.

 

[McBrewskie]

Just once I'd like to mix up a meal of eggs, cabbage, and beans, and make everyone's day miserable!

Oh, I have a few meals that work.

Last night I did Italian sausages, kraut, pickled eggs, and beer.

But, my favorite is making a good sandwich. Like this.

Summer sausage, pickled onions, pickled eggs, blue cheese. Grilled to perfection with an IPA.

 

[david_42]

Although it was many years ago, I never topped this one: The pastor had just said a prayer for a recent deader and said, "And now a minute of silent prayer for the survivors."

BRAPP!

 

[dkwolf]

I *hate* people that will crowd you in a store (say Target, WalMart, etc) - if you're looking at something, the rest of that department could be completely empty but they still need to look at the Same. Exact. Thing. And stand inside your personal space. Even worse is when they follow you through a couple aisles.

I have no remorse carpet bombing them. ESPECIALLY if I can time it so the NEXT person walking into the aisle thinks it was the stalker.

And dog help them if I made my extra-heavy-duty garlic bread that week. I live alone, so when I make pasta, I cut an entire loaf of french bread for garlic bread...and eat it for the next 3 days. At the end of that, standing behind me is not a good idea if you enjoy breathing.

 

[jgln]

I *hate* people that will crowd you in a store (say Target, WalMart, etc) - if you're looking at something, the rest of that department could be completely empty but they still need to look at the Same. Exact. Thing. And stand inside your personal space. Even worse is when they follow you through a couple aisles.

I have no remorse carpet bombing them. ESPECIALLY if I can time it so the NEXT person walking into the aisle thinks it was the stalker.

And dog help them if I made my extra-heavy-duty garlic bread that week. I live alone, so when I make pasta, I cut an entire loaf of french bread for garlic bread...and eat it for the next 3 days. At the end of that, standing behind me is not a good idea if you enjoy breathing.

Wow, so if you are say looking at toasters and someone else wants to look at toasters as well you are pissed at them? Granted I would love to be looking at toasters alone but I doubt I would blame them for not waiting for me to leave the area.

I will say this though, if I notice I am shopping in the same pattern/order as someone else, especially a woman, I will change my path so not to appear to be following them. But that happens fairly often. I find that many times as I move through a department or grocery store shopping, I seem to be moving through the isles with the same group of people.

 

[jgln]

I got cropped in the elevator at work a couple nights ago. The guy who did it had to have gotten off at another floor as nobody else was around. Worst part was that I didn't realize it until the doors closed, and it was the slowest elevator EVAR!!!

Could have been worse, could have been a fast elevator and stopped at the next floor and when the doors opened 4 people entered and it was only you in there.

 

[HeavyKettleBrewing]

Curry and the dutch oven.

 

[TheMan]

I *hate* people that will crowd you in a store (say Target, WalMart, etc) - if you're looking at something, the rest of that department could be completely empty but they still need to look at the Same. Exact. Thing. And stand inside your personal space. Even worse is when they follow you through a couple aisles.

I have no remorse carpet bombing them. ESPECIALLY if I can time it so the NEXT person walking into the aisle thinks it was the stalker.

And dog help them if I made my extra-heavy-duty garlic bread that week. I live alone, so when I make pasta, I cut an entire loaf of french bread for garlic bread...and eat it for the next 3 days. At the end of that, standing behind me is not a good idea if you enjoy breathing.

When someone is invading my personal space I gladly let one loose. Sometimes ill even then look at them in disgust as if it was them...while we both know it was me. They leave you alone then.

 

[wolfstar]

Many moons ago, I was a teenager on his own. Having left home at an early age, I was responsible for feeding myself...There has never been much I do NOT like, so anything goes, especially when you are 16, going to school, and working full time trying to stay afloat.

One night for dinner I ate a quart of cottage cheese and some sort of multigrain baguette. I think that was what caused my leavings the next day to not only be smelt, but tasted. I managed to make a little 14 year old Jehovah Witness girl to scrunch up her face and tell me to "take a sh*t or something". Alas, that day was memorable enough that someone wrote in my yearbook to never fart in public...I have yet to recreate that day, much to my dissapointment...

 

[dkwolf]

Wow, so if you are say looking at toasters and someone else wants to look at toasters as well you are pissed at them? Granted I would love to be looking at toasters alone but I doubt I would blame them for not waiting for me to leave the area.

I will say this though, if I notice I am shopping in the same pattern/order as someone else, especially a woman, I will change my path so not to appear to be following them. But that happens fairly often. I find that many times as I move through a department or grocery store shopping, I seem to be moving through the isles with the same group of people.

Not what I said, is it? If you need to look at toasters also, fine. But you can look at toasters without invading my personal space. Or you can look at blenders for a minute while I finish looking at toasters. I promise I'll provide you the same courtesy.

 

[m_c_zero]

There's a special place in hell for those people who fart in elevators...

 

[Whattawort]

There's a special place in hell for those people who fart in elevators...

Well crap. Guess I'll get in line for a window seat. What can I say, I think it's still fun to let one go right before I get off the elevator. It gives people something new to talk about and there's a new office mystery. I see it as public service really.

 

[m_c_zero]

It really is the perfect crime.

 

[unionrdr]

I did it in the elvator of the county administration building once. Had a meeting to go to. I had biscuits,gravy taters & eggs for breakfast. We got back on the elevator,& while folks were talking,I let it go. Nearly silent,but it packed a conciderable wallop. People were looking like all their names were ralph. One woman looked at me with hate in her eyes. Who,lil ol' me?! And yeah,when we got off,I turned & said it was me!! True story from 20 some years ago.

 

[jgln]

Not what I said, is it? If you need to look at toasters also, fine. But you can look at toasters without invading my personal space. Or you can look at blenders for a minute while I finish looking at toasters. I promise I'll provide you the same courtesy.

I am sorry but you did complain about people looking at the same exact item as you at the same time you are and then complain that they also invade your space. If someone is looking at toasters and I want to look at toasters too, well then I'm looking at toasters with you. I am not going to waste my time looking at something else I have no interest in. I think it common courtesy to understand you are not alone in the store and others may want to look at the same thing you are. If I am looking at something and I notice someone else is too I do my best to let them look at it with me.

Now if someone is breathing over my shoulder or bumping into me that of course is different but you did suggest they wait to shop until you are done. I don't agree there.

 

[ReverseApacheMaster]

When I worked in a cubicle there were a few times I carpet bombed myself so bad I'd have to turn on the desk fan at my desk to blow the smell into the cubicles next to me.

 

[TzeentchPlayer]

I used to work retail and my team would regularly crop dust each other early in the morning when no one was shopping. Occasionally we would let one rip only to see someone turn the corner to come down the aisle. Needless to say we made off real quick.

There was a time where it was busy on a Saturday afternoon and I was working with another employee and he just let one rip when it was real busy. It smelled horrible, but the hilarious part was that a mom was walking by with her child and she said "it smells like someone needs a diaper change!" when in fact, she was victim to a crop dusting. lol

On top of all this we would all regularly "shock pot" the unisex employee bathroom.

 

[bottlebomber]

I did it in the elvator of the county administration building once. Had a meeting to go to. I had biscuits,gravy taters & eggs for breakfast. We got back on the elevator,& while folks were talking,I let it go. Nearly silent,but it packed a conciderable wallop. People were looking like all their names were ralph. One woman looked at me with hate in her eyes. Who,lil ol' me?! And yeah,when we got off,I turned & said it was me!! True story from 20 some years ago.

I like you more now than I did before reading this

 

[jgln]

Not what I said, is it? If you need to look at toasters also, fine. But you can look at toasters without invading my personal space. Or you can look at blenders for a minute while I finish looking at toasters. I promise I'll provide you the same courtesy.

Hey, I was just thinking. I am going to go on vacation next week so how about we forget this all and just be friends.

 

[H-ost]

This is one of my favorite threads now.

I crop dust all the time but, the way I see it, it is for the benefit of my g/f. If I didn't let it out for people I don't know then she would get it even worse when we get back home.

My biggest annoyance is people that don't own up to it when it was clearly them. I will always own up to mine if I know they are noticeable but my co worker is a great example of someone who doesn't. There are two of us in this warehouse and I know it wasn't me you a**hole, just admit it. But he can't... this is someone who has literally said "my **** doesn't stink"... It does stink but you just have your head so far up your own a** that you've gotten used to the smell... jerkwad...

 

[dkwolf]

When I worked in a cubicle there were a few times I carpet bombed myself so bad I'd have to turn on the desk fan at my desk to blow the smell into the cubicles next to me.

There are two reasons there are two desk fans in my cubicle.

One is the historically poor performance of our HVAC system.

The other is cubicle gas warfare.